The Year Of The Rabbit

Vintage Old Metal Decal

To quote Metallica: "Welcome to where time stands still..."

Long story short: 2011 was a surreal and amazingly great year for Umlaut. A profoundly huge amount of events and things came full circle in my life this year... most of which can basically be traced to the release of Murder In The Front Row. The book was meant to be a yearbook and tribute to the original Metal days in The Bay Area... and I think it accomplishes that... but enough shameless self-promotion. Ironically (or maybe not) Umlaut's sign in the Chinese Horoscope is The Rabbit and 2011 was The Year Of The Rabbit. Maybe there is something to the superstitious mumbo jumbo of my Yellow ancestors after all.

I've said this many times in the past, but I rant in this space mainly to keep my mind sharp; I like putting words together. The fact that I mainly rant about bands and music is kind of secondary. I rant here for fun and I just do my own thing. Umlaut will continue to fight the hordes, sing and cry, and we will see what the next 8,760 hours bring.

I will now quote that British band: "Let The Music be your Master, will you heed The Master's call?"... and with those words, here's my 2011 scorecard:

1. 01/08/11 - Melvins - Great American Music Hall
2. 01/15/11 - Neurosis / Yob / US Christmas - Great American Music Hall
3. 01/16/11 - Neurosis / Saviours / US Christmas - Great American Music Hall
4. 02/02/11 - Motörhead / Clutch - The Warfield
5. 02/04/11 - Social Distortion - The Warfield
6. 02/21/11 - Prince - Oakland Coliseum
7. 02/24/11 - Prince - Oakland Coliseum
8. 03/01/11 - Motörhead / Clutch - House Of Blues [Boston]
9. 03/20/11 - Acid King / Carlton Melton - Bottom Of The Hill
10. 04/03/11 - Helmet / Saint Vitus / Crowbar / Kylesa / Red Fang - Mezzanine
11. 04/08/11 - Volbeat / The Damned Things - The Fillmore
12. 04/09/11 - Jeff Beck & the Imelda May Band - The Fillmore
13. 04/14/11 - PJ Harvey - The Warfield
14. 04/23/11 - Metallica / Slayer / Megadeth / Anthrax - Empire Polo Club [Indio]
15. 04/28/11 - Accept - The Regency
16. 05/18/11 - Rammstein / Combichrist - Oakland Coliseum
17. 05/28/11 - Tony Bennett - Davies Symphony Hall
18. 06/03/11 - Orchid - Club Cocomo [San Francisco]
19. 06/07/11 - Orange Goblin / The Gates Of Slumber - Bottom Of The Hill
20. 07/10/11 - Megadeth / Machine Head / Testament / Suicide Silence - Shoreline Amphitheatre
21. 07/22/11 - Soundgarden / The Mars Volta - Bill Graham Civic
22. 07/25/11 - Fucked Up / Trash Talk - The Independent
23. 07/29/11 - Black Dahlia Murder / White Chapel - The Fillmore
24. 08/07/11 - Slayer / Rob Zombie / Exodus - WaMu Theater [Seattle]
25. 08/12/11 - Eyehategod / Impaler / Brainoil / Laudanum / The Burial Tide - The Metro [Oakland]
26. 08/17/11 - Diamond Head / Evildead / Slough Feg - Elbo Room
27. 08/27/11 - High On Fire / Black Cobra / Embers - Uptown
28. 08/31/11 - Metallica - Moscone Center
29. 09/16/11 - Rorschach / Brainoil / Needles - 924 Gilman
30. 09/29/11 - Saviours / Bison B.C. - The Independent
31. 10/03/11 - Warbringer / Lazarus A.D. / Landmine Marathon - The Key Club [Hollywood]
32. 10/09/11 - Orchid - Thee Parkside
33. 10/19/11 - Foo Fighters / Cage The Elephant - Oakland Coliseum
34. 10/23/11 - Anthrax / Testament / Death Angel - The Warfield
35. 10/27/11 - Judas Priest - Concord Pavilion
36. 11/03/11 - Mastodon / Dillinger Escape Plan / Red Fang - The Warfield
37. 11/07/11 - Warbringer / Landmine Marathon - Thee Parkside
38. 11/19/11 - Kyuss / Black Cobra / Papa Wheelie - The Regency
39. 12/05/11 - Metallica / Apocalyptica - The Fillmore
40. 12/06/11 - Iggy & the Stooges - The Warfield
41. 12/07/11 - Metallica / Armored Saint - The Fillmore
42. 12/09/11 - Metallica - The Fillmore
43. 12/10/11 - Metallica / Death Angel - The Fillmore
44. 12/16/11 - D.R.I. - Slim's

The last part of this year has been a blur and, for the first time in the 7+ year history of this blog, I blew off ranting about some amazing shows. To be honest, I hit a wall with writing and ranting... but I'll do my best to salvage something right here, right now.

2011 Shows: I'd say my favorites were (in no specific order)...

The year started off with two of my all-time favorite bands, the Melvins and Neurosis, obliterating San Francisco with sets that transcended being merely "concerts". In a year where I was submerged in my past a good amount of the time, looking back at these shows reminds me where I went after the Old Metal Days and where I ended up. In a perfect world these shows would have come at the end of the year instead of at the very beginning.

I caught Motörhead at two stops on their never-ending tour in Boston and San Francisco; my 14th and 15th Motörhead shows for those keeping score. It's still a charge for me to see Lemmy, Phil, and Mikkey onstage.. but this was my highlight from these shows in Boston:

'Sweet Emotion' meets 'Ace Of Spades'
(Pic by ümlaut)

Rammstein was the greatest spectacle I saw all year and it was made even more amazing because I was in Frankfurt, Germany the day before the show... and Prince was hands down the most talented musician I saw this year. The man has more musical talent in his little finger than all Death Metal musicians combined. There... I said it.

I witnessed sets by my friends Acid King, Black Cobra, and Landmine Marathon that were among the best that I've seen them play. In a year where I revisited the old days with bands from my past, it was so awesome to stay connected with newer bands who I'm friends with NOW. The past isn't that bad, but I've found myself feeling weird about mentally spending so much time there. Meanwhile back in the 21st Century...

I saw Metallica 6x this year; the last time I saw them that many times in 365 days was back in 1983. This included the band's 4-night, 30th Anniversary celebration at The Fillmore here in San Francisco on December 5th, 7th, 9th, and 10th. These shows were completely overwhelming to me. The band treated this event in the same way they had 2 years ago for their Rock 'N Roll Hall of Fame induction... They sought out and invited as many original fans as possible... which made the shows feel like the high school reunions I've never attended.

Unfortunately WAY too much happened at these shows for me to attempt to relate here, but you can get all of the details about the amazing guest appearances on the Internets. What made the shows overwhelming to me was not just what happened onstage. The most epic aspect of the week was that SO MANY old friends from near and far were at The Fillmore; I saw friends in double digits every night... I reconnected with old friends... was able to hang out with local friends... and I even met friends from back in The Day who I'd never met face-to-face before. AMAZING. These shows went a long way to wash the bile from my mind that was created by the bizarre corporate gig that I saw Metallica play back on August 31st.

I will say that the absolute musical highlight was MERCYFUL FATE reuniting onstage for the first time in 18 YEARS!! HOLY. FUCK. I knew that it was happening in advance... but when King Diamond, Hank Shermann, Michael Denner, and Timi Hansen walked onstage I lost it. At that exact moment a kid wearing a denim vest covered with band patches pushed past me and I instinctively followed him all the way to the front. As Metalli-Fate launched into the 'Mercyful Fate' medley everyone down front was singing along, including me, and it felt like 1984 all over again! "Howl like a wolf... and a witch will open the door!" Dude, I almost started crying. Seriously. Fate were a VERY special band for alot of us back in the original Murder In The Front Row Metal days... and to see them again left me speechless... literally... because I ended up losing my voice over the next couple of days due to the late nights combined with a long term cold / cough that I was battling. The Fate reunion was made even more profound because The Fillmore is practically across the street from where the Kabuki Theater used to be. In 1984 Fate played their first San Francisco show there and before the encore that night King summoned Metallica to the stage; Lars, James, and Cliff climbed out of the crowd to air guitar. Full circle, man. Full circle.

FATE!

(Pic by ümlaut)

Anyway, my brain is starting to get overwhelmed again so I'm not going to rant here much longer... but I do need to add that SLAYER were the most METAL band I saw this year; the more things change the more they stay the same. Their performances at The Big 4 show in Indio and later in Seattle with Gary Holt standing in for Hannemann were pure magic. The fact that Gary has been playing with Slayer after all these years is so Murder In The Front Row full circle it's mindblowing... There is so much history there; when Kerry King joined Exodus onstage in Seattle for 'Strike Of The Beast' it basically symbolized everything that's been going on for me this year. SLAAAYEER!! Also, it was appropriate that the final show I saw this year was a sold out D.R.I. show on December 16th with my co-author Harald O. tearing it up on his home stage the week that our book came out. Special.

Harald onstage in San Francisco
(Pic by ümlaut)

However, The Rock Godz work in mysterious ways and my year did end in the same Umlaut Real World vein that it began. Iggy & the Stooges played a show in the middle of the Metallica - Fillmore run on December 6th and it could not have been more perfect for me. From my arrival at The Warfield's entrance to my Lower Loge seat I ran into a roommate from 20 years ago... 6 or 7 friends... a reporter who interviewed me about Murder In The Front Row... a stranger who recognized me because she reads my blog... and my boss who I thought was still on a plane flying back from London... and then Iggy & the Stooges destroyed San Francisco.

The latest incarnation of the Stooges detonated onstage with ‘Raw Power’ that went straight into ‘Search And Destroy’ and the energy was unrelenting for the next 80 minutes. Iggy is 64 years old (young) but he was in the crowd at least 7x during the set. By comparison, Marianne Faithfull is also 64 years old but she didn't even attempt to dive into the crowd during her guest appearance with Metallica at The Fillmore. Just saying..

Witnessing Iggy’s surreal and timeless energy in person has always made me think that anything is possible. As unbelievably special as the Metallica shows were, the energy level was nowhere close to being as raw and primal as what the Stooges created both onstage and in the crowd. As the Stooges raced through 'Search And Destroy' it was as if they were channeling all of the angst and anger ever experienced by every person in the room. As Metallica started 'Seek And Destroy' as the final song each night at The Fillmore it signaled a balloon drop. It was disappointing that the most violent crowd action at all the Metallica - Fillmore shows happened during the balloon drop as greedy fans fought each other for the commemorative coins that were in the balloons. 'Seek And Destroy' made me want to fuck shit up back in the Murder In The Front Row days; now it's the balloon and beach ball drop song at Metallica concerts. Sad... but true.

THE STOOGES!
(Pic by ümlaut)

Just as the Melvins and Neurosis had reminded me of my post-Old Metal self at the beginning of the year, seeing Iggy again did the same thing for me at the end of this crazy year. "I'm the world's forgotten boy... The one who searches and destroys.." On the way back to the car, some pimply-faced teenagers called us fags. Upon returning to Casa de Umlaut after the Stooges show I made toast.

2011 Reality Check Moment:

• Goodnight Dixie
  

Anyway, this has been my quick 'n dirty review of 2011... THANKS for all the support, readers and friends. 2012 will mark the 8th Anniversary of this space... so let's see what happens next. I'll see you on the other side.

Victim Of Changes

Judas Priest
Sleep Train Pavilion, Concord, CA
October 27, 2011


When it was announced earlier this year that K.K. Downing had left Judas Priest on the eve of their "Farewell" Tour I decided there was no way I wanted to see them again. K.K. and Glenn Tipton have been the most enduring axe duo in Metal; for me and most of you reading this we've never known a time when that guitar team was not blazing the planet. Now that team is no more. I decided there was no fucking way I was going to this show.

Then days before the show I was put on a guest list via work... What's a good Priest song to symbolize me being a hypocrite?

Unbelievably horrible traffic out to Concord as usual but zero drama at Will Call = A trade off. Calling a band Thin Lizzy without Phil Lynott is a complete abomination and I want no part of it; but we arrived late and completely missed their set anyway. I can't stand Black Label Society; evidently Zakk Wylde wore an Indian head dress onstage this time. I thought he was from New Jersey?? I'm so glad he's not "part" Chinese so he doesn't wear a coolie hat onstage. Thankfully my mates and I spent most of their set eating some dubious venue food and having a beer. Then I had some work related responsibilities to take care of so I ducked backstage, but it was all good. Just another day at the office...
I reemerged into the Real World from the magical world of Backstage mere minutes before Priest were due to take the stage. After being directed around a couple of times by ushers we found ourselves in 4th row seats, dead center. To be honest, the seats made up for K.K. not being in the building; this was my 7th time seeing Priest and I've never been that close to the stage. Sorry K.K... but I can be fickle and shallow like that. "I'm made of Metal.. My circuits gleam.."

The focus on this "Farewell" Tour is that Priest are playing at least one song off of every studio album. A VERY cool idea... if only they'd done this when K.K. was in the band! Anyway we were only in our seats for a couple of minutes, beers in hand, before the houselights went down... the intro tape started... the curtain covering the stage fell... and Priest were right in front of us as 'Rapid Fire' announced the start of the set. It was fucking awesome... until I glanced to the left side of the stage and saw Fake K.K... Buzz kill.. However, I quickly got into the mindset that I was going to have a good time instead of obsessing on K.K.'s absence... and thankfully Priest made it easy by going from 'Rapid Fire' into 'Metal Gods' into 'Heading Out To The Highway'. I sipped on my beer and sang along like the aging Metalhead that I am... and it was good.

Photo by Umlaut iPhone

The high point of the 21-song set for Umlaut was the one-two nostalgic punch of 'Starbreaker' (HOLY SHIT.. They played 'Starbreaker'!) that went into 'Victim Of Changes'. The latter is probably my favorite Priest song and watching the middle solo without K.K. playing it felt wrong even with lasers lighting up the stage... but I still sang along to it. For whatever reason, Slayer and Judas Priest are the only bands that cause me to sing along when I see them live. I have no idea why. Discuss amongst yourselves. However, watching dozens of dudes singing along with Halford to 'Turbo Lover' made me think of a 70's San Francisco bath house... not that there's anything wrong with that.

Because I like to nitpick, I was bummed that the Rocka Rolla track performed was 'Never Satisfied' which Halford had performed on his solo tour last year. However, I tried to stay focused on having fun instead of being a jaded old fart... and the return of 'Beyond The Realms Of Death' to the setlist had me singing along again.. "He'd found a place in his mind and slammed the door..." still gets me every time after all these years, man.

Although I hate to admit it, this was the most F-U-N show of the year! Probably due to the beers, but I made the mental leap and simply got caught up in the songs and tried to ignore Fake K.K. onstage as much as possible. Granted, Fake K.K. did a good job... but it just wasn't the same... but I had F-U-N despite myself. I genuinely felt like I was that 16-year old Judas Priest fan again. "Breaking the what?!"

Photo by Sensory Abuse iPhone

Although I should have, I didn't do a merch audit, but Priest did have the best merch IMO. On the way back to the car, some pimply-faced teenagers called us fags. Going into the show I ignored any spoiler posts online about the setlist... but I ran into Gary Holt in the concourse before the show and he blew it for me when he rattled off some of the songs Priest were going to play (Exodus had just supported Priest in Poland in August..). Thanks, Gary.

Click HERE to see Photo Ray's shots from the night!

The Big 4, 6, & 7

Anthrax / Testament / Death Angel
The Warfield, San Francisco
October 23, 2011

It's taken me several days to get my head around this night. This show represented A LOT of things in Umlaut's past and present that have come full circle this year... and it was kind of overwhelming a couple of times. This was the biggest Metal show to hit The Bay Area in 2011 and was the perfect bookend to Umlaut's epic experience at The Big 4 show in Indio back in April. However, tonight's bill carried more emotional weight because 2 of the 3 main bands were playing in front of their hometown! EPIC.

Prior to the show Photo Ray, Sensory Abuse, and I performed the all too common pre-show ritual of pints and food at The Irish Bank. Then we few, we happy few, made our way to The Warfield for a night of vintage Metal. Within literally a minute of arriving at The Warfield two people commented on The Record Vault shirt I was wearing, including Ted of Death Angel who said he was wearing his Vault shirt onstage tonight! The Bay Area Metal pride was thick in the air and I hadn't even gone inside yet... Once inside I was overwhelmed by the number of old friends who were at the show; it felt like the high school reunion that I never attended in so many ways. However, before I could really socialize I had to take care of some work related responsibilities, but it was all good. Just another day at the office...

(Photo courtesy of Cable Car)

Death Angel were the only band that had the crowd chanting their name before they hit the stage. The hometown heroes detonated immediately with one of their newer songs 'I Chose The Sky' before blazing into 'Evil Priest' from their classic 1987 debut album. The band has been on the road for 18 months and it showed; they were simply awesome. No band works a stage better than Death Angel and their San Francisco hometown pride was in full effect with Ted wearing his Record Vault tee and Will on drums wearing a Niners jersey. I literally got chills down my spine as the hometown crowd (including the balcony) went off during the band's set. It was very special and the first time Death Angel had played The Warfield since 1990 (!). 'Seemingly Endless Time' is always the highlight of a Death Angel set for me... Oddly the band did not play their original war cry 'Kill As One' which was kind of a bummer; it would have been cool to hear the big crowd singing that chorus with the band. It was a criminally short 35 minute set but Death Angel was my favorite band of the night. It's so fucking great to see the band rising above the lineup upheavals of recent years to recapture that fire which made them special to begin with.. and it warmed my heart to hear the crowd chanting "Death Angel... Death Angel.." again after they left the stage.

Death Angel
(Photo courtesy of Sensory Abuse)

Click HERE to see Photo Ray's Death Angel shots!

For the only time on this tour, Testament had their full stage show for tonight's hometown appearance. Whenever Testament walks onstage I get kind of overwhelmed because the band is so larger than life to me now. There's Chuck Billy's gigantic charisma of course, but the rest of the band also exude a swagger that makes me proud to call The Bay Area home along with them. Their hour long, 13 song set exploded with a 1988 double shot of 'The Preacher' into 'The New Order'.. WOW. Testament were even more crushing tonight than usual, with the mix and volume being more thunderous even by their standards. 'Into The Pit' is always the set highlight of a Testament set for me... especially when Chuck Billy holds his half mic stand like a Metal Wizard churning a cauldron of metal to get the crowd action going. The set was so solid, heavy, and loud it kind of left my head spinning... At that point I should have gotten a beer but I don't think I did.

Testament
(Photo courtesy of Sensory Abuse)

Click HERE to see Photo Ray's Testament shots!

Not long after Testament's set one thing led to another and I found myself having an enlightened chat with Alex Skolnick in his dressing room. It made me wish for a day when all Rock Stars were cool and intelligent human beings... Just saying. I then managed to duck upstairs to the stage just as the stage changeover was completed for Anthrax. As the houselights went down I found myself at stage left with Joey Belladonna doing his vocal warm ups right in front of me. I'm not a singer so I found it interesting...

It had been 5 years since Anthrax last played inside the San Francisco city limits. To be honest, the set Anthrax played was very strong but it didn't blow me away. The new songs work well live, but playing a cover of Sepultura's 'Refuse / Resist' seemed misguided when they have so many of their own songs after 30 years. However, the old classics like 'Madhouse', 'Antisocial', and 'Metal Thrashing Mad' were top notch and Belladonna proved he's still a great front man.

While Anthrax raged onstage, the area around me at stage left filled up with a Who's Who of Metal featuring Kerry of Slayer, Gary of Exodus, Robb of Machine Head, Mark of Death Angel, and Kirk of that band Metallica. Impressive, right?! I was also impressed when Scott Ian gave a shout out to San Francisco and mentioned his band's first show here in 1984 at The Kabuki with Raven and Exodus. Who else reading this was at that show besides Umlaut?

Mr. Kerry Fucking King
(Photo courtesy of Cable Car)

The end of Anthrax's set turned into one of the quintessential Old Metal moments of the year. As they launched into the set closing 'I Am The Law', Kirk Metallica snuck behind the PA stack at stage left watching the song. It was cute watching the kids in the front row notice their hometown hero and lose their shit. Then when the chorus of the song came, Kirk and Mark Death Angel casually walked onstage to share vocals with a surprised Scott Ian. When you think about how much shared history Metallica and Anthrax have together it was cool seeing it all come back around onstage in Metallica's hometown. As the song ended Anthrax suddenly started an impromptu version of 'Whiplash' during which Ian took off his guitar and handed it to Kirk... and the impromptu version of the song took flight for several more minutes. So. Fucking. Cool.

(Photo courtesy of Cable Car)

Although I should have, I didn't do a merch audit, but Anthrax did have the best merch IMO. On the way back to the car, some pimply-faced teenagers called us fags. It was an epic night and I didn't roll back into Casa de Umlaut until 1:00am.. and it was a school night... but the Metal Godz had blessed us with a spectacular night... and it was cool to be able to catch up with two of my favorite non-Caucasian band friends:

Ted Death Angel

Not Dave Mustaine

(Photos courtesy of Cable Car)

"DROKK IT!"

Slaycation

Slayer / Rob Zombie / Exodus
WaMu Theater, Seattle, Washington
August 6, 2011


Because of my decision to travel to Seattle for this weekend of Metal, I missed not one but two Yob / Dark Castle shows and also the return to San Francisco of my kindred Metal friends Landmine Marathon, but my plans had been made in advance of those shows being announced. Metal guilt was eating me up inside as I arrived at SFO for the flight North and although part of me was really bummed about what I was missing at home, the Metal F-U-N in Seattle proved to be worth the sacrifice. Ironically a mob of Bay Area people also made the trip North of Heaven for the Portland and Seattle shows since they were the only West Coast dates on this 12-city tour (a shout out to Paschke, Cable Car, and Lisa P..).

Upon landing I picked up the rental car and the first song that came on the radio was Soundgarden as I drove out of the airport; I'm not kidding. For the rest of my stay, Seattle Rock radio KISW displayed a blatant narcissistic trait of playing Seattle bands way too often (Soundgarden, Heart, Pearl Jam, Alice In Chains.. etc.). Okay, I get it, those bands are from here. Prior to the show we did a Yelp search of the area looking for food and the very first place that came up was called… Araya’s Place! I shit you not. The Metal Godz work in mysterious ways… but we didn’t eat there.

After parking the rental car a block from the venue, the echos of people shouting "SLAAAYEER!" could already be heard in the streets and alleys. I can't think of another band that causes such primal behavior so randomly... and it makes me laugh out loud every time. On another note, it's always nice when a show is this easy:

The inside of this venue had the weird hybrid vibe of a nightclub, a sports bar, and a warehouse; a soulless multipurpose space if there ever was one. However, I didn't have to suffer the details of the space for very long since the houselights went down and Exodus arrived onstage to give Seattle a proper Bay Area-style ass kicking. We quickly made our way past the security barrier and watched the mayhem from stage right. With only 30 minutes and 6 songs to work with the Bay Area heroes wasted no time in getting things going with 3 newer songs... 'The Ballad Of Leonard & Charles' into 'War Is My Shepard' into 'Blacklist'. For the kill shot, Exodus finished off with 3 old songs... 'Bonded By Blood' into 'Toxic Waltz' and then an amazing set-closing 'Strike Of The Beast' that featured a guest appearance by Kerry Fucking King!!

Photo courtesy of Cable Car

While 'Strike' was the obvious highlight of the set, my Inner Teenage Metalhead couldn't stop smiling as I watched a kid against the barrier singing along to 'Bonded By Blood'. That kid is gonna be alright! There's only one other band who I have as more history with than Exodus... and it was pretty fucking cool that Slayer put them on this tour as pay back for "borrowing" Gary during Hanneman's recovery over the past 10 months. That kind of Old School loyalty doesn't happen very often these days.

During the changeover before Rob Zombie we walked back out amongst the civilians to check out the merch table in the lobby. At one point during our trek through the drunk Saturday night masses I heard someone behind me cough followed by the unmistakable sound of vomit hitting a concrete floor. I didn't turn around and just kept walking.

As we found a spot at the soundboard to watch Zombie's set I was prepared to be as underwhelmed by him as I've been in the past. While I love his aesthetic and I like John 5 on guitar, Zombie's dance music disguised as Metal (with its electro beat under everything) has never really done it for me. Tonight was the last show of Zombie's Hellbilly Deluxe 2 Tour and I have to admit tonight's final show was... really great! The show I saw early in the tour in San Jose quickly became a distant bad memory as Zombie ripped through a tight 70-minute set filled with his usual theatrics of horror video, pyro, and no less than 7 mechanical beasts that wheeled or marched onto the stage at various times. Maybe it was because it was the last night of the long tour, but the band seemed to be in overdrive as they worked the stage effectively and Zombie seemed to be way more engaged than the last time I saw him.

An odd end of the tour moment came when Zombie introduced Rob of Exodus onstage to help him with a pretty lame crowd participation segment followed by Rob contributing back up vocals to 'Sick Bubblegum'. It was odd. Anyway, the final song of the set and the tour was a spirited version of 'Dragula' that featured fire and confetti cannons... and then Rob Zombie slipped into the night to return to making horror movies featuring his wife.

Photo courtesy of Cable Car

During the 40 minute changeover break between Zombie and Slayer we wandered backstage to find the usual distractions that civilians expect backstage (use your imaginations...). We also got a glimpse behind the scenes of Zombie's cabaret act as his stage props were brought offstage:

Photo courtesy of Cable Car

Having a bill of Slayer and Rob Zombie gave the audience two different versions of Hell: Zombie's is a comic book version of Hell filled with hot chicks, hot rods, and monsters. Slayer's version of Hell is a bleak blood-soaked reality. Whereas Zombie relied heavily on theatrics to communicate his version of Satan's playground, Slayer only needed a wall of Marshall cabinets, a pair of huge metal Slayer Eagles above the stage, and their unrelenting and brutal music. During the opening song 'World Painted Blood' there was something going on in the crowd down front but because of the lighting I couldn't figure out what it was... Then it hit me: It was a guy in a fucking WHEELCHAIR crowd surfing:

Photo by Umlaut's iPhone

Fucking insane!! According to the Umlaut Archives, tonight was around my 23rd time seeing Slayer and I've NEVER seen anything like that! I know it sucked for those underneath him, but kudos to that guy and to his buddies for lifting him up. You do not see someone enjoying life that hardcore and to the fullest very often! That guy was the definition of handi-capable! HAIL!

In recent years it's become cathartic and even a spiritual thing for me to witness Slayer onstage. Seriously. Their brutality through volume serves as a mantra straight to those dark places where normal people won't go... Their dark and violent Metal vision gives me perspective to balance out the lighter Classic Rock side of life. At different times during the set I knew I wasn't the only one who felt that way as I saw fans raise their hands to the sky, palms open, as if they were testifying to an unseen "something". God had nothing to do with it. Nothing.

The most profound difference in Slayer's approach to Metal compared to Zombie's came during 'South Of Heaven'. While Zombie put on a pop culture and effects fueled extravaganza to get the crowd going, Slayer's approach was so minimalist it was brilliant. As 'South Of Heaven' slowly built up from its intro to its full speed fury, the plain black backdrop fell to reveal a massive SLAYER logo. The effect of this happening half way through the song, and well into the set, was awesome and the crowd went apeshit. Brilliant... AND cost effective.

SLAAAYEER!!!
[Photo courtesy of Cable Car]

This was the final indoor show of Slayer's World Painted Blood Tour which started in 2009 and was plagued by events that would have derailed a lesser band. First there was Araya needing neck surgery and then Hanneman being stricken by the very Metal disease Necrotizing fasciitis (the most Metal disease ever..), the latter requiring the band to enlist the help of Gary Holt to complete the tour. This was the 2nd time I'd seen the band with Gary and, while it will be the best day when Hanneman is back onstage, I have to say it's been a revelation watching Slayer be energized by Gary's presence. Given the uncertain future of the original lineup the band has looked hungry and filled with bloodlust in their recent performances, especially Kerry.

Gary 'n Kerry
[Photo courtesy of Cable Car]

The night's final assault of 'Raining Blood' into 'Black Magic'(!) into 'Angel Of Death' was completely obliterating as Slayer finished this final indoor show of the tour. I also liked how Lombardo's playing during the final minute of 'Angel Of Death' alone blew away the drumming during Zombie's entire 70 minute set... and I couldn't help but smile when I noticed the kid in the middle of the pit holding up the national flag of Chile for Tom towards the end of the set. For the White Power Slayer fans: Tom is Chilean (aka a brown person) and his last name is Araya and not "Aryan"... Oh and Lombardo is Cuban (aka also a brown person).

White Power tees = 1. If you bought one of every Slayer merch item you would have paid over $400. On the way back to the hotel, some pimply-faced teenagers called me a fag.

The next day I had all day to kill before my flight home so I checked out the Nirvana exhibition at the Experience Music Project. It was interesting... but to be honest it's completely weird when I see something that I was into when it was happening be presented in such a portentous way years later.

The exhibit featured such Nirvana artifacts as old cassette demos, show flyers, articles of Cobain's clothes, Cobain's guitars, and candid photos from Nirvana's pre-fame DIY tours. Unlike most "Metal fans", Umlaut is of the opinion that it was not Grunge that killed 80's Metal. It was the bullshit Hair Metal bands that destroyed it! Once those bullshit bands became legitimized then anything associated with "Metal" became tainted by their cancer of mediocrity. Seriously. I think it's funny that you've never heard Slayer complain about Grunge but you STILL hear a bullshit "Metal" band like Ratt complaining how Grunge ruined their career. That being said, while the Nirvana exhibition was interesting in a surreal way I completely geeked out when I stumbled upon the Battlestar Galactica exhibition that was upstairs!! HOLY FRAK!

The exhibit had such show artifacts as full-size Vipers and Cylon fighters (!), Number Six's iconic red dress (!), as well as other costumes, models, and props. Sorry Grunge... BSG at its best was better than your flannel. I also had time to visit the sculpture that inspired the Soundgarden song 'Black Hole Sun':

I like the song more now knowing it was inspired by a piece of public art; Grunge lives in our (he)arts. Anyway, a few hours after all of this my Slaycation was over as I sat on a jet airliner heading back to Casa de Umlaut.

Slaycation all I ever wanna do... Slaycation had to get away.

A Case Of The Mondays

Fucked Up / Trash Talk
The Independent, San Francisco
July 25, 2011


I had forgotten about this show until a couple of days before... and then I discovered that the infamous Trash Talk were also on the bill. DOH!! It was going to be a F-U-N Monday night in The Haight! Prior to the show Photo Ray, Sensory Abuse, and I met up for some pre-show food 'n beers involving Rosamunde and Toronado.

Then we few, we happy few, walked over to The Independent for what turned out to be one of the best shows of the year.

I've seen Trash Talk described as a band with "two black guys and two white guys". They hail from Sacramento and are infamous for shows that escalate into full-scale brawls. This was one of those rare shows where the sense of danger, or at least that feeling that anything could happen, was thick in the air. Evidently Trash Talk are banned from playing Gilman Street; how Punk is that?!! They are also reportedly banned from playing several cities in the U.K. as well. Trash Talk are also one of those bands who seem to confuse mainstream / clueless music publications as I've seen them called "Metal" by some and "Punk" by others... but they obviously have some juice behind them since besides playing sweaty clubs they've also played major festivals overseas this year like Download in the U.K. and Soundwave in Australia.

It's been a long time since I've seen a crowd terrified by a band... but that's what happened tonight when Trash Talk launched into their set and the singer Lee leaped off the stage during the first song for hand-to-hand combat with the audience. As the floor opened up into a pit for the entirety of the set, the tornado of anger and volume created by Trash Talk was infectious and, while kids around me moved away from the stage, I felt compelled to move closer. Trash Talk in full roar are impossible to keep your eyes off of as Lee roamed the entire length of the club (even ending up on top of the bar at the back of the room at one point) while onstage Garrett (guitar) and Spencer (bass) stalked back and forth feeding off the energy happening in front of them and Sam on drums kept the mayhem focused. Watching Trash Talk was like watching a street gang take apart a rival one limb at a time; at one point Lee returned to the stage, only to take a running leap to land amidst a pile of audience members.

(Photo courtesy of Sensory Abuse)

For much of this year I've been a Jaded Old Fart, but watching Trash Talk take over The Independent reminded me why I got into this Music Geek business in the first place. Seeing a band display such uncut passionate rage is something most people never witness. Onstage the lads from Sacramento remind me alot of the Gallows who up to this point have been one of my absolute favorite live bands. However, with the recent departure of Gallows singer Frank, the time is ripe for Trash Talk to grab my fandom and chain it to the back of their van and hit the gas pedal. After their set I met back up with Photo Ray, Sensory Abuse, and SF Sludge and basically all we could say to each other was "Holy Fuck..."; it felt like we were standing in the aftermath of a horrific car accident and no one had been wearing a seatbelt. Hail Sacramento!

(Photo courtesy of Sensory Abuse)

I've seen Fucked Up described as a band with "the 300 pound singer". As much as I like Fucked Up, I've only managed to see them once before back in February 2009. Fucked Up have evolved into a band that is hard to describe... They started as a Hardcore band but have evolved into almost like a Punk Prog Art Rock thing, with songs that can be downright transcendental. With 3 guitars they create a wall of sound that isn't something brutal that knocks you over, but more like a curtain of volume that lifts your head above the bullshit of the world so you can look down on it and have your eardrums blown out at the same time.

(Photo courtesy of Sensory Abuse)

Fucked Up's songs are beautiful in a non-traditional way that's hard to describe; it's like looking at a gorgeous woman who only has one leg and no arms but who has profound things to say. Onstage their sense of melody combined with Damian's large personality and sense of humor makes them infectious. Whereas Trash Talk brought a darkness and uncertainty to the night, Fucked Up brought a more inspirational balance to the show; maybe it's because they're Canadian. However, as he's known for doing, Damian spent a good part of the set in the crowd as members of the packed audience held his mic cord above the fray.

How many bands dedicate a song to people who collect vinyl? Fucked Up does. If the band has a "hit" song it would probably be the anthem 'Crooked Head' that was the highlight of the set. I'd forgotten how inspiring and life affirming a really great Punk show can be. Tonight featured two bands who channel their anger and angst in different ways. Trash Talk brought the darkness and violence. Fucked Up brought something equally as powerful but from a different point of view. This was hands down one of the best shows of the year... Not bad for a Monday night in San Francisco.

(Photo courtesy of Sensory Abuse)

I didn't do a merch audit but Fucked Up had 3 tees for sale and unfortunately Trash Talk had none. On the way back to the car, some pimply-faced teenagers called us fags. Click HERE to see more of Sensory Abuse's shots from the night.. and click HERE to see Photo Ray's shots of Fucked Up and HERE for his Trash Talk shots.

The next morning (Tuesday) I had one of the shittiest starts to a day in awhile and while I sped to work I cranked Trash Talk... and just when I was starting to be in a better mood I found out that Ludicra, one of my all-time favorite bands and the undisputed headliners of the Bay Area Metal Scene, have called it a day. FUCK... I'm thankful to have seen Ludicra at least 12x over the years... THANKS for the volume inspiration Laurie, John, Christy, Aesop, and Ross. Click HERE for Umlaut's Ludicra memories... FUCK.

Über Alles

Rammstein / Combichrist
Oracle Arena, Oakland, California
May 18, 2011

In an ironic twist of Teutonic fate, I woke up in Frankfurt, Germany the day before this show... Long story short: Umlaut was on his way back from vacation in Europe. Anyway, as my jet lag and fried brain and body made its way to Oracle Arena, I hoped my Deutschland Week wouldn't end with me in a bunker and the Soviet Army closing in on me...

Row 13 in First Class, mofos!

Oakland was one of only 9 cities on Rammstein's brief North American Tour, their first trip to these shores in 10 years (!). The Germans were the #1 band I've been wanting to see since I've missed their past visits. I'm not the biggest Industrial fan... and I tend to find Trent Reznor more annoying than not... but I've come to be a big fan of these Germans mainly because they've managed to meld Industrial heaviness with a sense of humor.

Man, I was DRAGGING by the time I arrived at the venue; I had been home from Europe less than 24 hours, got only 4 hours of sleep, and had gone to the show straight from work. I was borderline exhausted and teetering on passing out... Anyway, after getting felt up for the second time in 24 hours by a large security guard (the Frankfurt airport security dude had a softer touch than the Oracle security dude) we found a table in the Club Level... and ordered what turned out to be one of the worst veggie burgers I've ever had. Who the fuck puts barbecue sauce on a veggie burger that hasn't been cooked outdoors on a fucking barbeque?! Oracle Arena does, that's who.

The night could only get better after the awful veggie burger, and Combichrist were good... but I was still hungry; I probably should have gotten some fries. Anyway, onstage Combichrist exudes a Nine Inch Nails Pretty Hate Machine vibe; I liked how the lads took their opening slot by the throat and treated the stage as their own.

To be honest, I started writing this rant around 2 weeks ago... and I lost steam. Jet lag cracked my skull for several days... and catching up with work... and then my 103 year old grandmother passed away... so basically there are only so many minutes and hours in the day... and this rant lost out as time passed and my motivation to finish it waned.

Anyway, like the Roger Waters - The Wall show, I was having trouble putting the Rammstein experience into words because it was so fucking visual. INSANELY VISUAL but with so much dark humor it made The Wall look like a stage show for old people... which I guess it was when you think about it. Everyone knows that Rammstein have a shitload of pyro and flames in the stage show, including FLAMETHROWER MASKS (look vids up on YouTube).


The bombastic and mindblowing set consisted of 18 songs with only 1 of them sung in English ('Pussy'). Despite the language barrier I was surprised how many of the 10,000 fans in attendance knew all of the songs... and I was not threatened at all by the trio of young blond boys to my right who sang along to every song in German. However, it was the subtle and sublime parts of the stage show that blew me away more than all the pyro... but I'm seriously not into trying to finish this piece since it was, like, 2 weeks ago now and alot has happened in my life since this gig. All I will say is that Rammstein were probably the greatest arena show I've ever seen; Rammstein are KISS for adults. Seriously... and sorry I'm not motivated now to back this claim up with fancy adjectives and such.

Leiderhosen = 1. On the way back to the car, some pimply-faced teenagers called us fags. While exiting the arena, the girl walking behind me was singing in German... and I didn't feel threatened by it. Anyway, this was 2 weeks ago and Ghost are playing San Francisco in October!

The Big 4

The Big 4
Metallica / Slayer / Megadeth / Anthrax
Empire Polo Grounds, Indio, California
April 23, 2011

Yes, Umlaut attended The Big 4. Yes, I had All Access. Unfortunately, I'm not sure when I'll have time to post a complete rant about it here... Long story short, I've committed to covering the event for a "real" publication and I shouldn't post the Umlaut version of events until after that piece is published. Plus, I'm leaving for a long overdue vacation very soon...

All I will say right now is that The Big 4 was an EPIC day and it made this jaded Old Metalhead believe again. Man, around 50,000 Metalheads gathered in the desert for this show; no bullshit 2nd rate bands filling the day and no bullshit 2nd stages. It was just 4 classic Metal bands; all killer and no filler! The Old Metal vibe in the crowd and everywhere else was so intense I almost couldn't stand it; I realized this is what European Metal Fests feel like. I thought all of the bands were great in their own ways, but Slayer's set was incredible on many levels.

First of all, seeing my old friend Gary Holt filling in for the ailing Jeff Hanneman was mindblowing... especially since Gary was a complete Rock Star on the big stage and nailed it. When Gary did the solo in 'The Antichrist' it was Ruthie's Inn coming full circle into the 21st Century. Dude, Slayer also played 'Black Magic'... and watching 'Seasons In The Abyss' performed in the desert was perfect. Also, watching Slayer from stage right as they charged into 'World Painted Blood' to the roar of 50,000 Metalheads will be one of my top moments of the year... and to those jaded Metalheads who dismiss the new Slayer songs I want to say that I could hear the crowd singing along to 'World Painted Blood' and 'Hate Worldwide' (the opening songs of the set) from the stage! 'Nuff said.

Araya and Holt prepare to destroy all..
(Photo by Umlaut)

However, one of THE best concert moments of my entire life happened at the end of Slayer's set: The stage lights were off and the intro to 'South Of Heaven' started... and then the stage lights came on and it was fucking JEFF HANNEMAN onstage for the first time in 6 months!! THE most METAL thing was Hanneman was wearing a long sleeve t-shirt with the right sleeve cut off to show his heavily scarred and damaged arm. WOW.

(Photo courtesy of Photo Ray)

It was one of the best Slayer sets I've ever seen. Jeff was obviously rusty onstage after so much time being sick and recovering, but then about half way through 'Angel Of Death' he stepped to the front of the stage and got into *that* trademark Hanneman stance (legs spread, head down, blond hair flying).. and he was BACK! It was so fucking awesome.. At the end of the song Hanneman turned his guitar headstock down towards the stage and held it in front of him like an inverted cross while strangling the final note out of the instrument. . Dude, you never see the Slayer guys do Rock Star / Guitar God poses with their instruments like that onstage... but it was that kind of set.

I never thought I'd get emotional at a Slayer concert... but I almost got teary-eyed. SLAAAYEER LIVES! ! The ORIGINAL lineup lives! The coolest thing was how Slayer handled everything: There was never an announcement about Gary being on guitar or introducing Jeff back onstage. Slayer always presents themselves as a single entity: SLAYER. No bullshit.

Slayer's Big 4 setlist:

• World Painted Blood
• Hate Worldwide
• War Ensemble
• Postmortem
• Raining Blood
• Black Magic
• Dead Skin Mask
• Americon
• Silent Scream
• The Antichrist
• Seasons in the Abyss
• Payback
• Snuff
• South of Heaven (with Hanneman)
• Angel of Death (with Hanneman)

To be honest, we had seen Hanneman backstage earlier in the day and had been tipped off he was going to be playing 2 songs... but when it went down it was WAY beyond what I thought it was going to be like. Slayer was just one of the moments during Big 4 that made this jaded Old Metalhead believe again.

All Access Laminate... Slayer VIP Pass... Maps.. VIP Parking Pass..

Devo shirts = 1. Anyway, that's all I'm gonna post about my All Access Big 4 right now (sorry). On the way back to San Francisco, some pimply-faced teenagers called us fags.. which makes sense I guess. I'll hopefully post a more complete rant about the EPIC day in the near future.

"Curse... Black Magic night.." Click HERE to see Photo Ray's SLAAAYEER shots from the day!

Anthrax appeases the Metal Masses..
(Photo by Umlaut)

Old School

Jeff Beck & the Imelda May Band
The Fillmore, San Francisco
April 9, 2011

Jeff Beck is one of Umlaut's favorite Guitar Gods... and the chance to see him at The Fillmore was a no-brainer. A historic musician in a historic venue; those who fail to learn from history are destined to listen to crap music.. Tonight was the final show of a brief 12 city tour featuring Jeff Beck backed by singer Imelda May and her band. The inspiration behind the shows was Beck paying tribute to the late Les Paul and also to pay homage to the Rock Music of the 1950's that inspired him when he was young.

While killing time in The Fillmore's upstairs bar before the show it was obvious the crowd tonight was a total Baby Boomer Sausage Fest; it was definitely a Bro Date Night for the Weekend Warrior crowd. The following exchange happened between the bartender and an older gentleman standing next to me at the bar:

Bartender: "What would you like?"
Older Gentleman: "A beer."
Bartender: "What kind of beer?"
Older Gentleman: "In a bottle."
Bartender: (pause) "... a Budweiser?"
Older Gentleman: "Yes."

Hope I die before I get old.

Before the set started Beck announced the tribute nature of tonight's show and then he and the band were off and running with versions of songs by Elvis Presley ('Baby Let's Play House') and Gene Vincent ('Cruising'). I was in total Music Geek alert watching Beck strap on his Telecaster because I knew something special was coming... and then he and the band launched into a rip-roaring version of 'Train Kept A-Rollin' that was done like the original rockabilly version instead of the more famous Yardbirds take on the song. Jeff Beck playing 'Train Kept A-Rollin' at The Fillmore!? Woah..

The saucy Imelda May joined the band onstage about 1/3 of the way into the show for a compelling set of Les Paul and Mary Ford classics, including 'Vaya Con Dios' (of course..)... but Beck & Imelda didn't perform 'Tennessee Waltz'. Hmmm.. wonder why.

Les Paul & Mary Ford

It was interesting to watch musicians from England and Ireland (May is Irish) recreating vintage American Rock Music and coming across completely genuine and not cheesy at all. From a Music Geek standpoint it was also interesting watching Beck switch between different guitars so often during the set; usually he just delivers the goods onstage with a Stratocaster. He went from a Gibson hollow body, to a Les Paul (!), to his signature cream Strat depending on the song. When Beck struck his trademark stance to hit a note, posing his cream colored Strat against his right hip and pointing the headstock towards the sky, you could hear the Music Geeks in the room squeal like little schoolgirls (guilty!).

(Photo stolen from The Internet)

According to the Umlaut Archives this was the 5th time I've seen Beck (dating back to 1983) and it was my favorite performance. I'm a fan of Beck's Jazz work, but this was a completely old style Rock 'N Roll set... and the Guitar God soloed during every song. Highlights for Umlaut were the blistering versions of 'Peter Gunn' and 'Apache'. The version of the latter kind of blew my mind... and there was also a very good version of 'Walking In The Sand' with Imelda May channeling The Shangri-Las nicely. A bonus for the great night was that the free Fillmore poster was one of the best ones I've seen in a long time:

The night had the exact same vibe as when I've seen Lemmy perform with his side band The Head Cat; an evening where a Rock Legend geeks out on the music that influenced him. It was like watching Jeff Beck pull records (vinyl!) out of his collection and play them for us.

Thanks to Cable Car for sorting my ticket tonight!

If you bought one of every Jeff Beck merch item you would have paid around $390 including Wired on vinyl (!). On the way back to the car, some pimply-faced teenagers called us fags. The next day ALL of the 21st Century communication wired into Casa de Umlaut (The Internets / Cable) went down for most of the day. How did people find out about music in the 1950's?!