Velvet Revolver
The Warfield, San Francisco
June 7, 2004
They should call this band Zero Body Fat. I say forget Atkins. Get on whatever junk Scott Weiland was / is on if you wanna fit into that summer swimsuit.. or if you wanna be able to slide yourself through a mail slot.
It's nice to see hats back in rock: Scott Weiland's SS style commandant chapeau and Slash's trademark top hat added an Old World sensibility to the Lock 'N Loll madness. When Slash donned the top hat for the encores I thought to myself "I can't remember the last time I saw A HAT getting a crowd reaction like this.." Such is the magic of Rock Stars. They can turn the world on with their smile. They can take a nothing day and suddenly make it all seem worthwhile.
I also couldn't remember the last time I saw a front man lean over the crowd and a chick grabbing a handful of his goods. I hope that's covered by Rock Star workman's comp, dude.
On the way back to the car some pimply faced teenagers called me a fag. Beer count = None. Number of guys wearing crushed velvet vests = 1. The band members were all wearing pants that you probably couldn't buy off the rack at Macy's.
Back in the 20th Century, ümlaut was a xeroxed fanzine that existed from 1992-95. Despite limited distribution, loyal readers ranged from coast to coast and included Rock Stars of various credibility, including Neurosis, Sonic Youth, Melvins, and Metallica. This 21st Century version of ümlaut has been ranting since 2004 and is also the co-author of the book Murder In The Front Row.