A Year Ago Today

Someone once said to me how The Bay Area needed to stop "holding on" to the old Murder In The Front Row days and we needed to "move on" and "get over it".  Yes, they were historic times, but that was then and this is now, and we're living in the past blah blah.  For the record, this person was not from The Bay Area.

All I can say is for me personally I am not "holding on" to those days; THEY are holding on to ME.  Over the years many things and events have happened to me as a direct result of those old Murder In The Front Row days.  I am not religious, but there is a karma / mojo thing out there.  Here's an example that happened exactly one year ago today:

At the end of October last year I received a layoff notice from a business I had been a part of for almost 10 years.  Shit happens, things were changing.  I got it and I understood the reasons... but it did not lesson the feeling of dread of "What the fuck am I going to do now??"  I've been through layoffs before and they are never easy but somehow I've always found myself landing somewhere.  The last time I was laid off I literally didn't work for a year and that memory weighed on my mind.. because how often can lightning strike?  I am not a "career" person and I've never followed any kind of defined or traditional career path.  However, sometimes the Metal Godz work in mysterious ways.

Randomly, and only a few days after my layoff notice, an old acquaintance posted something on his social media.  I had met this guy a few years before when we met about possibly doing a collaboration between his company and bands who were clients of my old company.  Unfortunately, nothing panned out but we stayed in touch over the years.

His post was about how he had found a bunch of old Punk and Metal fanzines at a local flea market and one of them caught my eye and pulled me straight back to the Murder In The Front Row days. One of the 'zines he found was a 1986 issue of the legendary San Francisco 'zine Metal Mania done by my old friend Ron Quintana.  I had contributed to Metal Mania and I have all of the issues except one... and that one issue was part of this flea market find!  The issue is Ron's tribute issue to Cliff Burton after he passed away.  Only 500 copies were xeroxed and stapled together back in those sad days after Cliff was gone.

The copy even had a Record Vault price tag on it!

Anyway, long story short, I sent my acquaintance a message and asked if he could possibly scan or copy that Metal Mania for me.  However, in true old school fashion he offered to give it to me!  WOW, right?!  No ego.  No greed.  Old school.   Also, one thing led to another and I mentioned my current job situation, which I really didn't think anything more about at the time.

Fast forward and it had only been 16 days since I received my layoff notice and I was invited to the office of my old acquaintance for lunch and (as far as I knew) to pick up the old copy of Metal Mania.  We went across the street to a place to eat and I was prepared to have a mellow conversation catching up about things... but instead the conversation was about how he wanted to bring me on board with his company.  They didn't have a specific role yet but they could work with me to figure something out.

Damn.

The gist of the conversation was that he believed shit happens for a reason.  My recent layoff, him finding that old issue of Metal Mania, and me contacting him about it felt like something was aligning.  His company was about to start growing due to new partnerships and he needed to ramp up his office staff with professional and qualified humans.  It was a fucking amazing lunch and one of those moments where my life literally changed unexpectedly.

Long story short, it took a few months for the company to be in a position to formally offer me a position.  However, in that time I was able to consult for a certain band on their webstore and I basically worked for them for a month at their Marin County HQ.  This was surreal in a full circle way and it was ironic running into The Frontman at the office and talking about Venom in front of his other employees.

Which brings me to today and it being exactly 365 days since that fateful lunch in San Francisco.  I now find myself working for an old Skate Punk and his company Super7 and our office feels like a secret club house instead of a traditional workplace.  I feel part of a gang and we're taking on the world... and we are in many ways.. and it's about to go next level for us in a good way. 

As I said earlier, shit happens.  Sometimes shit happens for a reason.. and sometimes things that were put into motion 30 years ago involving bands and a local music scene can still affect my life in a very real time, modern way.. and that's exactly what happened a year ago today.  It's almost like the ghosts from the Murder In The Front Row days are looking out for me.. which is comforting in a Metal way.

Bonded by Blood!

Hell Freezes Over

Those who have known me since the Reagan Administration understand that Ron Quintana's 80's fanzine Metal Mania, with its combination of humor and Music Geek ranting, was a profound influence on Umlaut's aesthetic and attitude (Thanks Ron!).

In subsequent years, Metal Mania kinda begat Mike Meals' Poser ... which led to Ron and Mike running into each other Reese's Peanut Butter Cup-style in recent years to create N.C. Music Monthly.

Like a rash that's intrusive but pleasant to scratch, N.C. Music Monthly has been the 4" x 5" friend that's been thrust into my hand at shows or crawled into my mailbox... It's been a cool reminder of simpler, cut 'n paste, xeroxed, non-digital times... until now.

Ladies and Gentlemen, Hell has frozen over: N.C. Music Monthly is now online!!

Click HERE to experience the glory and start getting prepared for The Rapture 'cause it's gotta be coming now.

Congratulations to Mike and Ron for convincing the Nevada County Arts Council to let them park in a space on their plot of the Information Superhighway. Now the world can enjoy the wonder that is the Grass Valley Police / Nevada County Sheriff Crime Blotter!

Anvil Chorus

In preparation for the Curtis Grant Benefit next week here in San Francisco:

Anvil Chorus were local legends in the early-80's and part of the NWOSFHM (!). They shared the stage with the likes of Motörhead, Yngwie Mamsteen (even serving as his backing band for a show), Exodus, and Metallica amongst others.

Here are some old Anvil Chorus ads from the Chris J. Archives:

San Jose State, CA - Nov. 20, 1982

Wolfgang's, San Francisco - Jan. 11, 1983

The Kabuki, San Francisco - Dec. 26, 1984

Pretty cool, innit? Umlaut was at that Hughes-Thrall show. It was the day after Judas Priest played at the Cow Palace on the Screaming For Vengeance Tour, which explains why I'm wearing a Screaming For Vengeance tour shirt in this photo from the show:

(Photo by Bill Hale)

Yes, I was 12-years old at the time and I still have the guitar pic that Pat Thrall handed to me. Dude, Tommy Aldridge playing in a college's student union ballroom! I was also introduced to Brad (Night Ranger) Gillis at this show; he was kind of a dick. Night Ranger sucked anyway.

Music Geek Trivia: Nine days after this show, Metallica headlined for the first time in San Francisco... and 10 days after this show Anvil Chorus shared the stage with Metallica and Exodus at The Mabuhay Gardens in S.F.. Yep, the S.F. Scene ruled back then, man.

The Yngwie / Anvil Chorus show was epic and also featured Exodus on the bill... but I wasn't at that Armored Saint show, probably because it was the day after Christmas and I was playing with my new toys.

Anyway, here are some old Anvil Chorus clippings from the Umlaut Archives:

Metal Mania #7 (Fall 1982)

Metal Mania #8

Metal Mania #8

Kerrang #33 (January 1983)

A decade or so after Anvil Chorus, keyboardist Gere Fenellie joined Redd Kross. It was one of those classic Music Geek coincidences 'cause Redd Kross is one of Umlaut's all-time favorite bands; I was rather geeked out about it:

Umlaut #10 (Fall 1994)

Next week's show is going to be very special... See y'all there!


BLUE FLAMES!

Motörhead

Submitted by Lori Acid King:

Motörhead / Corrosion Of Conformity / Zeke
The Warfield, San Francisco
April 8, 2005

Robin bought me a ticket to the show for my b-day and I was pretty excited. I hadn't been to The Warfield in a long time. I took the BART from my house to meet Robin at 9pm. Left at 8:30pm, missed a train, had to wait till 8:59pm to catch the next one to the Civic Center. Just 2 blocks from The Warfield with a nice walk down the shadiest part of S.F., passing street people drinking beer in bags and the various XXX venues, but hell I still made it there at freaking 9:10pm!!

I walked in and Robin and I were trying to find each other via our cell phones inside The Warfield! We hooked up, got a 12oz beer for $5.50, and COC took the stage. What timing I tell you. We obviously never planned on seeing the openers (sorry Zeke and whoever the other band was)!

COC played mostly new songs and only a few of the old ones. The crowd was totally into them but, me being me, I have to comment on their weight, age, and clothes! Woody has packed on some pounds and just cut the sleeves off of a bigger jean shirt! Dude, long sleeves please!! It's not Rock to watch some unfit rocker playing with flabby triceps flapping in the wind! Pepper has grown a big and bushy beard that has some grey in it making him look like Charlton Heston in The 10 Commandments!! They did sound great and it was good to see them again after so many years. I need to buy the new CD. No James Hetfield lovefest this time around :)

An old acquaintance, Lane who used to work at Man's Ruin, was bartending and gave us 2 drinks for $5!! Woooho. Felt like I won the slots! Motörhead came on and the crowd was so much better than the last time I saw them at the Avalon Ballroom a few years back with The Dwarves and High On Fire. There was just much more energy. I was excited when they came on but, as usual, when they started playing all their new songs my beer buzz was losing its edge and I started to get tired and antsy.

They played a lot of new songs and a few classics. Sorry Lemmy, but when you introduce a song as an honor to the Ramones and then go on to say "don't use guns" when none of the band died from gun shot wounds you really need to re-write that speech! Not that the mostly black pegged leg, white gym shoe crowd even knows or cares, but I did!

They also played 'Killed By Death' where Mickey Dee did his freaking 2 day long drum solo! The boys looked good. Always the same, aging well and discovered hair dye. We left after the last song. I could not bear to hear 'Ace of Spades' for an encore.

Robin and I went out for late night sushi and I walked down to Mission Street and 5th and waited for the 14 at 1:30am!! I missed the BART. Quite a bunch of colorful characters on the bus I must say. Made it home by 1:51am and missed the rain!

A successful night! Thanks Robin!

Beer Count - 2
Sake - 3 small cups!

Submitted by Robin:

A Dudefest, to be sure. But it's always a lot of fun to see that type of crowd in all their Metal "finery"... My vodka tonics were 99% tonic, but what the hell! Lori forgot to mention the $50 hoodies at the merch table, and the utter and complete lack of any girl-friendly sizings. Their loss, man! Their loss!

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Umlaut's Motörhead Flashback:

Umlaut has tripped the light fandango with Motörhead since he was 17, but he came to the realization awhile back that he doesn't need to see them again.. However, he does have fond memories and 'Stone Dead Forever' is still one of his all-time favorite songs.

"It's been a long time, it's been a long long wait, and you caught your fingers in the Pearly Gates..."

Guns 'N Roses / Metallica / Motörhead - The Rose Bowl, Pasadena, CA - Oct. 3, 1992
The first time I'd seen Motörhead in 8 years.. A 30 minute set that concluded with Slash jamming with them on some blues rock number. BORING. Three years passed before I bothered seeing them again.. and after that it was another 8 years until my most recent Motörhead encounter in 2003.. which was only slightly less boring than 1992. Oh well, I did like Lemmy's song with Probot.

Motörhead / Mercyful Fate / Exciter - The Warfield, S.F. - Nov. 20, 1984

One of THE best shows ever! This was back when The Warfield's main floor still had theater seating from its original incarnation as a movie theater. Mercyful Fate were on their debut U.S. Tour and had headlined two legendary shows only a month before in Sacramento and S.F.. During Fate's set the crowd stormed down to the front, flooding the aisles and climbing over the rows of seats to get closer. METAL! At one point I was knocked off my feet while standing in the aisle and fell across several chairs. For a second I was scared someone was going to come diving on top of me and crush my legs on the hardwood arms of the chairs. Motörhead had their bomber lighting rig and during their set some of the chairs in the front row were ripped out of the floor and thrown onstage. METAL!! I still have a clear memory of Andy Anderson climbing up onto the speaker stacks and diving off. After the show I remember wandering around down front surveying the damage. Almost the entire front row of theater chairs were either damaged or gone with only splinters of wood and bolts remaining in the floor. Because of the damage, The Warfield didn't host another Metal show again until 1987. METAL!!!

Metal Mania #13 - 1983

Motörhead - The Stone, S.F. - August 13, 1983
They played 3 consecutive nights in the Bay Area (Palo Alto, Berkeley, S.F.) and I raged at two of them. At The Stone, Lemmy was hanging out at the bar. Someone dared me to go talk to him. I had heard the band weren't playing 'Overkill' on this tour. With youthful bravado I walked up to Lemmy and asked him why they weren't playing 'Overkill'. His reply was "We forgot how to play it.." Thinking back now I guess I'm lucky Lemmy simply didn't punch me for asking such a stupid question. According to a review I wrote back then, they encored with a double shot of 'Shoot You In The Back' > 'The Chase Is Better Than The Catch'. Wayne took some good photos at this gig but I can't find them right now.

Metal Mania #7 - 1982

Iron Fist Tour - S.F. - June 1982
Fast Eddie had quit Motörhead only 19 days before these 2 S.F. shows (one with Krokus @ The Warfield and the next night headlining The Old Waldorf). Brian 'Thin Lizzy' Robertson was a VERY quick replacement and a friend sent me photos from the Chicago show (May 22nd @ The Aragon), which was the 2nd show with the new lineup.. I can't remember why I didn't make these gigs.. I had a car and a job. Hmmm.

Metal Mania #1 - 1981

Motörhead Mauls America
by Ron Quintana
(originally published in Metal Mania #1)

Motörhead Mauls America: Mayhem Merchants Sack The States!!!!!!!!!!!!!

8:30, July 5th, Santa Cruz Civic Auditorium. The lights dim, Metalurgists charge the stage and then the eerie "Good, Bad and the Ugly" theme song gets crushed by 140 million decibels of 'Ace Of Spades'.

It's Motörhead (!) at last in America!!!!!!!!! Lemmy, Eddie, and Philthy run through some ALL-time classic HEAVY songs like 'Leaving Here', 'Capricorn', and the thundering 'Overkill'. The 'Head also blast through half the songs off of 'Ace Of Spades' because it's the only album of their's to be released here yet, but all of the TRUE HEADBANGERS HAVE THEIR OTHER ALBUMS (at least on tape) and are singing along with Lemmy.

Motörheadbangers in full gear (denim, patches, leather and spikes) show the laid-back Sabbath fans how to really enjoy Heavy Metal by Headbanging! Unfortunately, Motörhead didn't play an encore ("As a courtesy to Ozzy") and Blizzard of Ozz were a disappointment as Ozzy didn't get very crazed like he had done the day before at Day On The Green (DoG #1) in front of 50,000 people. Randy Rhoads' guitar ran rings around Fast Eddie's, but Ozzy's material is rather weak and his voice sounded strained. Barely 1,500 Metalheads made it to the half-filled Santa Cruz Civic concert and despite Bill Graham's Goons and a police station a block away it was THE heaviest night of the year. Later, we talked with Eddie and Lemmy, who were real friendly, and surprised at their popularity here (and all over America).

After the Santa Cruz show Lemmy & Co. expressed concern that the Old Waldorf's sound system wouldn't be loud enough for the 'Head, but luckily, they were able to borrow B.O.C.'s equipment from their concert the night before (AND IT STILL WASN'T LOUD ENOUGH!!!!!!!!!)

Early in the morning, 3 days later, a line began to form outside The Old Waldorf in San Francisco. It was the True Partyers! Set for an afternoon of drinking and an evening of snorting and headbanging with the World's Heaviest Band. Just before the doors were opened, Lemmy, Eddie, and Philthy came outside for some autograph signing. We asked whether they were going to play ZZ Top's 'Beer Drinkers and Hell Raisers' (which they had played during their soundcheck) but Eddie said he'd screwed up on part of it, so they dropped it from their set.

Lemmy promised an hour and a half show (because they were headlining - luckily) of Rock & Roll, and they delivered with a vengeance! The Animal hammered away as Lemmy threw in lots of lead bass runs and Eddie's rapid fire riffs triggered headbanging and earthshaking on a scale reminiscent of that San Andreas Fault shift back in 1906. Lemmy and crew poured out pure molten Metal as they ripped through their set which included gems like 'Metropolis' and the atomic 'Bomber' encore.

Too bad they didn't have their huge Bomber lighting rig, but they said they'd be back in October in the States on tour again and they would have it. Right after the concert Motörhead had to drive 800 miles to Yakima for a couple of concerts in Washington state and that's where the first U.S. tour ended as they flew home the next week.

===
Footnote:

What if Lemmy had died in 1980 and Bon Scott had lived?? Would humans have prevented the Cylon invasion?? Would the world not have crappy Nu Metal bands!? We can only ponder and wonder.

Yep, I've been watching the new AC/DC - Family Jewels DVD... Enough about Lemmy ANGUS!

"The only band that matters..." - Tour Manager Doug (who has seen AC/DC 61 times)

Find The Pope In The Pizza *

(* = Kudos to the readers who know this reference...)

"Would you like to see The Pope on the end of a rope? Do you think he's a fool?"

Black Sabbath always said it best.

One of Umlaut's early publishing influences was the legendary S.F. Metal fanzine Metal Mania.. From 1981-87, MM was published by the equally legendary S.F. Rock personae Ron Quintana and it was THE sounding board for the S.F. Metal Scene. Umlaut cut his teeth with Metal Mania taking photos and writing reviews / articles. Good times.

The Old School out there will remember back in 1982 when Karol Jozef Wojtyla (aka The Pope) was supposed to tour the U.S.. Metal Mania was there to cover that most METAL of events.

Metal Mania - Issue #2 - Late 1981

However, I think The Pope cancelled the tour because he was shot in an assasination attempt. Am I right on this? Help me out here.

The Pope did finally make it to S.F. in 1987 when he drew SRO crowds of around 86,000 to Candlestick Park.. and that year the Giants made it to the NLCS! Dog be praised.

"Sanfranciscorocksthankyouandgoodnightyoucrazymuthafuckers!!"

Take me down to Vatican City where the grass is green and the boys are pretty.

"On and on, south of Heaven....." - Slayer

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ADDENDUM:

Uhh... Okay...... Satan laughing holds his nose.. Oh Lord, yeah.

Vatican: John Paul II Was Not Embalmed
By MARTA FALCONI, Associated Press Writer
Tuesday, April 5, 2005

(04-05) 10:26 PDT VATICAN CITY, (AP) --

Departing from tradition, Pope John Paul II was not embalmed, only "prepared" for viewing by hundreds of thousands of mourners, the Vatican said Tuesday.

Vatican spokesman Joaquin Navarro-Valls did not elaborate on the procedure, but an embalmer in Rome said it appeared John Paul's remains were only touched up with cosmetics.

Massimo Signoracci, whose family embalmed three other popes, said he could not be certain what had been done without examining the body.

Signoracci said even a light embalming is necessary for a body that is exposed for several days.

John Paul died on Saturday, and his remains were put on public view late Monday on an open platform in St. Peter's Basilica. He will be buried Friday.

Historically, organs were removed to make embalming more durable. Relics of 22 popes — from Sixtus V, who died in 1590, to Leo XIII, who died in 1903 — are kept in Rome's St. Anastasio and Vincent Church, near the Trevi fountain.

Pope Pius X, who reigned from 1903 to 1914, abolished the custom of removing organs.

Embalming usually consists of draining the blood and other bodily fluids and intravenously injecting formaldehyde and other preserving liquids.

Signoracci said his family had embalmed the remains of John XXIII in 1963, and of Paul VI and John Paul I, who both died in 1978.

Paul VI was only lightly embalmed before his body was placed before the public during Rome's hot summer. But after two days the skin and fingernails began losing their color.

John XXIII's body, by contrast, was in excellent condition when it was exhumed from the cramped grotto under the basilica in 2001 — 38 years after his death — and moved to the main floor following his beatification.

John Paul II, who expressed a will to be buried underground, will be placed in John XXIII's vacant tomb.