Cannibal Corpse
The Warfield, San Francisco
November 27, 2009
This show fell in the middle of a 5 day stretch where Umlaut had to stay in a luxury hotel away from Casa de Umlaut due to a home improvement project... and 48 hours prior to the show I had read The Road in one night in the hotel room. That bleak, darker than dark book put me in the mood for some bleak, and darker than dark Metal.
The bill tonight was a Frankenstein-like combination of two existing tours to make one ridiculous 10 band, all day lineup inside The Warfield that started at 3:00pm... The show combined the Hatebreed / Cannibal Corpse tour with another tour featuring one of Umlaut's least favorite bands Trivium. Cannibal Corpse were the only band I wanted to see on this bill. Ironically, the show also fell on probably THE worst day of the year to enter downtown San Francisco as it fell on (1) Black Friday, (2) the monthly bike / car clusterfuck Critical Mass, and (3) in the middle of a holiday weekend. Trivia: Umlaut witnessed the very first Critical Mass in 1992 as he drank beers at a bar in The Mission and naked people rode past on bikes; it was lame then and it's even lamer now. Cars Rule... and my Prius can kick your bike's ass! Anyway, in order for me to avoid any potential vehicular manslaughter charges I opted to take BART to the show. I was sorted for a +1 on the Cannibal Corpse guest list and it was going to be a surgically precise evening.
Anyway, that was the plan when I woke up that morning. It was a cold, rainy day and I could not get warm as the morning rolled into afternoon; I was FREEZING, dude. Then as I ran errands during the day I started to feel funky... Then at 4:00pm I knew I was getting sick... Then by 5:30pm I knew I had a fever. FUCK.
Long story short: A hotel is just about the worst place to be sick... but since we couldn't return to Casa de Umlaut for another 36 hours I was stuck. While Skychick went shopping I went to bed and wrapped myself in 2 blankets, my longsleeve Behemoth tour shirt, and a hoodie to try and break the fever. I hallucinated, my head felt like it was going to explode for hours, my body felt like it was being slow cooked from the inside with a virus baste. Skychick returned with food at some point but I barely remember eating it. Eventually I fell asleep.
When I woke up this morning it was sunny outside the hotel window and the fever was gone... just... like... that. It was too early to go downstairs to the hotel cafe for breakfast so I listened to Mastodon - Crack The Skye on the iPod... and I guess I fell back asleep. I thought I was eating a magnificent meal... but then I woke up and realized I had been dreaming and I was fucking starving.
THEN I noticed there was a text message on my iPhone..... from Vic Rattlehead... who I haven't been in touch with since 1992. Yes, there is a story here, but I can't talk about it yet so we'll see where it goes. Stay tuned. Peace sells, but who's buying...
Later this afternoon we'll be moving back into Casa de Umlaut... hauling all of the furniture and the detritus from our lives back inside from the storage unit that's parked on the driveway. I'm just thankful the fever only visited me for around 15 hours... because it would have SUCKED moving stuff while sick.
Anyway, hit reset on life.
Saturday, November 28, 2009
Monday, November 23, 2009
It's Cold Gin Time Again
KISS / Buckcherry
Oracle Arena, Oakland, CA
November 22, 2009
Earlier in the day, I was a bit bummed that I was missing Heathenfest at the DNA Lounge tonight. The Norwegian band Vreid were on the bill and I've been wanting to check them out ever since I got into their latest album Milorg, a concept album chronicling the Norwegian resistance movement against the Nazis in World War 2 (!). It's Metal AND educational; the liner notes alone are great. Alas, Umlaut can't be everywhere at once... and as events unfolded it was obvious I had made the right choice of events for this Sunday night.
I grew up during the original KISS Generation, and KISS were like my first girlfriend; they were the first Rock band I ever got serious about. However, I was done with them by 1979 after they put out the disco pandering 'I Was Made For Loving You' and while other friends kept their fandom alive over the years, I buried mine before my 15th birthday and moved on. Later in the 20th Century, I saw 2 shows on the Reunion Tour back in 1996-2000 and had a great time at both (1996: Louisiana Superdome with the Melvins supporting.... 2000: Oracle Arena with Ted Nugent...). However, KISS became "KISS" to me when Ace Frehley was kicked out of the band in 2002 and Tommy Thayer donned Ace's makeup and Eric Singer became The Cat in place of Peter Criss; having "replacements" donning the iconic makeup seemed blasphemous and false. The argument has been made that other bands change members all the time, but with KISS there is something very emotional and sacred about the original members that exists for no other band. Although I haven't been a "true" KISS fan in years, I still felt outrage over "imposters" wearing The Spaceman and Cat makeup and could never see being "okay" with it. I felt that way..... until tonight.
After the chilly guest list drama of the night before in San Jose I was a little apprehensive as I approached Will Call. However, as soon as I saw the envelope that had been left in my name I knew we were gonna have ourselves a Lock 'N Loll party tonight!
With the magic plastic around our necks there was no way I was going to enter the venue via the civilian entrance, so we walked around to the truck ramp and entered the show properly via the backstage door. We wandered around backstage and checked out catering and the production office before finding our seats... but I didn't stay there long as I went to meet a friend for a drink in the concourse and then found myself backstage again with Wexford Girl and The Bassist.
Wexford Girl introduced me to a couple of KISS' high ranking crew guys and we stood in a hallway chatting as the VIP meet & greet was being organized around us. As we waited I ran into 4-5 former colleagues from "another" merch company where I used to work; although it's been awhile it was nice catching up with them. Then we noticed a commotion at the end of the hallway and suddenly KISS came marching into view to take their place inside the meet & greet room... but as Gene was about to enter the room his attention was distracted by a couple of chicks who seemed to have bum rushed backstage (at the 0:17 second mark of the video):
Also note Paul was air guitaring to Buckcherry (who were onstage at that moment) as he walked into the room.
We waited as the other guests were ushered into the room for their photo op, and at one point KISS' tour manager came back to check on us and asked "Why are these people going in ahead of you?? You should have gone in first.." Say what you will about KISS, but their people really took good care of us (THANKS!). Finally it was our turn, and we were ushered into the room where the band members stood in front of a backdrop. Gene immediately gravitated towards Wexford Girl (of course) and we did a quick pose as the band's photographer took a couple of shots. Eric Singer asked me something and I said something in response and as we were leaving I turned back around, took a couple of steps, stuck out my hand and shook Gene's hand and said something to him... and he said something back... and that was that. I met Gene Simmons and lived.
After our close encounter with Gene & Co. we few, we happy few, laughed our way to a beer vendor for a celebratory cold one and found our seats and minutes later the houselights went down... "Oakland! You wanted the best, and you got it... The hottest band in the world... KISS!!" I was caught completely off guard by how great the band was from the moment they hit the stage with the old school double punch of 'Deuce' > 'Strutter'... Oh man, as soon as they launched into 'Strutter' (perhaps my favorite KISS song) something went off in my head and I was 12-years old again. "Everybody says she's lookin' good.. and the lady knows it's understood... STRUTTER!"
The view from Umlaut's seat.. Section 127..
I'll get this out of the way now: This was THE MOST FUN show of the year. Hands down. No contest... Game over, man... Game over. The entire evening was so easy and everything that a Lock 'N Loll experience should be. I haven't laughed so much at a show in a long time and it's funny how I still know ALL the lyrics to the old KISS songs... and, as much as part of me hated to admit it, Tommy Thayer was GREAT on lead guitar and played Ace's old solos note and nuance perfect and moved around the stage with more energy than Ace ever did.. I know, sacrilege perhaps, but I only speak the truth... However, I did have a problem with Thayer singing Ace's signature song 'Shock Me' and Eric Singer singing Peter Criss' song 'Black Diamond'. At least they didn't have Singer sing 'Beth'.. but 'Shock Me' was just plain wrong.... but my outrage soon disappeared as THE FUN of the show swept me away again (sorry Ace and Peter..). So much FUN... 'Hotter Than Hell' with Gene fire breathing... 'Calling Dr. Love'... 'Parasite'... '100,000 Years'.. 'Shout It Out Loud'.. Gene spitting blood then flying up to the top of the lighting rig to sing 'I Love It Loud'... Say what you will about KISS, but they still put on an amazing Arena Rock show... over the top production and stage design.. and they know how to work a stage and a crowd like few other bands these days.
Two songs off the new Walmart-only CD were played, but I used the first song as an opportunity to hit the bathroom, as did alot of other dudes. Great minds think alike! As I got back to my seat Paul was going into his onstage banter to introduce the next song by saying "When you're feeling down you KNOW there's only ONE THING that will pick you up.." and I shouted "COLD GIN!!" and the dude behind me heard that and said "YEAH!! COLD GIN!!!" At that point I should probably have turned around to high five him, but I didn't.. but a couple of seconds later the band launched into... 'COLD GIN'! You know it's the only thing that keeps us together.
Another aspect of the KISS live experience has always been the cheesy element, especially Paul's between song banter. I wish I had counted how many times he said "PEOPLE!" when addressing the crowd... "PEOPLE listen here..".... "PEOPLE we have a song...".... "PEOPLE!"... and then Paul flew:
What a fucking FUN night.. Say what you will about KISS, but I left the show feeling HAPPY... REALLY HAPPY... and that doesn't happen very often. No, KISS won't change my life at this point.. but they reminded me that life is not bad at all. I still wanna Lock 'N Loll all night and party every day... and it's always funny when a stranger comes up to me at a show and asks "Are you Umlaut??"
Number of Landmine Marathon shirts = 1 (mine). I didn't even bother to try and do a merch audit because the merch area was the size of a small store. On the way back to the car, some pimply-faced teenagers called us fags. As I drink my morning coffee and prepare for the chaotic week of home renovation that I have ahead of me, it's nice to know that I can still be 12-years old in my head and have FUN in that innocent way again. Okay, back to the 21st Century.
Click HERE to see Photo Ray's pics from the show!
Oracle Arena, Oakland, CA
November 22, 2009
Earlier in the day, I was a bit bummed that I was missing Heathenfest at the DNA Lounge tonight. The Norwegian band Vreid were on the bill and I've been wanting to check them out ever since I got into their latest album Milorg, a concept album chronicling the Norwegian resistance movement against the Nazis in World War 2 (!). It's Metal AND educational; the liner notes alone are great. Alas, Umlaut can't be everywhere at once... and as events unfolded it was obvious I had made the right choice of events for this Sunday night.
I grew up during the original KISS Generation, and KISS were like my first girlfriend; they were the first Rock band I ever got serious about. However, I was done with them by 1979 after they put out the disco pandering 'I Was Made For Loving You' and while other friends kept their fandom alive over the years, I buried mine before my 15th birthday and moved on. Later in the 20th Century, I saw 2 shows on the Reunion Tour back in 1996-2000 and had a great time at both (1996: Louisiana Superdome with the Melvins supporting.... 2000: Oracle Arena with Ted Nugent...). However, KISS became "KISS" to me when Ace Frehley was kicked out of the band in 2002 and Tommy Thayer donned Ace's makeup and Eric Singer became The Cat in place of Peter Criss; having "replacements" donning the iconic makeup seemed blasphemous and false. The argument has been made that other bands change members all the time, but with KISS there is something very emotional and sacred about the original members that exists for no other band. Although I haven't been a "true" KISS fan in years, I still felt outrage over "imposters" wearing The Spaceman and Cat makeup and could never see being "okay" with it. I felt that way..... until tonight.
After the chilly guest list drama of the night before in San Jose I was a little apprehensive as I approached Will Call. However, as soon as I saw the envelope that had been left in my name I knew we were gonna have ourselves a Lock 'N Loll party tonight!
Umlaut's All Access Laminate
(color removed to make it harder for sneaky fucks to counterfeit)
(color removed to make it harder for sneaky fucks to counterfeit)
With the magic plastic around our necks there was no way I was going to enter the venue via the civilian entrance, so we walked around to the truck ramp and entered the show properly via the backstage door. We wandered around backstage and checked out catering and the production office before finding our seats... but I didn't stay there long as I went to meet a friend for a drink in the concourse and then found myself backstage again with Wexford Girl and The Bassist.
Wexford Girl introduced me to a couple of KISS' high ranking crew guys and we stood in a hallway chatting as the VIP meet & greet was being organized around us. As we waited I ran into 4-5 former colleagues from "another" merch company where I used to work; although it's been awhile it was nice catching up with them. Then we noticed a commotion at the end of the hallway and suddenly KISS came marching into view to take their place inside the meet & greet room... but as Gene was about to enter the room his attention was distracted by a couple of chicks who seemed to have bum rushed backstage (at the 0:17 second mark of the video):
(Vid by Umlaut)
Also note Paul was air guitaring to Buckcherry (who were onstage at that moment) as he walked into the room.
We waited as the other guests were ushered into the room for their photo op, and at one point KISS' tour manager came back to check on us and asked "Why are these people going in ahead of you?? You should have gone in first.." Say what you will about KISS, but their people really took good care of us (THANKS!). Finally it was our turn, and we were ushered into the room where the band members stood in front of a backdrop. Gene immediately gravitated towards Wexford Girl (of course) and we did a quick pose as the band's photographer took a couple of shots. Eric Singer asked me something and I said something in response and as we were leaving I turned back around, took a couple of steps, stuck out my hand and shook Gene's hand and said something to him... and he said something back... and that was that. I met Gene Simmons and lived.
After our close encounter with Gene & Co. we few, we happy few, laughed our way to a beer vendor for a celebratory cold one and found our seats and minutes later the houselights went down... "Oakland! You wanted the best, and you got it... The hottest band in the world... KISS!!" I was caught completely off guard by how great the band was from the moment they hit the stage with the old school double punch of 'Deuce' > 'Strutter'... Oh man, as soon as they launched into 'Strutter' (perhaps my favorite KISS song) something went off in my head and I was 12-years old again. "Everybody says she's lookin' good.. and the lady knows it's understood... STRUTTER!"
The view from Umlaut's seat.. Section 127..I'll get this out of the way now: This was THE MOST FUN show of the year. Hands down. No contest... Game over, man... Game over. The entire evening was so easy and everything that a Lock 'N Loll experience should be. I haven't laughed so much at a show in a long time and it's funny how I still know ALL the lyrics to the old KISS songs... and, as much as part of me hated to admit it, Tommy Thayer was GREAT on lead guitar and played Ace's old solos note and nuance perfect and moved around the stage with more energy than Ace ever did.. I know, sacrilege perhaps, but I only speak the truth... However, I did have a problem with Thayer singing Ace's signature song 'Shock Me' and Eric Singer singing Peter Criss' song 'Black Diamond'. At least they didn't have Singer sing 'Beth'.. but 'Shock Me' was just plain wrong.... but my outrage soon disappeared as THE FUN of the show swept me away again (sorry Ace and Peter..). So much FUN... 'Hotter Than Hell' with Gene fire breathing... 'Calling Dr. Love'... 'Parasite'... '100,000 Years'.. 'Shout It Out Loud'.. Gene spitting blood then flying up to the top of the lighting rig to sing 'I Love It Loud'... Say what you will about KISS, but they still put on an amazing Arena Rock show... over the top production and stage design.. and they know how to work a stage and a crowd like few other bands these days.
Two songs off the new Walmart-only CD were played, but I used the first song as an opportunity to hit the bathroom, as did alot of other dudes. Great minds think alike! As I got back to my seat Paul was going into his onstage banter to introduce the next song by saying "When you're feeling down you KNOW there's only ONE THING that will pick you up.." and I shouted "COLD GIN!!" and the dude behind me heard that and said "YEAH!! COLD GIN!!!" At that point I should probably have turned around to high five him, but I didn't.. but a couple of seconds later the band launched into... 'COLD GIN'! You know it's the only thing that keeps us together.
Another aspect of the KISS live experience has always been the cheesy element, especially Paul's between song banter. I wish I had counted how many times he said "PEOPLE!" when addressing the crowd... "PEOPLE listen here..".... "PEOPLE we have a song...".... "PEOPLE!"... and then Paul flew:
Paul Flies During 'Love Gun' (Vid by Umlaut)
What a fucking FUN night.. Say what you will about KISS, but I left the show feeling HAPPY... REALLY HAPPY... and that doesn't happen very often. No, KISS won't change my life at this point.. but they reminded me that life is not bad at all. I still wanna Lock 'N Loll all night and party every day... and it's always funny when a stranger comes up to me at a show and asks "Are you Umlaut??"
Number of Landmine Marathon shirts = 1 (mine). I didn't even bother to try and do a merch audit because the merch area was the size of a small store. On the way back to the car, some pimply-faced teenagers called us fags. As I drink my morning coffee and prepare for the chaotic week of home renovation that I have ahead of me, it's nice to know that I can still be 12-years old in my head and have FUN in that innocent way again. Okay, back to the 21st Century.
Click HERE to see Photo Ray's pics from the show!
Sunday, November 22, 2009
First And Last
Dethklok / Mastodon / Converge / High On Fire
San Jose State Event Center, San Jose, CA
November 21, 2009
Earlier in the week, Umlaut found himself riding in a limousine through Hollywood on my way to a business meeting... when I spotted this billboard on Sunset Boulevard:
Since I was seeing the Dethklok / Mastodon tour again 3 days later I thought it was *funny*... Sometimes when you're riding in the back of a limo through Hollywood mundane things seem interesting I guess... but I just noticed that the speed limit sign is upside down... *Funny*. Anyway... I can't remember off hand the last time I saw the first show of a tour and the final show of the same tour. Over a month ago, Umlaut was in Portland and caught opening night of this package tour... and now 50 days later I arrived at the San Jose State gymnasium (for a mind boggling 3rd time this year..) to witness the final night of this trek.
Photo Ray and I arrived early so we could catch High On Fire... but at Will Call those dreaded 4 words stopped us in our tracks: "NOT ON THE LIST!". Goddamnfucksonofabitchfuck! Evidently there was a fuck up with the guest lists and almost nobody had anything waiting for them, press and band guests alike. So for the next hour or so I stood around in the chilly San Jose night with press friends and various photographers waiting for something to happen. Unfortunately at that point I went into Lock 'N Loll survival mode and basically abandoned my friends in order to sort out my situation (SORRY Photo Ray, Hard Rock Chick, and Photo Alan...). Thankfully, Mastodon / High On Fire's manager is a stand up guy and, although he was at home in L.A. and it was a Saturday night, he responded to my text message and put me directly in touch with his tour manager backstage... who got my tickets and passes sorted (THANKS Nick and Dave!).
Since I didn't need the extra ticket, I handed it to a random kid who was walking past me with him Mom.. My Metal good deed for the day. However, even this good deed couldn't make up for completely missing High On Fire's set. Goddamnfucksonofabitchfuck!
Once inside, Umlaut encountered the same scenario as in Portland: A VIP pass that was basically useless. I don't mean to look a gift horse in the mouth (or maybe I do...), but it was annoying that a VIP pass tonight only allowed access to a backstage foyer area next to doors that led outside, but not into any of the adjoining areas or hallways. For comparison, a VIP pass at the recent Slipknot show in the same venue allowed me to mooch food in Catering and watch the Rock Stars up close in their natural habitat. The pass tonight also granted access to a taped off VIP area in the stands at stage left, which was gratuitous at best since "civilians" kept jumping the tape and after awhile security stopped policing the section seriously. I know I'm being a spoiled bitch about this, but generally "VIP" means something more at big Lock 'N Loll shows. It really does... but the Will Call drama had set the tone for my night and I was getting annoyed by alot of things by then. ANYWAY... sorry to be a whiny bitch.. but I'm better now.
I'm not that familiar with Converge, but they reminded me of Gallows in some respects... I was most impressed by the fact that a good portion of the nearly sold out crowd booed them in between songs. I haven't heard a crowd boo a support act in a LONG time and this made me like the band even more. Fuck this mainstream suburban crowd! During their set, I wandered backstage with Wexford Girl and The Bassist and we happened to be standing in the backstage foyer area as Converge came offstage. As the singer passed me I tapped his arm and said "GOOD SET" (which I genuinely meant..) and he actually GRUNTED at me in response! WTF.. The Bassist and I looked at each other and started cracking up. Oh, Rock Stars.. During the break in between bands a beer vendor bonded with a customer over how "AWESOME" High On Fire had been, which featured the beer vendor air guitaring.
Prior to this show I was hesitant about seeing Mastodon again because I was afraid I was burned out on them; this would be the 4th time Umlaut has seen them on this tour, where they have been playing the entire Crack The Skye album. It's one of my favorite albums of the year, but did I really need to see it played in its entirety for the 4th time in 7 months? However, as their set time neared I found myself standing behind Mastodon for the 2nd time in 3 months as they prepared to go onstage. This is what it looked like back in August:
Golden Gate Park, S.F.
As I mentioned / bitched about earlier, the Will Call drama put me in kind of a foul mood and I found myself not being into watching Mastodon at all after awhile. As they started to play 'The Czar' (Track 4 on Crack The Skye...) Wexford Girl and I scampered upstairs to the merch table to check out the product and to get another beer. At the merch table we were shocked to find out that Dethklok had basically sold out of merch already except for a few Small size shirts. Impressive! Never underestimate the power of a band backed by corporate cable television marketing. So... as much as I genuinely love Mastodon... I spent most of their set chatting with people, drinking a beer, and geeking out over a poster for a show I saw at the Event Center a thousand years ago.
Sorry Mastodon... I've been following you a long time dating back to your club days, dudes... and I'll still support you... but my head just wasn't *there* for you tonight. During the break between bands I saw a guy who I had seen earlier who was sporting a black eye and a Slayer shirt. METAL!
I tried to go into the show with an open mind about Dethklok, especially since I had a bad attitude about them in Portland... Also, the new season of Metalocalypse has been fucking genius and LAUGH OUT LOUD hilarious so I wanted to like Dethklok tonight. I really did.. However, my opinion wasn't swayed. Yes, the musicianship is good... but come on. This is a Metal band geared for kids and casual Metal fans... There, I said it... and I LOVE the t.v. show.. but those are cartoon characters.. and the acid test for me is if you take away the animation and t.v. show context would the music stand on its own. IMO: Nope. However, it was impressive watching 7,000 cable television viewers going bonkers.
Anyway, it was a jagged night that my head wasn't really into 100% but it was still fun.. and that's all that matters, right? Photo Ray and I bailed after Dethklok played 'Murmaider' (a song about mermaid murder...) in order to grab food and beer at Gordon Biersch.... which was funny because it was the exact same moment that I bailed out of the Portland show. I have to admit, the lobster tacos and pint of Pilsner at Gordon Biersch were THE most brutally excellent things of the evening for me... During the meal I traded text messages with a friend in NYC about a Slaughter video... WTF. Up all night.. sleep all day.
Most band shirts in the crowd = SLAYER. If you bought one of every Mastodon merch item you would have paid around $200. On the way back to the car, some pimply-faced teenagers called us fags. I just read what I've typed here and, man, am I really that spoiled and jaded!? Wow..... I'm looking at the man in the mirror... This morning I woke up to a news report that Michael Jackson's trademark glove sold for over $350,000.. WTF.
San Jose State Event Center, San Jose, CA
November 21, 2009
Earlier in the week, Umlaut found himself riding in a limousine through Hollywood on my way to a business meeting... when I spotted this billboard on Sunset Boulevard:
Since I was seeing the Dethklok / Mastodon tour again 3 days later I thought it was *funny*... Sometimes when you're riding in the back of a limo through Hollywood mundane things seem interesting I guess... but I just noticed that the speed limit sign is upside down... *Funny*. Anyway... I can't remember off hand the last time I saw the first show of a tour and the final show of the same tour. Over a month ago, Umlaut was in Portland and caught opening night of this package tour... and now 50 days later I arrived at the San Jose State gymnasium (for a mind boggling 3rd time this year..) to witness the final night of this trek.Photo Ray and I arrived early so we could catch High On Fire... but at Will Call those dreaded 4 words stopped us in our tracks: "NOT ON THE LIST!". Goddamnfucksonofabitchfuck! Evidently there was a fuck up with the guest lists and almost nobody had anything waiting for them, press and band guests alike. So for the next hour or so I stood around in the chilly San Jose night with press friends and various photographers waiting for something to happen. Unfortunately at that point I went into Lock 'N Loll survival mode and basically abandoned my friends in order to sort out my situation (SORRY Photo Ray, Hard Rock Chick, and Photo Alan...). Thankfully, Mastodon / High On Fire's manager is a stand up guy and, although he was at home in L.A. and it was a Saturday night, he responded to my text message and put me directly in touch with his tour manager backstage... who got my tickets and passes sorted (THANKS Nick and Dave!).
Since I didn't need the extra ticket, I handed it to a random kid who was walking past me with him Mom.. My Metal good deed for the day. However, even this good deed couldn't make up for completely missing High On Fire's set. Goddamnfucksonofabitchfuck!Once inside, Umlaut encountered the same scenario as in Portland: A VIP pass that was basically useless. I don't mean to look a gift horse in the mouth (or maybe I do...), but it was annoying that a VIP pass tonight only allowed access to a backstage foyer area next to doors that led outside, but not into any of the adjoining areas or hallways. For comparison, a VIP pass at the recent Slipknot show in the same venue allowed me to mooch food in Catering and watch the Rock Stars up close in their natural habitat. The pass tonight also granted access to a taped off VIP area in the stands at stage left, which was gratuitous at best since "civilians" kept jumping the tape and after awhile security stopped policing the section seriously. I know I'm being a spoiled bitch about this, but generally "VIP" means something more at big Lock 'N Loll shows. It really does... but the Will Call drama had set the tone for my night and I was getting annoyed by alot of things by then. ANYWAY... sorry to be a whiny bitch.. but I'm better now.
I'm not that familiar with Converge, but they reminded me of Gallows in some respects... I was most impressed by the fact that a good portion of the nearly sold out crowd booed them in between songs. I haven't heard a crowd boo a support act in a LONG time and this made me like the band even more. Fuck this mainstream suburban crowd! During their set, I wandered backstage with Wexford Girl and The Bassist and we happened to be standing in the backstage foyer area as Converge came offstage. As the singer passed me I tapped his arm and said "GOOD SET" (which I genuinely meant..) and he actually GRUNTED at me in response! WTF.. The Bassist and I looked at each other and started cracking up. Oh, Rock Stars.. During the break in between bands a beer vendor bonded with a customer over how "AWESOME" High On Fire had been, which featured the beer vendor air guitaring.
Prior to this show I was hesitant about seeing Mastodon again because I was afraid I was burned out on them; this would be the 4th time Umlaut has seen them on this tour, where they have been playing the entire Crack The Skye album. It's one of my favorite albums of the year, but did I really need to see it played in its entirety for the 4th time in 7 months? However, as their set time neared I found myself standing behind Mastodon for the 2nd time in 3 months as they prepared to go onstage. This is what it looked like back in August:
Golden Gate Park, S.F.As I mentioned / bitched about earlier, the Will Call drama put me in kind of a foul mood and I found myself not being into watching Mastodon at all after awhile. As they started to play 'The Czar' (Track 4 on Crack The Skye...) Wexford Girl and I scampered upstairs to the merch table to check out the product and to get another beer. At the merch table we were shocked to find out that Dethklok had basically sold out of merch already except for a few Small size shirts. Impressive! Never underestimate the power of a band backed by corporate cable television marketing. So... as much as I genuinely love Mastodon... I spent most of their set chatting with people, drinking a beer, and geeking out over a poster for a show I saw at the Event Center a thousand years ago.
Sorry Mastodon... I've been following you a long time dating back to your club days, dudes... and I'll still support you... but my head just wasn't *there* for you tonight. During the break between bands I saw a guy who I had seen earlier who was sporting a black eye and a Slayer shirt. METAL!
I tried to go into the show with an open mind about Dethklok, especially since I had a bad attitude about them in Portland... Also, the new season of Metalocalypse has been fucking genius and LAUGH OUT LOUD hilarious so I wanted to like Dethklok tonight. I really did.. However, my opinion wasn't swayed. Yes, the musicianship is good... but come on. This is a Metal band geared for kids and casual Metal fans... There, I said it... and I LOVE the t.v. show.. but those are cartoon characters.. and the acid test for me is if you take away the animation and t.v. show context would the music stand on its own. IMO: Nope. However, it was impressive watching 7,000 cable television viewers going bonkers.
Anyway, it was a jagged night that my head wasn't really into 100% but it was still fun.. and that's all that matters, right? Photo Ray and I bailed after Dethklok played 'Murmaider' (a song about mermaid murder...) in order to grab food and beer at Gordon Biersch.... which was funny because it was the exact same moment that I bailed out of the Portland show. I have to admit, the lobster tacos and pint of Pilsner at Gordon Biersch were THE most brutally excellent things of the evening for me... During the meal I traded text messages with a friend in NYC about a Slaughter video... WTF. Up all night.. sleep all day.
Most band shirts in the crowd = SLAYER. If you bought one of every Mastodon merch item you would have paid around $200. On the way back to the car, some pimply-faced teenagers called us fags. I just read what I've typed here and, man, am I really that spoiled and jaded!? Wow..... I'm looking at the man in the mirror... This morning I woke up to a news report that Michael Jackson's trademark glove sold for over $350,000.. WTF.
Friday, November 20, 2009
Them Crooked Vultures
Them Crooked Vultures
The Fox Theater, Oakland, CA
November 19, 2009
Although The Fox only reopened this past February, this was my 5th visit to this already sacred place and it already feels like it's been part of The Bay Area music scene for years... at least to me... and I've finally settled upon where my regular parking spot will be for shows here... so, despite having to cross The Bay Bridge into Oaktown, I'm pretty much done with making my Fox experiences just as surgically precise as shows at the other local venues. Excellent... and it's always funny when a stranger comes up to me at a show and asks "Are you Umlaut??" It's even better when that person is wearing a Motörhead shirt.
It's easy to say that Them Crooked Vultures (TCV) are simply the sum of the associated bands... BUT, as a friend said to me the other day, they also represent the ghosts of two iconic bands that no one will ever see again: Nirvana and Led Zeppelin. It's that mystique which sets TCV apart from pretty much every other band at this moment in time. To be honest, I hadn't paid much attention to TCV... I didn't get caught up in the hype over the Summer when they made their debut... I didn't listen to the album at all when it was streaming online... To be honest I didn't really start paying attention to them until they became part of Umlaut's professional world... I picked up the CD on the day of release, which was only 2 days before this show... and after 3 or 4 listens I was interested in what I heard, but I had a feeling seeing this band live would be what was special about them.
For better or worse, anything Josh Homme does will always be compared to Queens Of The Stone Age now, but he'll always be Kyuss to me (remember when Kyuss played The Bottom Of The Hill? Me too..). I'm not a Foo Fighters fan, but I was deep into Nirvana and the fact that Grohl is behind a drum kit again is pretty amazing (remember when he toured clubs and played drums under the radar with his old band Scream at the height of Nirvana mania? Me too..). The band's live sound was augmented by Alain Johannes on guitar and keyboards. For the newbies: Johannes has played on albums by Queens Of The Stone Age, Spinnerette, and Puscifer.
However, despite these Modern Rock icons, it's the Classic Rock icon who makes TCV special. Without John Paul Jones (JPJ), TCV would be just another average band... The magic that he brings to this project can't really be described with mere words.. and he's shown in the past that he's interested in exploring new and diverse music, having worked with the likes of Diamanda Galas and The Butthole Surfers in the years since his old band broke up.
Despite Dave Grohl being behind the drum kit onstage, my eyes were locked on JPJ almost the entire set. Watching him play was riveting... how he held his bass the same way as I've seen in countless Zeppelin videos and photos... how he played with a supernatural sense of ease and also with a inspirational joy; when JPJ smiled during songs it was like 40 years of Rock music history blessing the event... and it was riveting how JPJ switched between instruments so effortlessly. During the 90 minute performance JPJ played the following instruments:
My head finally exploded during the last song of the set. Midway through that final song JPJ moved next to Grohl's drum kit, his back to the audience, and the two locked eyes and they synched into a groove that got my head spinning (or maybe it was from the contact high from all the weed being smoked around me..)... and then Homme moved next to them, with his back also to the audience, and he locked his guitar into the groove too... and that's when my head exploded. It was as if TCV's final statement to the Oakland crowd was "We're a BAND and not simply some iconic musicians playing together to make a quick buck." Onstage TCV are a BAND; you can't fake chemistry like that. Magic. For the record, Homme drank 2 beers and a half a bottle of vodka onstage. Magic.
On another note: Exactly one year ago to the day, Umlaut closed the book on what was the worst professional experience I've ever had.. What made it so painful was that it should have been the most amazing professional experience ever because it involved representing and working on bands who are sacred to me... Fast forward a year from that low point and karma payback is an amazing thing to watch AND experience.. and the fact that I was seeing THIS band on THIS date was amazing and I was tripping hard on it all day. The Rock Godz work in mysterious ways, man.
Members of Metallica = 2. If you bought one of every TCV merch item you would have paid around $150; it's nice to know TCV's merch in the future will be in good hands.. On the way back to the car, some pimply-faced teenagers called me a fag. Not to be a buzzkill, but I just have to say that the After Show scene was, like, totally LAME. Oh well... at least the drive back to Casa de Umlaut was fast and easy.
Them Crooked Vultures have left the building..
The Fox Theater, Oakland, CA
November 19, 2009
Although The Fox only reopened this past February, this was my 5th visit to this already sacred place and it already feels like it's been part of The Bay Area music scene for years... at least to me... and I've finally settled upon where my regular parking spot will be for shows here... so, despite having to cross The Bay Bridge into Oaktown, I'm pretty much done with making my Fox experiences just as surgically precise as shows at the other local venues. Excellent... and it's always funny when a stranger comes up to me at a show and asks "Are you Umlaut??" It's even better when that person is wearing a Motörhead shirt.
It's easy to say that Them Crooked Vultures (TCV) are simply the sum of the associated bands... BUT, as a friend said to me the other day, they also represent the ghosts of two iconic bands that no one will ever see again: Nirvana and Led Zeppelin. It's that mystique which sets TCV apart from pretty much every other band at this moment in time. To be honest, I hadn't paid much attention to TCV... I didn't get caught up in the hype over the Summer when they made their debut... I didn't listen to the album at all when it was streaming online... To be honest I didn't really start paying attention to them until they became part of Umlaut's professional world... I picked up the CD on the day of release, which was only 2 days before this show... and after 3 or 4 listens I was interested in what I heard, but I had a feeling seeing this band live would be what was special about them.
For better or worse, anything Josh Homme does will always be compared to Queens Of The Stone Age now, but he'll always be Kyuss to me (remember when Kyuss played The Bottom Of The Hill? Me too..). I'm not a Foo Fighters fan, but I was deep into Nirvana and the fact that Grohl is behind a drum kit again is pretty amazing (remember when he toured clubs and played drums under the radar with his old band Scream at the height of Nirvana mania? Me too..). The band's live sound was augmented by Alain Johannes on guitar and keyboards. For the newbies: Johannes has played on albums by Queens Of The Stone Age, Spinnerette, and Puscifer.
However, despite these Modern Rock icons, it's the Classic Rock icon who makes TCV special. Without John Paul Jones (JPJ), TCV would be just another average band... The magic that he brings to this project can't really be described with mere words.. and he's shown in the past that he's interested in exploring new and diverse music, having worked with the likes of Diamanda Galas and The Butthole Surfers in the years since his old band broke up.
Despite Dave Grohl being behind the drum kit onstage, my eyes were locked on JPJ almost the entire set. Watching him play was riveting... how he held his bass the same way as I've seen in countless Zeppelin videos and photos... how he played with a supernatural sense of ease and also with a inspirational joy; when JPJ smiled during songs it was like 40 years of Rock music history blessing the event... and it was riveting how JPJ switched between instruments so effortlessly. During the 90 minute performance JPJ played the following instruments:
- 4-string bass
- 12-string bass
- guitar
- organ / electric piano
- electric mandolin
- keytar
- some bizarre instrument that was part bass / part electronic thing.. I couldn't figure out what it was.
My head finally exploded during the last song of the set. Midway through that final song JPJ moved next to Grohl's drum kit, his back to the audience, and the two locked eyes and they synched into a groove that got my head spinning (or maybe it was from the contact high from all the weed being smoked around me..)... and then Homme moved next to them, with his back also to the audience, and he locked his guitar into the groove too... and that's when my head exploded. It was as if TCV's final statement to the Oakland crowd was "We're a BAND and not simply some iconic musicians playing together to make a quick buck." Onstage TCV are a BAND; you can't fake chemistry like that. Magic. For the record, Homme drank 2 beers and a half a bottle of vodka onstage. Magic.
On another note: Exactly one year ago to the day, Umlaut closed the book on what was the worst professional experience I've ever had.. What made it so painful was that it should have been the most amazing professional experience ever because it involved representing and working on bands who are sacred to me... Fast forward a year from that low point and karma payback is an amazing thing to watch AND experience.. and the fact that I was seeing THIS band on THIS date was amazing and I was tripping hard on it all day. The Rock Godz work in mysterious ways, man.
Members of Metallica = 2. If you bought one of every TCV merch item you would have paid around $150; it's nice to know TCV's merch in the future will be in good hands.. On the way back to the car, some pimply-faced teenagers called me a fag. Not to be a buzzkill, but I just have to say that the After Show scene was, like, totally LAME. Oh well... at least the drive back to Casa de Umlaut was fast and easy.
Them Crooked Vultures have left the building..
Monday, November 16, 2009
Old School
Next year is starting off Old School with The American Carnage Tour!!
Awesome, right?! Megadeth / Slayer / Testament.... Dude, the San Francisco show is at the fucking COW PALACE!! The site of so many Hard Rock and Metal shows in the 70's and early 90's (including the original Clash Of The Titans Tour with Slayer and Megadeth)! I can guarantee you that many Old Metalheads are squealing like little school girls about this show being at that venue. It doesn't get more Old School than the Cow Palace!
Instead of a merch audit Umlaut will be counting the number of drunken brawls on the floor that night. A note for the newbies: The crowd action on the GA Floor will be medieval, epic, and Old School. Umlaut is expecting the night to be reminiscent of the Glory Days of Metal shows when posers paid the price... and, assuming the Cow Palace hasn't upgraded their facilities, visit the bathrooms at your own risk.
"Blasting our way through the boundaries of Hell.. no one can stop us tonight.."
Awesome, right?! Megadeth / Slayer / Testament.... Dude, the San Francisco show is at the fucking COW PALACE!! The site of so many Hard Rock and Metal shows in the 70's and early 90's (including the original Clash Of The Titans Tour with Slayer and Megadeth)! I can guarantee you that many Old Metalheads are squealing like little school girls about this show being at that venue. It doesn't get more Old School than the Cow Palace!
Instead of a merch audit Umlaut will be counting the number of drunken brawls on the floor that night. A note for the newbies: The crowd action on the GA Floor will be medieval, epic, and Old School. Umlaut is expecting the night to be reminiscent of the Glory Days of Metal shows when posers paid the price... and, assuming the Cow Palace hasn't upgraded their facilities, visit the bathrooms at your own risk.
"Blasting our way through the boundaries of Hell.. no one can stop us tonight.."
Sunday, November 08, 2009
Gates Of Steel
Devo
The Regency Ballroom, San Francisco
November 7, 2009
Devo marched into San Francisco for a two night stand to perform their seminal debut album on the 1st night and their breakthrough Freedom Of Choice album the next night. The Rock Godz work in mysterious ways and I found myself with a +1 for the 2nd night and for the 2nd time in 3 days I found myself seeing a band from Ohio.
All Music Geeks know that the band's classic Live EP from 1980 was recorded at The Warfield in S.F.. Although I grew up during the Devo Generation I was not a fan as a kid; in 1980 when Freedom Of Choice came out my favorite bands were Cheap Trick, Van Halen, and Black Sabbath... but I came to be a fan as I grew older and wiser. The last time I saw Devo was way back at Lollapalooza 1996 when they shared the main stage with Metallica, Soundgarden, The Ramones, Rancid, and Screaming Trees. In hindsight, that was a helluva bill..
Fast forward to the 21st Century and this was probably the easiest show of the entire year for Umlaut... Lori Acid King and I breezed through the overbearing Regency security check and got to the Will Call table... where the woman acted as if she knew me (I'm sorry.. I didn't remember her!) and complimented my Cheap Trick shirt before handing me the passes from my guest list envelope... Then we got a beer and found seats at the rail in something called the "Reserved Seating Area - Proper Pass Required" section directly above the soundboard. Fucking perfect; all shows should be this easy.
I've never seen the floor of The Regency as packed as it was tonight; it was solid humans from wall to wall and I was thankful to be above all of that, but the mood in the room was nothing but happy. The houselights went down at 10:00pm and the vintage music videos from the Freedom Of Choice era were shown on the screen behind the stage: 'Girl U Want', 'Whip It' (best MTV video ever?), and 'Freedom Of Choice'... As soon as the last video played the band came onstage and a Card Guy walked to the front of the stage holding a sign that read "Track 1" and the band launched into 'Girl U Want'... and for the next 35 minutes Devo rolled through the Freedom Of Choice album, with each song being introduced by the Card Guy and his signs. FUNNY! 'Gates Of Steel' is one of Umlaut's favorite songs, so of course that was my favorite of the night.
'Gates Of Steel'
It was a solid performance... fueled by nostalgia of course... but it was solid fun. After the main set, the band returned for an encore of 'Be Stiff' and 'Beautiful World'. The latter featured an appearance by Booji Boy, who told the crowd that if Michael Jackson could dig his way out of his grave he'd agree with the song. I think we'd all like to believe that, right?
Devo's set ran 55 minutes.. The houselights came up.. I drove Lori Acid King home.. I stopped at Taqueria Cancun to get a burrito to go.. I docked the Prius back at Casa de Umlaut at exactly 11:37pm.. It was an insanely easy surgically precise night. THANKS to Tour Manager Doug for sorting my +1 even though he's in the middle of conquering Europe again.
Trivia: Yes, this is the same Tour Manager Doug whose first concert was Devo on the Freedom Of Choice Tour at the Phoenix Theater in Petaluma, CA (a show that is available on DVD!) and who can be seen wearing one of his Devo shirts circa 1984 in the Slayer box set.
Tour Manager Doug and his Devo shirt with Slayer, Exodus, and Suicidal Tendencies
(Pic from Slayer's Soundtrack to the Apocalypse box set)
If you bought one of every Devo merch item you would have paid around $290. On the way back to the car, some pimply-faced teenagers called us fags. I can't remember the last time I've seen a non-festival headlining band play such a short set, but you can't talk shit about Devo! Everyone leaving the venue seemed happy from the show... and that's all that matters.
"A man is real... not made of steel.."
The Regency Ballroom, San Francisco
November 7, 2009
Devo marched into San Francisco for a two night stand to perform their seminal debut album on the 1st night and their breakthrough Freedom Of Choice album the next night. The Rock Godz work in mysterious ways and I found myself with a +1 for the 2nd night and for the 2nd time in 3 days I found myself seeing a band from Ohio.
All Music Geeks know that the band's classic Live EP from 1980 was recorded at The Warfield in S.F.. Although I grew up during the Devo Generation I was not a fan as a kid; in 1980 when Freedom Of Choice came out my favorite bands were Cheap Trick, Van Halen, and Black Sabbath... but I came to be a fan as I grew older and wiser. The last time I saw Devo was way back at Lollapalooza 1996 when they shared the main stage with Metallica, Soundgarden, The Ramones, Rancid, and Screaming Trees. In hindsight, that was a helluva bill..Fast forward to the 21st Century and this was probably the easiest show of the entire year for Umlaut... Lori Acid King and I breezed through the overbearing Regency security check and got to the Will Call table... where the woman acted as if she knew me (I'm sorry.. I didn't remember her!) and complimented my Cheap Trick shirt before handing me the passes from my guest list envelope... Then we got a beer and found seats at the rail in something called the "Reserved Seating Area - Proper Pass Required" section directly above the soundboard. Fucking perfect; all shows should be this easy.
I've never seen the floor of The Regency as packed as it was tonight; it was solid humans from wall to wall and I was thankful to be above all of that, but the mood in the room was nothing but happy. The houselights went down at 10:00pm and the vintage music videos from the Freedom Of Choice era were shown on the screen behind the stage: 'Girl U Want', 'Whip It' (best MTV video ever?), and 'Freedom Of Choice'... As soon as the last video played the band came onstage and a Card Guy walked to the front of the stage holding a sign that read "Track 1" and the band launched into 'Girl U Want'... and for the next 35 minutes Devo rolled through the Freedom Of Choice album, with each song being introduced by the Card Guy and his signs. FUNNY! 'Gates Of Steel' is one of Umlaut's favorite songs, so of course that was my favorite of the night.
'Gates Of Steel'Devo's set ran 55 minutes.. The houselights came up.. I drove Lori Acid King home.. I stopped at Taqueria Cancun to get a burrito to go.. I docked the Prius back at Casa de Umlaut at exactly 11:37pm.. It was an insanely easy surgically precise night. THANKS to Tour Manager Doug for sorting my +1 even though he's in the middle of conquering Europe again.
Trivia: Yes, this is the same Tour Manager Doug whose first concert was Devo on the Freedom Of Choice Tour at the Phoenix Theater in Petaluma, CA (a show that is available on DVD!) and who can be seen wearing one of his Devo shirts circa 1984 in the Slayer box set.
Tour Manager Doug and his Devo shirt with Slayer, Exodus, and Suicidal Tendencies(Pic from Slayer's Soundtrack to the Apocalypse box set)
If you bought one of every Devo merch item you would have paid around $290. On the way back to the car, some pimply-faced teenagers called us fags. I can't remember the last time I've seen a non-festival headlining band play such a short set, but you can't talk shit about Devo! Everyone leaving the venue seemed happy from the show... and that's all that matters.
"A man is real... not made of steel.."
Saturday, November 07, 2009
Size Doesn't Matter
Alternative Tentacles 30th Anniversary Incest-A-Thon
Featuring Jello Biafra & The Guantanamo School of Medicine / Ludicra / Munly & the Lupercalians
Great American Music Hall, San Francisco
November 6, 2009
This was Night #2 of Alternative Tentacles' 3-Night 30th Anniversary celebration with each night featuring Jello as headliner with his most recent band (The Guantanamo School Of Medicine) supported by different AT bands. I would love to have seen Alice Donut and Victim's Family on the final night, but since Umlaut had to choose I of course got a ticket to the night when the mighty Ludicra were on the bill.
However, for the 3rd gig in a row the attendance at this show was shockingly small; as with Rob Zombie and Puscifer *something* kept the crowds away... and in the case of tonight I would bet that *something* was there was simply too much going on in San Francisco, with a packed Dinosaur Jr. show across town at The Fillmore and a sold out Devo show only a couple of blocks away at The Regency. However, whereas the small crowds at the Zombie and Puscifer shows had been a negative distraction to me, it was the complete opposite for Jello's party. The small crowd actually added to the positive, special quality of the night... and this was quite simply THE MOST FUN show of the year!! No shit.
We arrived in time to see the awkwardly named Munly & the Lupercalians and I felt a bit dubious about them as they walked onstage because they looked bizarre: 5 members... 4 of them wearing hoods... 2 of the members (the percussionists) wore execution style hoods with nooses around their necks... The main percussionist played a MEAT SMOKER as a drum... Another 2 members, who were stationed on either side of the stage behind impressive vintage wooden organ shells that had new electronic keyboards installed in them, wore black robes and impressive peaked hoods. Only the vocalist appeared without a costume as he sang and alternately played guitar and banjo. To be honest, after my reaction to the self-indulgent Puscifer production the other night, I was bracing myself to be underwhelmed by Munly & the Lupercalians.
To my complete surprise, they were GREAT!! Their set was the most purely musical performance I've seen all year; a hypnotic combination of Folk, Country, and even some Goth with the costumes actually adding to the dense atmosphere of the songs. It was like taking a ride down a dark road at night with only one headlight working and the AM radio stuck on the same station.. I was completely caught up in their tales and vibe... as was Jello, who stood front and center their entire set. Afterwards I went straight to the merch table to buy their CD... only to be told they haven't released one yet! However the band's leader, Munly, has released 4 albums on AT over the past decade... so I guess I better play catch up with his work now... and, much to my surprise, Munly and his band were the perfect lead-in to the all out dark volume assault of Ludicra.
It had been just over 2 months since I last saw Ludicra and in that time they've completed work on their highly anticipated new album. The stage lights were dimmed for the entire set and the local Metal heroes played an amazingly brutal 5 song / 45 minute slot that included 3 of the new tracks.. This was a performance that I can't fully describe using mere words... Ludicra are such a well-oiled force of nature onstage that it's beyond comprehension why they're not more well known outside of the Bay Area... At least 3x after a song I said "AMAZING!" out loud to no one in particular; it was easily one of the best sets I've seen all year. As she handed me the setlist afterwards, Laurie explained that the new songs were referred to in "numbered code". Hmm... METAL.
Within the limitations of the English language, the only thing that comes close to expressing how I felt about Ludicra's set is "FUCKING LUDICRA!!!"... The Bay Area has one of the most vibrant underground Metal scenes in the world and Ludicra are the headliners, but it was funny that aside from the band there were only 5-6 other card carrying Metalheads in the crowd.
As I said earlier, this show was not crowded at all... However, it didn't make the event "sad". It simply didn't matter how many people were in the room, because everyone was there for the right reason: FOR THE MUSIC... you could sense it.. well at least I could.
When Jello took the stage to host his party you could tell he had the same attitude... and the set that followed was every bit as great as his 50th Birthday Celebration had been in this same room last year. I can't remember the last time I was right up front for a show, but there I was and it was damn FUN.. Jello weaved, bobbed, and mugged his way around the stage as he and the band (led by Victim's Family guitar ace Ralph Spight on ripping lead axe..) ran through some great and inspired new songs and also some Dead Kennedys nuggets like 'Bleed For Me' (which featured Jello in the crowd), 'California Über Alles', and 'Holiday In Cambodia'.
This show transported Umlaut back to my formative years when it didn't matter how many people were in whatever club or dive bar I found myself in seeing a band ... All that mattered is that we were all there for the same reason and we (both the crowd AND the bands) let ourselves get caught up in the vibe and the volume. If it had been a different show I might have regretted not going to one of the other gigs in town... but I regretted NOTHING on this night and I know the members of the Umlaut Nation who were with me felt the same way (a shout out to Timo, Johnny, Photo Ray, and Tscam)! It was cool to look around at friends and strangers and we were all grinning from ear to ear and having a blast.
On one hand it was a shame that this quintessential "only in San Francisco" event was overshadowed attendance-wise by out of town touring bands. However, in this case size simply didn't matter. The spirit of the S.F. Music Scene, past and present, was alive and well in the Great American and it was a joyous and raucous thing.. It also reminded me how much I love my hometown and how fortunate I was to have grown up and become a Music Geek in The Bay Area.
I didn't do a merch audit, but AT was selling vinyl albums for only $10 a pop! Old Skool! On the way back to the car, some pimply-faced teenagers called us fags. I'm still a little buzzed from the FUN of this show.. and instead of going out tonight I think I'm going to stay in and finally watch Milk... San Francisco Über Alles!
Featuring Jello Biafra & The Guantanamo School of Medicine / Ludicra / Munly & the Lupercalians
Great American Music Hall, San Francisco
November 6, 2009
This was Night #2 of Alternative Tentacles' 3-Night 30th Anniversary celebration with each night featuring Jello as headliner with his most recent band (The Guantanamo School Of Medicine) supported by different AT bands. I would love to have seen Alice Donut and Victim's Family on the final night, but since Umlaut had to choose I of course got a ticket to the night when the mighty Ludicra were on the bill.
However, for the 3rd gig in a row the attendance at this show was shockingly small; as with Rob Zombie and Puscifer *something* kept the crowds away... and in the case of tonight I would bet that *something* was there was simply too much going on in San Francisco, with a packed Dinosaur Jr. show across town at The Fillmore and a sold out Devo show only a couple of blocks away at The Regency. However, whereas the small crowds at the Zombie and Puscifer shows had been a negative distraction to me, it was the complete opposite for Jello's party. The small crowd actually added to the positive, special quality of the night... and this was quite simply THE MOST FUN show of the year!! No shit.
We arrived in time to see the awkwardly named Munly & the Lupercalians and I felt a bit dubious about them as they walked onstage because they looked bizarre: 5 members... 4 of them wearing hoods... 2 of the members (the percussionists) wore execution style hoods with nooses around their necks... The main percussionist played a MEAT SMOKER as a drum... Another 2 members, who were stationed on either side of the stage behind impressive vintage wooden organ shells that had new electronic keyboards installed in them, wore black robes and impressive peaked hoods. Only the vocalist appeared without a costume as he sang and alternately played guitar and banjo. To be honest, after my reaction to the self-indulgent Puscifer production the other night, I was bracing myself to be underwhelmed by Munly & the Lupercalians.
To my complete surprise, they were GREAT!! Their set was the most purely musical performance I've seen all year; a hypnotic combination of Folk, Country, and even some Goth with the costumes actually adding to the dense atmosphere of the songs. It was like taking a ride down a dark road at night with only one headlight working and the AM radio stuck on the same station.. I was completely caught up in their tales and vibe... as was Jello, who stood front and center their entire set. Afterwards I went straight to the merch table to buy their CD... only to be told they haven't released one yet! However the band's leader, Munly, has released 4 albums on AT over the past decade... so I guess I better play catch up with his work now... and, much to my surprise, Munly and his band were the perfect lead-in to the all out dark volume assault of Ludicra.It had been just over 2 months since I last saw Ludicra and in that time they've completed work on their highly anticipated new album. The stage lights were dimmed for the entire set and the local Metal heroes played an amazingly brutal 5 song / 45 minute slot that included 3 of the new tracks.. This was a performance that I can't fully describe using mere words... Ludicra are such a well-oiled force of nature onstage that it's beyond comprehension why they're not more well known outside of the Bay Area... At least 3x after a song I said "AMAZING!" out loud to no one in particular; it was easily one of the best sets I've seen all year. As she handed me the setlist afterwards, Laurie explained that the new songs were referred to in "numbered code". Hmm... METAL.
Within the limitations of the English language, the only thing that comes close to expressing how I felt about Ludicra's set is "FUCKING LUDICRA!!!"... The Bay Area has one of the most vibrant underground Metal scenes in the world and Ludicra are the headliners, but it was funny that aside from the band there were only 5-6 other card carrying Metalheads in the crowd.As I said earlier, this show was not crowded at all... However, it didn't make the event "sad". It simply didn't matter how many people were in the room, because everyone was there for the right reason: FOR THE MUSIC... you could sense it.. well at least I could.
When Jello took the stage to host his party you could tell he had the same attitude... and the set that followed was every bit as great as his 50th Birthday Celebration had been in this same room last year. I can't remember the last time I was right up front for a show, but there I was and it was damn FUN.. Jello weaved, bobbed, and mugged his way around the stage as he and the band (led by Victim's Family guitar ace Ralph Spight on ripping lead axe..) ran through some great and inspired new songs and also some Dead Kennedys nuggets like 'Bleed For Me' (which featured Jello in the crowd), 'California Über Alles', and 'Holiday In Cambodia'.
This show transported Umlaut back to my formative years when it didn't matter how many people were in whatever club or dive bar I found myself in seeing a band ... All that mattered is that we were all there for the same reason and we (both the crowd AND the bands) let ourselves get caught up in the vibe and the volume. If it had been a different show I might have regretted not going to one of the other gigs in town... but I regretted NOTHING on this night and I know the members of the Umlaut Nation who were with me felt the same way (a shout out to Timo, Johnny, Photo Ray, and Tscam)! It was cool to look around at friends and strangers and we were all grinning from ear to ear and having a blast.
On one hand it was a shame that this quintessential "only in San Francisco" event was overshadowed attendance-wise by out of town touring bands. However, in this case size simply didn't matter. The spirit of the S.F. Music Scene, past and present, was alive and well in the Great American and it was a joyous and raucous thing.. It also reminded me how much I love my hometown and how fortunate I was to have grown up and become a Music Geek in The Bay Area.
I didn't do a merch audit, but AT was selling vinyl albums for only $10 a pop! Old Skool! On the way back to the car, some pimply-faced teenagers called us fags. I'm still a little buzzed from the FUN of this show.. and instead of going out tonight I think I'm going to stay in and finally watch Milk... San Francisco Über Alles!
Thursday, November 05, 2009
Cult Of Personality
Puscifer / Uncle Scratch's Gospel Revival
The Fox Theater, Oakland, CA
November 4, 2009
Umlaut has been going to Metal shows almost exclusively this year for one reason or another... so I was looking forward to this show since it would be something completely different.. and it was... for better or worse.
For the newbies: Puscifer is a side project of Maynard Keenan of Tool. The last time I saw Maynard onstage was around the corner at The Paramount when Tool played there in 2006. I basically knew nothing about Puscifer prior to the show, other than Tim Alexander of Primus is one of the drummers. According to Wikipedia, the band's original name was "Umlaut".. Hmmm.
I'm going to break with form here and say I'm simply not motivated to write about Puscifer. It's not that I disliked the music... On the contrary I didn't mind the music at all and I'm a fan of Maynard's vocals... BUT I was not engaged by the presentation at all. I kind of got it.. it was theater... it was social commentary... etc. etc... I simply wasn't in the mood to invest that much effort in it. This is completely 100% on me. Instead of trying to rationalize why I didn't like Puscifer's performance, I'll simply refer you to a positive and informed Puscifer review by Umlaut Nation friend Hard Rock Chick and move on.
The reason I was even at the show was because Uncle Scratch's Gospel Revival (USGR) put me on their guest list via Umlaut Nation and USGR friend Jim (Hey Jim!). USGR are the duo of Brother Eddie and Brother Ant from Cleveland who "preach" the gospel with a wreckless punk rock-like abandon. They remind me of Doo Rag in how they perform low-fi music through low-fi instruments; a USGR motto taped to Ant's cardboard drum kit said "Low Fi On and Jesus High". Ant plays a beaten up Telecaster through tiny amps and Eddie plays "drums" on an amazing combination of cardboard barrels, a snare drum, a cymbal, and an old metal milk crate in place of a hi-hat. Ant sings through a shitty mic and Eddie does backing vocals and addresses the crowd through a megaphone via junky microphones attached to either a harmonica holder around his neck or on a vintage football helmet. Evidently Maynard absolutely loves USGR and he handpicked them to open this tour and they also appear onstage during Puscifer's set.
As we approached The Fox, USGR were out in front *protesting* the show and railing against the "evils" of Rock Music. It was pretty funny, but at the time I didn't realize that most of the crowd thought Brother Ed was Maynard; evidently Maynard appears in a recent Puscifer video and *looks* and acts similar to Brother Ed. I haven't seen the video, but thus began my evening amongst The Cult Of Maynard...
Umlaut with Brother Ant and Brother Ed of Uncle Scratch's Gospel Revival
(Pic by Photo Ray)
Not long after entering the venue I realized how many people had thought Brother Ed was Maynard when I overheard ALOT of people saying a variation of "Yeah! Maynard was out front harrassing people!" etc. etc. Bizarre... but since I'm not completely versed in Puscifer I didn't know just how plausible this was to The Cult Of Maynard.
Later, after USGR's inspirational set, the Brother Ed > Maynard misidentification continued when the guys sitting to my right were raving about how "crazy" Maynard had been onstage... I felt like saying something, but I didn't. Then at the bar another guy was CONVINCED that Maynard was the drummer in USGR (Trivia: Evidently Maynard plays drums... I had no idea..) and when I attempted to explain that USGR are really a band from Cleveland he cut me off and said something like "Man, I'm a HUGE Maynard fan... and I KNOW that was him... and despite what you're saying I WANT to believe that it was him..." I kind of looked at him and thought "Ooookaaay, koo koo for Coco Puffs..." It's not like we were talking about Motörhead so I let it go. "I WANT to believe that it was him..." The Cult Of Maynard.
However, when Puscifer's set began I thought the joke was on ME! After a brief film introduction featuring Maynard as a General, Brother Ant and Brother Ed came onstage to address the crowd... and for a couple of minutes I thought that maybe I had been kept in the dark about Ed's "true" identity, because in sunglasses and without a baseball cap he did look like Maynard... and even when Maynard made his entrance onstage it still wasn't clear because he was in costume wearing a funny comb-over wig while riding a Segway. It wasn't until the 3rd song of the set that I chilled out and realized Maynard was Maynard onstage when he finally revealed himself sans costume... and then a couple of songs later Brother Ant and Brother Ed came onstage again as part of the shows theatrics. Soon after that I got bored and bailed to join Photo Ray at the bar and the first thing I said to him was "METAL".
As we watched the last moments of the set from the bar, someone came up to me and said "Are you Brian?"... I didn't know who the guy was... but then I realized it was Brother Ed talking in his "normal" voice! It caught me completely off guard that he was out of character. Hilarious! He was soon joined by Ant and it was cool to chat with them about how USGR got hooked up with Maynard (he randomly saw them playing in a club in Arizona..) and how well he's been treating them since they're not used to "big Rock tours" like Puscifer's. Ed also told more tales about getting mistaken for Maynard and how trippy / funny that is.. When I asked Ed what they were going to do after the Puscifer tour he said "Go back to playing on the sidewalk in Cleveland.." AMEN! Uncle Scratch's Gospel Review are the best God Squad band since Stryper.
After show with Brother Ed... or is it Maynard?
If you had bought one of every Puscifer merch item you would have paid around $725 (!); they had ALOT of merch. On the way back to the car, some pimply-faced teenagers called us fags. It struck me this morning that parts of Puscifer's presentation (the parts I paid attention to..) addressed the "cult" theme that I experienced... Jesus' image on toast.. I'm sure there are some Maynard devotees who see his face in toast. Religion is anywhere you can find it I guess... I should have paid more attention to Puscifer... Oh well... cue Uncle Scratch's Gospel Review!
The Fox Theater, Oakland, CA
November 4, 2009
Umlaut has been going to Metal shows almost exclusively this year for one reason or another... so I was looking forward to this show since it would be something completely different.. and it was... for better or worse.
For the newbies: Puscifer is a side project of Maynard Keenan of Tool. The last time I saw Maynard onstage was around the corner at The Paramount when Tool played there in 2006. I basically knew nothing about Puscifer prior to the show, other than Tim Alexander of Primus is one of the drummers. According to Wikipedia, the band's original name was "Umlaut".. Hmmm.
I'm going to break with form here and say I'm simply not motivated to write about Puscifer. It's not that I disliked the music... On the contrary I didn't mind the music at all and I'm a fan of Maynard's vocals... BUT I was not engaged by the presentation at all. I kind of got it.. it was theater... it was social commentary... etc. etc... I simply wasn't in the mood to invest that much effort in it. This is completely 100% on me. Instead of trying to rationalize why I didn't like Puscifer's performance, I'll simply refer you to a positive and informed Puscifer review by Umlaut Nation friend Hard Rock Chick and move on.
The reason I was even at the show was because Uncle Scratch's Gospel Revival (USGR) put me on their guest list via Umlaut Nation and USGR friend Jim (Hey Jim!). USGR are the duo of Brother Eddie and Brother Ant from Cleveland who "preach" the gospel with a wreckless punk rock-like abandon. They remind me of Doo Rag in how they perform low-fi music through low-fi instruments; a USGR motto taped to Ant's cardboard drum kit said "Low Fi On and Jesus High". Ant plays a beaten up Telecaster through tiny amps and Eddie plays "drums" on an amazing combination of cardboard barrels, a snare drum, a cymbal, and an old metal milk crate in place of a hi-hat. Ant sings through a shitty mic and Eddie does backing vocals and addresses the crowd through a megaphone via junky microphones attached to either a harmonica holder around his neck or on a vintage football helmet. Evidently Maynard absolutely loves USGR and he handpicked them to open this tour and they also appear onstage during Puscifer's set.
As we approached The Fox, USGR were out in front *protesting* the show and railing against the "evils" of Rock Music. It was pretty funny, but at the time I didn't realize that most of the crowd thought Brother Ed was Maynard; evidently Maynard appears in a recent Puscifer video and *looks* and acts similar to Brother Ed. I haven't seen the video, but thus began my evening amongst The Cult Of Maynard...
Umlaut with Brother Ant and Brother Ed of Uncle Scratch's Gospel Revival(Pic by Photo Ray)
Not long after entering the venue I realized how many people had thought Brother Ed was Maynard when I overheard ALOT of people saying a variation of "Yeah! Maynard was out front harrassing people!" etc. etc. Bizarre... but since I'm not completely versed in Puscifer I didn't know just how plausible this was to The Cult Of Maynard.
Later, after USGR's inspirational set, the Brother Ed > Maynard misidentification continued when the guys sitting to my right were raving about how "crazy" Maynard had been onstage... I felt like saying something, but I didn't. Then at the bar another guy was CONVINCED that Maynard was the drummer in USGR (Trivia: Evidently Maynard plays drums... I had no idea..) and when I attempted to explain that USGR are really a band from Cleveland he cut me off and said something like "Man, I'm a HUGE Maynard fan... and I KNOW that was him... and despite what you're saying I WANT to believe that it was him..." I kind of looked at him and thought "Ooookaaay, koo koo for Coco Puffs..." It's not like we were talking about Motörhead so I let it go. "I WANT to believe that it was him..." The Cult Of Maynard.
However, when Puscifer's set began I thought the joke was on ME! After a brief film introduction featuring Maynard as a General, Brother Ant and Brother Ed came onstage to address the crowd... and for a couple of minutes I thought that maybe I had been kept in the dark about Ed's "true" identity, because in sunglasses and without a baseball cap he did look like Maynard... and even when Maynard made his entrance onstage it still wasn't clear because he was in costume wearing a funny comb-over wig while riding a Segway. It wasn't until the 3rd song of the set that I chilled out and realized Maynard was Maynard onstage when he finally revealed himself sans costume... and then a couple of songs later Brother Ant and Brother Ed came onstage again as part of the shows theatrics. Soon after that I got bored and bailed to join Photo Ray at the bar and the first thing I said to him was "METAL".
As we watched the last moments of the set from the bar, someone came up to me and said "Are you Brian?"... I didn't know who the guy was... but then I realized it was Brother Ed talking in his "normal" voice! It caught me completely off guard that he was out of character. Hilarious! He was soon joined by Ant and it was cool to chat with them about how USGR got hooked up with Maynard (he randomly saw them playing in a club in Arizona..) and how well he's been treating them since they're not used to "big Rock tours" like Puscifer's. Ed also told more tales about getting mistaken for Maynard and how trippy / funny that is.. When I asked Ed what they were going to do after the Puscifer tour he said "Go back to playing on the sidewalk in Cleveland.." AMEN! Uncle Scratch's Gospel Review are the best God Squad band since Stryper.
After show with Brother Ed... or is it Maynard?If you had bought one of every Puscifer merch item you would have paid around $725 (!); they had ALOT of merch. On the way back to the car, some pimply-faced teenagers called us fags. It struck me this morning that parts of Puscifer's presentation (the parts I paid attention to..) addressed the "cult" theme that I experienced... Jesus' image on toast.. I'm sure there are some Maynard devotees who see his face in toast. Religion is anywhere you can find it I guess... I should have paid more attention to Puscifer... Oh well... cue Uncle Scratch's Gospel Review!
Wednesday, November 04, 2009
Half Empty Half Full
Rob Zombie
San Jose State Event Center, San Jose, CA
November 3, 2009
Prior to this show Umlaut's afternoon unfolded like this: Bought the limited edition version of the new Slayer album on the day of release > hellacious rush hour traffic going towards San Jose > coffee pit stop (latte!) > my favorite old skool San Jose taqueria (Super Taq!) > easy free street parking 2 blocks from the venue.
I was into White Zombie for awhile back in The Day (Remember when they played the DNA Lounge? Me too..) but after Rob Zombie went solo I became more of a fan of his style rather than his music.. I like his whole Horror aesthetic alot, but I can only say I like maybe 3 of his solo songs.. maybe 2. The only reason I wanted to attend this show was to see what kind of extravagant show Zombie would stage... However, the overriding thought in my head going in was how this was the 2nd time in 2 weeks I was visiting the Event Center for a gig after having only been to the venue once in the previous 14 years (!). Remember when White Zombie headlined the Event Center in 1995 with Babes In Toyland and the Melvins supporting? Me too.
As we entered the venue, the next thought in my head was "Wow, this place is really empty..".. and it really was empty! Unlike the sold out Slipknot show a couple of weeks ago, the bleachers of the Event Center had been pulled out to fill up as much of the floor as possible and 1/4 of the seats on either side of the stage were blocked off by curtains; sure signs of *light* ticket sales. However, even with these optical illusions in place, it was obvious the Event Center attendance was not ideal; my guess is around 2,500 in the 7,000 capacity space, which surprised me. It was empty to the point where they were actually taking down 1 of the only 2 merchandise stands BEFORE the headliner came on because the lobby was basically a ghost town... and the show was so empty an usher AND a supervisor guarded a pile of vomit while a mop was retrieved...
WTF!? Guarding a pile of vomit?! This was a CONCERT for dog's sake, not a mall! Vomit is a concert hazard that dates back to the dawn of time, but that's the kind of slow night it was at the Event Center. Also, there were literally no kids in the audience! I know it was a school night, but it was still very weird and it gave me the feeling that I was at a Classic Rock show... with an *older* act whose best creative days musically are in the past playing for an *older* audience wanting to spend an evening reliving their past.
That being said, Rob Zombie and his band know how to work a crowd and John 5 is one of my favorite guitarists to watch perform. The stage production featured cool video graphics, the familiar 10-foot robot from past tours during 'More Human Than A Human', and raised box platforms at the front of the stage that Zombie, John 5, and bassist Piggy D. used constantly to interact with the front row and beyond... and, despite several problems with his mic during the first half of the set, Zombie's onstage charisma is still undeniable.
Now, with that being said, despite the charisma and the confidence, Zombie has always lacked songs... There, I said it. The majority of his songs tend to have that same electro-rhythm sample running through them that makes the songs more *Dance* than *Metal*, which I guess is the whole idea. Eventhough this was my 3rd time seeing him solo since White Zombie disbanded, to my ears Zombie's songs sound dated here in the 21st Century. I just kept thinking how this was Classic Rock for the Affliction crowd now... Although it was funny watching how old hits like 'Living Dead Girl' and 'Dragula' seemed to make all the women around me, and some of the guys, want to jump on the nearest stripper pole.
It's interesting that for most of the past decade, Zombie has become more well-known because of his films rather than his music... and I think the attendance tonight reflected this change of focus. It actually might be a relevant career move for Zombie to follow the Anvil live model and stage shows that feature a screening of one of his movies followed by a live performance by Rob Zombie: Rock Star. I'm not saying that Umlaut would pay to see that, but it would be a credible way for him to combine his two worlds so he's not playing in front of a half empty college gymnasium again.
If you bought one of every Rob Zombie merch item you would have paid around $420. On the way back to the car, some pimply-faced teenagers called us fags. Given the number of great shows Umlaut has seen this year to date, I have to say this was not one of them... but it was still an extremely easy and fun night... and ultimately that's all that matters... AND I had the new Slayer album to listen to on the drive home!
San Jose State Event Center, San Jose, CA
November 3, 2009
Prior to this show Umlaut's afternoon unfolded like this: Bought the limited edition version of the new Slayer album on the day of release > hellacious rush hour traffic going towards San Jose > coffee pit stop (latte!) > my favorite old skool San Jose taqueria (Super Taq!) > easy free street parking 2 blocks from the venue.
I was into White Zombie for awhile back in The Day (Remember when they played the DNA Lounge? Me too..) but after Rob Zombie went solo I became more of a fan of his style rather than his music.. I like his whole Horror aesthetic alot, but I can only say I like maybe 3 of his solo songs.. maybe 2. The only reason I wanted to attend this show was to see what kind of extravagant show Zombie would stage... However, the overriding thought in my head going in was how this was the 2nd time in 2 weeks I was visiting the Event Center for a gig after having only been to the venue once in the previous 14 years (!). Remember when White Zombie headlined the Event Center in 1995 with Babes In Toyland and the Melvins supporting? Me too.
As we entered the venue, the next thought in my head was "Wow, this place is really empty..".. and it really was empty! Unlike the sold out Slipknot show a couple of weeks ago, the bleachers of the Event Center had been pulled out to fill up as much of the floor as possible and 1/4 of the seats on either side of the stage were blocked off by curtains; sure signs of *light* ticket sales. However, even with these optical illusions in place, it was obvious the Event Center attendance was not ideal; my guess is around 2,500 in the 7,000 capacity space, which surprised me. It was empty to the point where they were actually taking down 1 of the only 2 merchandise stands BEFORE the headliner came on because the lobby was basically a ghost town... and the show was so empty an usher AND a supervisor guarded a pile of vomit while a mop was retrieved...
WTF!? Guarding a pile of vomit?! This was a CONCERT for dog's sake, not a mall! Vomit is a concert hazard that dates back to the dawn of time, but that's the kind of slow night it was at the Event Center. Also, there were literally no kids in the audience! I know it was a school night, but it was still very weird and it gave me the feeling that I was at a Classic Rock show... with an *older* act whose best creative days musically are in the past playing for an *older* audience wanting to spend an evening reliving their past.That being said, Rob Zombie and his band know how to work a crowd and John 5 is one of my favorite guitarists to watch perform. The stage production featured cool video graphics, the familiar 10-foot robot from past tours during 'More Human Than A Human', and raised box platforms at the front of the stage that Zombie, John 5, and bassist Piggy D. used constantly to interact with the front row and beyond... and, despite several problems with his mic during the first half of the set, Zombie's onstage charisma is still undeniable.
Now, with that being said, despite the charisma and the confidence, Zombie has always lacked songs... There, I said it. The majority of his songs tend to have that same electro-rhythm sample running through them that makes the songs more *Dance* than *Metal*, which I guess is the whole idea. Eventhough this was my 3rd time seeing him solo since White Zombie disbanded, to my ears Zombie's songs sound dated here in the 21st Century. I just kept thinking how this was Classic Rock for the Affliction crowd now... Although it was funny watching how old hits like 'Living Dead Girl' and 'Dragula' seemed to make all the women around me, and some of the guys, want to jump on the nearest stripper pole.
It's interesting that for most of the past decade, Zombie has become more well-known because of his films rather than his music... and I think the attendance tonight reflected this change of focus. It actually might be a relevant career move for Zombie to follow the Anvil live model and stage shows that feature a screening of one of his movies followed by a live performance by Rob Zombie: Rock Star. I'm not saying that Umlaut would pay to see that, but it would be a credible way for him to combine his two worlds so he's not playing in front of a half empty college gymnasium again.
If you bought one of every Rob Zombie merch item you would have paid around $420. On the way back to the car, some pimply-faced teenagers called us fags. Given the number of great shows Umlaut has seen this year to date, I have to say this was not one of them... but it was still an extremely easy and fun night... and ultimately that's all that matters... AND I had the new Slayer album to listen to on the drive home!
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