The Longest Day Turns 70

Today marks the 70th Anniversary of The Longest Day.  Last Fall, Umlaut accomplished a life long goal of visiting Normandy, France and the D-Day battlefields.  Calling the experience epic doesn't begin to do it justice.  Anyway, I have not been in a writing mood recently (which is why this space has been silent) but since a picture is worth a thousand words here are several thousand "words" on my pilgrimage: 

Pegasus Bridge

Sainte-Mère-Église [Note the tribute to Pvt. John Steele]

Sainte-Mère-Église.  This site is now a public restroom.... Awkward.

I stumbled into Carentan, France almost by accident.  If you've watched Band Of Brothers you understand why this was a big deal... Unfortunately, the plaque on the village's monument to the 101st Airborne was badly oxidized and hard to read.

 Dragon's Teeth - Juno Beach
 

This view is looking down on the Omaha Beach killing zone from the bluff where the Germans were entrenched in 1944.  It's now where the American Cemetery is located.

What I listened to while walking on Omaha Beach.  Maiden.  Always.

This is a panoramic shot of Omaha Beach taken from the water's edge and looking towards the bluff where the Germans were entrenched in 1944 and where the American Cemetery is now located.  I walked from the water's edge all the way back up to the top of the bluff.  Images from the dozens of World War II books that I've read since I was a kid and the scenes from The Longest Day and Saving Private Ryan almost blinded my psyche.  It was one of the most intense experiences ever and was made even more profound because I was literally the only human on the beach... which tripped me out.  As my feet sank into the sand with each step I felt like I was walking on the souls of all the dead soldiers.

Two of Robert Capa's famous Omaha Beach photos taken in the heat of combat on D-Day.

 Master Of Puppets.. The American Cemetery - Omaha Beach

I have no idea....

 

Pointe du Hoc.  The ground is still scarred and misshapen from the June 1944 combat.  The ruins of old German fortifications are everywhere to climb into and feel the ghosts of war. 

How do you say Master Of Puppets in German?  The German Cemetery - La Cambe, France

An Unknown German Soldier

An Unknown British Soldier.. The British Cemetery - Bayeux, France

 German Hetzer Tank Destroyer... I think.

German Panther with a shell hole in the right side of the turret that probably killed it.

Operation Overlord Cookies.  Deliciously liberating!

The American Cemetery Visitors Center - Omaha Beach

This has been my obligatory June 6th rant.  On the way back to America, some pimply-faced World War II vets called me a fag.  I'm way behind updating this space with Metal and Lock 'N Loll stuff... Writer's block is a bitch.  Stay tuned and let's see if I get my word mojo back. Until then, remember and commemorate this day:

Nuts!

The Battle of The Bulge is still Umlaut's favorite Holiday event... and earlier this week I was lucky enough to be back in New Orleans and made my 3rd visit to the awesome National World War II Museum where they had a special "Holiday" exhibit set up.

(All pics and caption by Umlaut)

History Geeks RULE... Dog bless us, every one. Happy Holidays and THANKS for the support you've given this space over the years. It means alot... really... "NUTS!"

Iron Maiden has yet to write a song about The Bulge... just saying.

The Pacific

Umlaut's Inner World War 2 / History Geek lost it when he read this report on Slash Film:

Executive produced by Steven Spielberg and from the creators of “Band of Brothers”, The Pacific is a 10-part HBO mini-series which tells the intertwined stories of three Marines, Robert Leckie (played by James Badge Dale), Eugene Sledge (Joe Mazzello) and John Basilone (Jon Seda), during America’s battle with the Japanese in the Pacific during World War II.

Produced on a budget of more $150 million, and shot on location in Australia, the series follows (from an early press release) "The extraordinary experiences of these men and their fellow Marines take them from the first clash with the Japanese in the haunted jungles of Guadalcanal, through the impenetrable rain forests of Cape Gloucester, across the blasted coral strongholds of Peleliu, up the black sand terraces of Iwo Jima, through the killing fields of Okinawa, to the triumphant, yet uneasy, return home after V-J Day.”

THE PACIFIC is based on the books “With the Old Breed,” by Eugene Sledge, which was hailed by historian Paul Fussell as “one of the finest memoirs to emerge from any war,” and “Helmet for My Pillow,” by Robert Leckie (recipient of the Marine Corps Combat Correspondents Annual Award), as well as original interviews conducted by the filmmakers. Continuing the World War II oral history work begun by his father Stephen E. Ambrose (author of the book “Band of Brothers”), Hugh Ambrose serves as a consultant on the miniseries.

The fact that With The Old Breed was used as source material is enough to sell me on this production. It's one of the most terrifying, riveting, and well-written books you could possibly read about the horror humans can bring upon other humans... and it has a back story that is just as compelling: The author (Eugene Sledge) kept a journal during his time in combat in The Pacific despite regulations that forbade Marines from doing so; Sledge secretly kept his notes in a copy of the New Testament. Sledge then spent the better part of 40 years turning his notes into a book. Ken Burns quoted from With The Old Breed extensively in his documentary series The War.

Also, according to everything Umlaut has read, the "right" people are involved in this production as well, which gives me hope this series will be done right... By "right people" I mean Spielberg to the Band Of Brothers crew to Stephen Ambrose's son.. By "done right" I mean the story will hopefully pull no punches... It will be violent.. It will be brutal.. It will be terrifying... It will NOT be politically correct. It should be offensive because war is offensive to any civilized, rational person; war is humans at their absolute worst and debased and it should not be taken lightly. War is not a bloodless video game, and hopefully The Pacific will be as eloquent and inspiring (and honest) as Band Of Brothers was in portraying these truths.

Click HERE to see a preview clip of The Pacific from Australian t.v... and for related Umlaut rants revisit:

• 3 Days Of The Geek (March 2007)
• The Good War > The War (October 2007)

Those who fail to learn from History are doomed to listen to crap music.

Homecoming

Longtime readers of this space know that Umlaut is a History Geek.

Skychick's father served in World War II as a medic with the 84th Division (The Railsplitters). He was awarded the Silver Star, the Purple Heart, and other commendation during combat in Belgium and Germany in 1944-45.

For years the medals and citations were on display at Skychick's parents' house and had probably been framed sometime in the 70's. I'm only guessing at the era because of the awful orange VELVET that the items were mounted on. ORANGE VELVET?! WTF..


The first time Umlaut saw the medals I was horrified that such historical items were (1) framed in such a horrible and tacky way and (2) they were hanging in a house occupied by 2 chain smokers. Who knows what kind of damage these precious items sustained in that environment over the years!

Fast forward to the 21st Century and Skychick came to inherit the beloved frame honoring her dad's heroism and service. They were eventually relocated to the safe geek confines of Casa de Umlaut.

I kept nagging Skychick that this heirloom needed to be properly preserved with framing and mounting techniques that met museum standards. Umlaut became kind of obsessed with it and I'd go off on mini rants like "OMFG the UV rays from the sunlight are destroying the documents!!"... but I only spoke the truth.

Thankfully, the Umlaut Nation has members with an astounding variety of skills and professions. We were able to consult with Umlaut friend Heather on the subject and benefited from her knowledge, experience, and skills in the field of archiving and framing. It was also a huge relief that the treasured items could be left in the care of a trusted friend instead of at some anonymous frame shop... and Heather did a FANTASTIC job!


The difference between the original framing and Heather's museum quality work is astounding.. 100% archival materials throughout... linen background.. UV protection.. etc. etc. The items have finally been given their proper respect. Everytime I look at the frame now I'm amazed that such a piece of history hangs in Casa de Umlaut; I almost want to salute it...

On another WW2 Geek note: Holy shit, dude! Band Of Brothers on Blu-ray is astounding!

The Band Of Brothers episode 'Bastogne' is very profound at Casa de Umlaut since it follows the story of the unit's medic Eugene Roe. Not only because the story follows a medic during The Battle of The Bulge (which mirrors the experience of Skychick's dad), but also because Roe was from Louisiana, just like Skychick and her family. Eerie!

Click HERE to see Umlaut's geek photos from the National World War II Museum.

The Geeks shall inherit The Earth.

Savings For Private Ryan

Sears and the U.S. Army recently announced a licensing deal for a sportswear line based on the legendary First Infantry Division ("The Big Red One"). Of course, all royalties generated by sales will go to the Army and reportedly will fund recruiting and personnel retention programs...

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

Sears Announces Launch of All American Army Brand First Infantry Collection
A Salute to Style and Substance of U.S. Military

HOFFMAN ESTATES, Ill.
Sept. 2, 2008
PRNewswire

Sears announced today the launch of All American Army Brand's First Infantry Division collection. The classic American sportswear collection inspired by the oldest and most illustrious division of the U.S. Army, the First Infantry Division collection will debut in 550 Sears stores nationwide and on Sears.com in October.

The Army Brand's First Infantry Division collection for men, women and boys represents the first time the U.S. Army has officially licensed the use of its marks and insignias, reflecting two centuries of proud tradition and rich heritage. Vintage inspired design, intricate attention to detail, and supreme quality standards, inspired by Army technology, will offer a timeless and authentic collection.

"Army Brand is proud to launch the first apparel collection officially licensed by the U.S. Army. Every design carries the Army seal of approval," said Robert McGuinness, a company executive. "Embracing the diversity of the U.S. Army through various Divisions, each Army Brand collection will be comprised of authentic lifestyle reinterpretations of the supreme fit, classic design, and rugged performance of regulation uniforms and military issued gear. We are excited to launch our First Infantry Division collection exclusively at Sears this fall."

"For the first time, the U.S. Army has granted a license to the All American Army Brand, a well established designer and manufacturer of apparel, allowing use of official Army marks and insignias in its new specially created apparel collections," said a spokesperson for the U.S. Army. "By incorporating the Army's timeless traditions with iconic styling and unparalleled standards for performance, fit and function, consumers can wear the pride they feel for our troops. We are especially pleased that the First Infantry collection will launch at Sears in keeping with the company's tradition of supporting the U.S. military through its Heroes at Home program."

The Army Brand collections will also give back to those who have given so much in service to the United States. The license fee paid by Army Brand is used to support programs that benefit the well-being of the troops and their families.

Army Brand's well-priced First Infantry Division collection offers opening price points for t-shirts at $11.99. Hoodies range in price from $29.99 to $44.99. Denim is priced at $25.99 and outerwear ranges between $35.99 and $119.99. The outerwear styles are highlighted because of their authentic iconic silhouettes that enhance the coordinating knits, woven sweaters and bottoms.

"Over the years, military-inspired clothing has played a distinct role in shaping fashion trends," said Craig Israel, Senior Vice President, Sears Holding Corporation and President, Sears Apparel. "We are now able to exclusively offer a line that is pure to the origins of that inspiration. Our commitment to the All American Army Brand is evident in its prominence in our Fall Forward fashion exhibit, held September 10 during the week of the 2008 Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week. It will also be apparent in numerous marketing campaigns going forward, including those planned for the holiday season, and in the store experience."

About Sears, Roebuck and Co.

Sears, Roebuck and Co., a wholly owned subsidiary of Sears Holdings Corporation (Nasdaq: SHLD), is a leading broadline retailer providing merchandise and related services. Sears, Roebuck offers its wide range of home merchandise, clothing and automotive products and services through more than 2,400 Sears-branded and affiliated stores in the United States and Canada, which includes approximately 935 full-line and 1,100 specialty stores in the U.S. Sears, Roebuck also offers a variety of merchandise and services through sears.com, landsend.com, and specialty catalogs. Sears, Roebuck offers consumers leading proprietary brands including Kenmore, Craftsman, DieHard and Lands' End -- among the most trusted and preferred brands in the U.S. The company is the nation's largest provider of home services, with more than 13 million service calls made annually. For more information, visit the Sears, Roebuck website at http://www.sears.com or the Sears Holdings Corporation website at http://www.searsholdings.com.

About All American Army Brand

All American Army Brand is a designer and manufacturer of men's, women's and children's apparel. They are officially licensed by the U.S. Army to use all of the marks and insignias of the U.S. Army. Army Brand ensures that the use and combination of these marks and insignias are translated in the designs, fabrications, quality standards, and authenticity criteria of the U.S. Army for the official U.S. Army seal of approval. For more information, visit the All American Army Brand website at http://www.armybrand.com.

SOURCE Sears, Roebuck and Co.

Click HERE for a story about the controversy swirling around this venture.

The First Division is the oldest unit in the U.S. Army and its legendary 91-year history includes leading the D-Day landings on Omaha Beach... and its ranks once included Luke Skywalker. Given its reputation, I'm sure The Big Red One will lead Sears customers to savings here in the 21st Century with bayonets fixed.

The 1st Division storms Omaha Beach - June 6, 1944

Hopefully Sears customers won't suffer the same 60% casualty rate that some of the First Division's units suffered on June 6, 1944... For next Summer, Umlaut suggests that Sears use the famous Omaha Beach quote from the Division's Col. George Taylor in their ad campaign:

"Two kinds of people are staying on this beach! The dead and those who are going to die!"

Brilliant, right? Umlaut should do this for a living...

Day Of Days 2008

Despite it's somewhat rambling nature, this post shall serve, in its own way, as Umlaut's annual remembrance of The Day Of Days.

Umlaut's record collection contains a variety of different music, but his heart and soul will always be Metal... and it's things like the following that reinforce my metallic leanings.

Decibel is my favorite Metal publication because of its intelligent writing, its insightful choice of subjects for articles (such as the definitive story about the recording of Sleep's Jerusalem album), its sense of humor, and also because the staff knows that Metal fans tend to be intellectual and introspective beings who have more about them than simply loud Satanic music. Case in point is this article from the July 2008 issue:


The article is about the new collection of Bill Mauldin's legendary WWII comics Willie & Joe. I won't bother to educate the newbies about who Bill Mauldin was (Wiki him!)... but needless to say every WW2 Geek like Umlaut knows who I'm talking about. I bet Steve Harris has already ordered his copy.

"Your task will not be an easy one. Your enemy is well trained, well equipped and battle hardened. He will fight savagely."

Ironically, on The Day Before The Day Of Days, Umlaut received the copy of MOH: Airborne that he'd ordered.


Which way is Sainte-Mère-Église? Those who fail to learn from History are doomed to listen to crap music.. Speaking of which, the night before The Day Of Days it was:

Dethklok
The Fillmore, San Francisco
June 5, 2008

This show was brutally sold out in advance.. Not bad for a virtual band! Dethklok are WAY more brutal than that other virtual band Gorillaz... WAY.

Timo picked me up at 8:50PM.. However, on Fillmore St., a block from the venue, we encountered an SFPD roadblock... So we drove around to Geary and when we turned the corner we encountered several SFPD cars, a fire truck, AND a PG&E truck parked in front of The Fillmore... as well as dozens of people, all dressed in black, milling around out front. Not a good sign.

After scoring a parking space we walked up to The Fillmore's entrance and were told the show was cancelled due to "power outtage issues". WTF.. I called Takoyaki to tell her the show was cancelled and she was, like, "WTF" too.... WTF!

It was also hella windy, dude. .. HELLA WINDY!! On the way back to the car, some pimply-faced teenagers called us fags. Timo drove me back home and I walked back into the house at 9:46PM. At 10:29PM the local news reported that an electrical fire had broken out in The Fillmore during the opening band's set and the sold out venue had been evacuated!! Wow... Umlaut and Timo missed being caught up in the action by mere minutes.. Cue scary memories of The Great White Fire dancing through my head.

Virtual WW2 combat... Virtual Metal band... Hmmm.. It's a good thing the red wine I'm drinking as I type this isn't virtual... and I'm happy Timo and I missed The Fillmore Fire drama... 'cause no one likes to shove women and children out of the way in order to save their own skin... unless it's necessary of course.

Postscript: Dethklok posted a message on their website regarding The Fillmore early on the morning of The Day Of Days:

Friday, June 06, 2008

SF Show at the FILLMORE CANCELLED BECAUSE OF FIRE

Last night June 5th a small electrical fire stopped the DETHKLOK show from happening- everyone was evacuated safely and most importantly NO ONE WAS hurt.

The band was ready and excited to play especially because the Fillmore is an amazing and legendary kick ass venue. Ultimately the cops/fire department deemed the situation unsafe to perform and cancelled the show- not the band, not the venue but the cops. The band was incredibly disappointed to find they couldn't play. But again most importantly NOBODY GOT HURT.

The people in suits are trying to find out what to do- hopefully there will be a rescheduled show. do please check with THE FILLMORE'S website as they will be posting news as it comes to them.

Thanks to all the fans who remained incredibly cool, collected, and understanding during a possibly dangerous situation.

Sincerely,
Charles Offdensen

Bastogne

For the sake of originality, Umlaut usually avoids reposting items from other blogs... but today was a good day at work.. which put me in a good mood.. so I'm making an exception: Over at the Marvel Comics site you can Create Your Own Super Hero. Umlaut's Super Hero is Bastogne:

Bastogne's fate was determined on a bitterly cold winter day in Belgium in 1944... His female companion and partner is Malmedy and their adventures will, of course, involve battling Nazis and their wicked Space Alien allies... as well as the forces of the Empire of Japan, which will be portrayed with historically accurate 1940's racial stereotypes.

Stay tuned...

Panzerfaust

This week in random WW2 references:

Umlaut: So, you're plotting a going away thing for Takoyaki?

T-XIII: The plan is Suppenküche next Friday.

Umlaut: NICE, my friend.. Suppenküche is wunderbah.. especially the giant glass boot 'o beer... Luftwaffe.

T-XIII: I can’t think of any place better for a farewell party, and she says she’s never had Deutsche food!

Umlaut: You know she's vegetarian, right?

T-XIII: They have options! Kartoffelsuppe, salat und apfeltorten. Also, blutwurst!

Umlaut: They all sound like German anti-tank weapons circa 1944-45..

T-XIII: German has that tendency. Spätzle!

Umlaut: Vergeltungswaffe!

T-XIII: All I really know is Luftwaffe and Wehrmacht and Schutzstaffel. Oh, and Totenkopf. And putsch!

Umlaut: Everything I know I learned from ZEE SCORPIONS!

The Cooler King

Umlaut is whistling the movie's theme song in tribute to Mr. James... Click HERE to whistle along with me. C'MON ENGLAND!!

Also, if I can find my baseball mitt and ball, I'll go sit in my closet and play catch for awhile as well.

British 'Great Escape' Pilot Dies at 92

By ROBERT BARR, Associated Press Writer
Thursday, January 31, 2008
12:09 PST LONDON, United Kingdom (AP)

A funeral service was held Thursday for Bertram "Jimmy" James, one of the few British prisoners to avoid being executed for joining in the "great escape" from a German prison in World War II.

James, who was 92, died Jan. 18 at Royal Shrewsbury Hospital in Shrewsbury, in central England, following a brief illness.

He was a pilot on a Wellington bomber that was shot down near Rotterdam in the Netherlands on June 5, 1940, and was captured the next day. Despite numerous attempts to escape, he spent five years as a prisoner of war.

Attempting to escape, he once remarked, "was our contribution to the war effort." He made 13 attempts from various prisons, according to military historian Howard Tuck.

James was sent to Stalag Luft III, near Zagan in Poland, in 1943.

Joining in plans for a mass escape, James was put in charge of dispersing some 40 tons of sand taken from one tunnel.

On the night of March 24, 1944, James was the 39th man to escape. He and a Greek companion made their railway station and caught a train headed toward the Czech border, but were recaptured two days later.

"When you emerge into the snow and you're running away from the camp, there's a sense of exhilaration," James told The Associated Press in 2004 during celebrations of the 60th anniversary of the escape.

"We were on our way, we hoped, to freedom," he added. "That wasn't quite the case."

All but three of the 76 escapers were recaptured, and 50 were shot.

The escape attempt from Stalag Luft III was one of the most celebrated incidents of the war, recounted in the film starring Steve McQueen and Richard Attenborough.

"A lot was Hollywood fantasy. There were no Americans in the escape," James said.

After being caught, James was one of eight men sent to the Sachsenhausen concentration camp just outside Berlin. He escaped from that prison in 1944 but was recaptured two weeks later.

He learned Russian during his imprisonment, and served in the diplomatic service from 1964-1975.

James is survived by his wife, Madge.

The Undead Anzio Riot Grrrls

WARNING: This piece can best be described as "rambling".

I can't remember the last time I read a horror novel, but over the holiday break I read World War Z by Max Brooks. It's great mind candy: An oral history of The Zombie War... Remember that? When humans were forced to the brink of extinction by the undead? Me 'neither... but it's a fun, well-written account of that time in human history. Of course, the zombie outbreak started in China.. You can't trust Chinks.. ever.

Anyway, the part that sealed my fandom of World War Z is during an "interview" with an American soldier about the tactics used late in the war to draw the zombies out into the open so humans could avoid close combat with the undead; besides the smell of living flesh, Zombies are drawn to sound... So the various armies around the globe used loud sounds to attract the undead into open areas where they could be easily mowed down by firearms. The British Army used bagpipes, the Chinese used bugles, the South Africans used old Zulu war chants... and what sound did American troops use to draw zombies to their killing zones??

Dude, they blasted 'The Trooper' by Iron Maiden over loud speakers!! Fucking brilliant, right?!

The American soldier says in his "interview" that he realized the song was chosen to psych the human troops up as much as to draw the undead out of hiding. He says:

"Right about the time Dickinson was belting "As you plunge into a certain death" I was pumped, SIR (Standard Infantry Rifle) charged and ready, eyes fixed on this glowing, closing horde. I was, like, "C'mon, Zack (slang for Zombies), let's fuckin' do this!"

You know, given the magnitude of The Zombie War and the lasting effect it had on humanity, I would expect there would be way more books and documentaries about it. I suppose the subject is still too painful for most humans to face, but I'm sure The History Channel will lead us towards the healing power of remembrance and nostalgia merchandising. If only I could remember where I was during the conflict.

Anyway...

Hey! Nobody told me Rick Atkinson's new book came out back in October! WTF... I've been waiting almost 5 years for the 2nd volume of his Liberation Trilogy to be published!

The Day Of Battle: The War in Sicily and Italy, 1943-1944 had Umlaut staging a nighttime stealth mission via the Prius to the nearest bookstore that was not unlike the predawn glider missions of D-Day.. Also, not unlike a Bangalore torpedo sliding under a barbed wire barrier on Omaha Beach, I slid under the cover price thanks to the store's 20% off sale price on the book.

Yes, there are a million books written about WW2... but Atkinson's writing sets him apart from most of the other WW2 Geeks. The 1st volume of his trilogy (An Army At Dawn: The War in North Africa, 1942-1943) won the Pulitzer Prize for History in 2003 and it was sort of a revelation when I read it. While most books of this nature are as dry as El Alamein, Atkinson's background (a Master's Degree in English Literature and editor at The Washington Post) gives him a command of the English language that allows him to make his subjects, like, come to life. Dude, he's like a Field Marshall of the written word. When it comes right down to it, Umlaut is mainly an ETO Geek at heart.

(That sound you hear is the yawning of readers as they click away from this space...)

For those of you still reading this space, these are the WW2 books that have influenced my inner WW2 Geek the most:

• A Bridge Too Far (1966)- Cornelius Ryan.
  
• Citizen Soldiers (1997) - Stephen A. Ambrose.
• Flags Of Our Fathers (2000) - James Bradley.
• God Is My Co-Pilot (1943) - Robert L. Scott.
  
• The Good War (1984) - Studs Terkel.
• Guadalcanal Diary (1943) - Richard Tregaskis.
• History Of World War II: Armed Services Memorial Edition (1945) - Edited by Frances Miller with A Board of Historical and Military Authorities.
• The Longest Day (1959) - Cornelius Ryan.
• The Mighty Eighth (1970) - Roger A. Freeman.
• The Ragged, Rugged Warriors (1966) - Martin Caiden.

To clarify, these books "influenced" me the most and aren't necessarily "the best" WW2 books; the majority of these I read when I was a kid... However, of all these books, the History Of World War II: Armed Services Memorial Edition is easily the single most influential title on the list.

Evidently, a copy of the book was given to every person who was in the U.S. Armed Forces between 1941-45; my dad's copy is still in perfect condition even after 62 years. He was presented with his copy (along with a World War 2 Victory Medal) due to his stint in the U.S. Navy from 1945-47. As a kid, the History Of World War II: Armed Services Memorial Edition was like the family bible to me; I was in awe of the 966-page tome and I read through its pages endlessly during my formative years.

As I was typing this piece, I couldn't remember the exact title of the book so I called my dad to get the correct title and publication details. After giving me the info I needed, my dad said I should just take the book home with me the next time I visit... DOH! It was not unlike my dad giving me his ENIGMA Machine!

Oh yeah... The other day I was at Amoeba Records to use a gift certificate that I'd gotten for Christmas. When I handed the Indie Rock Chick cashier my selections (The Essential Glenn Miller and Dead Moon- Echoes of the Past) they elicited a confused look from her.

As Indie Rock Chick filled out a credit slip for my gift certificate balance she signed her name with the K Records logo (How 1991 of her, right?) and before bagging my selections she held them up and commented "These are so.... different..."

At that point I almost played the grumpy old WW2 Geek and said "Riot Grrrl, it's no different than the 82nd Airborne's FUBAR during the invasion of Sicily and the FUBAR that was Operation Market Garden"... but instead I simply replied with a smile. I suppose I probably should have commented on the K Records logo to prove *my* Indie cred ("Hey! Kurt Cobain had that tattoo!") but I didn't.. 'cause, like, I just don't give a shit about it anymore. If Cobain had been in WW2 Patton would have slapped him anyway.

Speaking of K Records: Back in May I mentioned in this space that my cousin was running for mayor of Olympia, WA. Well, guess what? In November he won the election with 70% of the vote: Click HERE for his official bio. Ironic... Hilarious.. Weird! So, don't fuck with me Riot Grrrls 'cause Umlaut's kin is The Mayor 'til 2011.. and The Mayor is also a drummer. Kill Rock Stars... all of them.. cue some Sleater-Kinney.

Epilogue: Zombies > World War II > Riot Grrrls.. Rambling, wasn't it?

The Good War > The War

Unless I've missed something, I'm shocked that no one seems to have made the connection between Ken Burns' recent World War 2 documentary The War and Studs Terkel's 1984 book The Good War.


Studs Terkel was already a well-known author and historian when he published his book. In 1985 I was working in a bookstore when Terkel's book won the Pulitzer Prize for Non-Fiction. Being a WW2 Geek I eagerly read it and I was completely blown away. It completely changed my perception of the Second World War. To borrow a description from a review ('cause I'm too lazy to think of one myself), Terkel "challenged the prevailing notion that, in contrast to the Vietnam era, World War II was a time of unblemished national solidarity, goodwill, and unified purpose."

Terkel's book, just like Burns' documentary, is an oral history of the war years and the stories are just as astounding and riveting. However, besides combat veterans and folks back home, Terkel also interviewed witnesses and participants from other varied aspects of the war, both Allied and Axis military and civilians, including Germans, Russians and Japanese. In one chapter he interviewed Japanese survivors and members of the American bomber crews from Hiroshima and Nakasaki. In another chapter he interviewed German survivors and members of the American bomber crews from the bombings of Germany. Profound stuff.

However, the most extraordinary part of Terkel's book is that he also sought out and interviewed people who give a perspective on The War that I doubt was ever documented before.. such as war profiteers who made money on the black market in the States, pacifists who refused to serve in the military, minority soldiers describing the racism they encountered from their fellow countrymen, and homosexuals describing their persecution during The War (YES there WERE Gays back then! I know... shocking! I thought Gays were created by Disco in the 70's myself..).

Terkel presented stunning revelations to this World War 2 geek who had read all of the standard WW2 books and seen all of the WW2 documentaries. Of course, these books and films had created the common ideal over the years that WW2 was somehow a "clean" war.. a noble time.. "The Good War". However, War is War... It's brutal beyond imagination and it brings out the absolute worst in humans, both on the front lines and elsewhere. That's why it's war... and, you know what, even back in "The Good 'Ol Days" there was a seamy underbelly of society... It wasn't all white picket fences, crisp suits, and everyone united to defeat the Axis. Humans were Humans back then too. This sentiment was echoed in Burns' documentary as well.. It wasn't "The Good War".. It was "The Worst War".

For the Music Geeks, The Good War is written and presented in the same style as Please Kill Me... Although a lot of people die in Please Kill Me, WAY more people die in The Good War.. Just so you know... 1-2-3-4.

The most profound similarity for me between Terkel and Burns is that Terkel actually interviewed Eugene Sledge, whose compelling words from his combat memoir With The Old Breed drives much of Burns' documentary. As the story goes, one reason why Burns chose Mobile, Alabama for The War was because of Sledge, who (against regulations) secretly kept a haunting and unflinching journal during his time in combat in the Pacific. Unfortunately, Sledge passed away before Burns could meet him.. but as a result he met his best friend who was interviewed extensively by Burns... It's interesting to this History Geek that Terkel was able to interview Sledge for his book 20 years or so before Burns.

Now, I'm not saying Burns copped anything from Terkel; the two works are like twin sons of different mothers.. All I'm saying is if you're a History / World War 2 Geek like Umlaut, who was swept up in watching The War, you should also read The Good War as a companion to complete your time machine experience and education. Those who fail to learn from history are doomed to listen to crap music.

Yes, there will be a quiz.

His War, My War

Last weekend Skychick and I saw the Blue Angels perform over San Francisco Bay again, but this time we watched them from the middle of The Bay aboard the World War II transport ship the S.S. Jeremiah O'Brien. Watching the air show from that perspective, on that ship, was nothing short of fucking awesome.

Trivia: The O'Brien is the only surviving ship from the 6,900 ship armada that stormed Normandy on D-Day. WOW.

Yes, yes the Blue Angels are a sexy recruiting tool for the Navy and the military industrial establishment is bullshit... but it annoys me that certain special interest Hippie Shit groups can't simply appreciate the history and skill displayed by these pilots. They fly their jets in formation as close as 18 INCHES apart.. 18 FUCKING INCHES! I can't cut a 6 inch straight line with a pair of scissors. Whatever... I've loved watching the Blue Angels perform since I was a little kid.

Program from Air Show '77
Moffett Field, Mt. View, CA - July 1977
(From the Umlaut Archives)

The Summer of '77 sure was badass; my Summer of Star Wars, KISS, and the Blue Angels! Growing up in Sunnyvale, CA meant my parents' house was only 5 miles from Moffett Field, which meant when the Blue Angels made their annual visit we had easy access to them. During their runs the jets would blast directly over my house! Pretty cool, right?

Trivia: The Blue Angels started visiting Moffett Field in the 1950's and continued to perform there until 1992. Ironically, 1992 also marked when Umlaut started his stint working at Moffett Field. Irony!

Whenever I see the Blue Angels perform, I think of my Dad. He couldn't make it to see them with me this year due to scheduling commitments. He's still a busy guy!

Yes, my Dad and I butted heads quite a bit when I was a teenager, but he was the person who gave me an appreciation of History and who created my inner World War 2 Geek. In 1945, as soon as he graduated from high school, he enlisted in the U.S. Navy because he wanted to contribute to the war effort. He was 17 years old and initially stationed aboard the battleship USS Maryland.

Trivia: Prior to my dad signing up, the Maryland was a survivor of Pearl Harbor and had participated in major battles, including Saipan, Leyte Gulf, and Okinawa. The ship was hit twice by kamikaze planes in 1944-45.

Later, my dad was stationed on a submarine chaser, the PC-1080 nicknamed Hell Hornet, and was steaming towards Japan when the A-bombs were dropped. It's certain that my dad would have seen combat if the invasion of Japan had gone as planned. I'm sure my dad wishes he had been older and participated in combat, but fate only had him old enough to be in the wartime Navy for the Summer of '45... but he served his country. Of course, if he had seen combat there's a chance I might not be here typing this. I chew on that sometimes.

At 17-years old my Dad left his small Central California hometown and found himself on a warship during The War. My late uncle once said that my Dad left home for the Navy as a boy and came back a man. When I was 17-years old I was listening to Heavy Metal bands thinking METAL was my war... and I still live my life in a state of retarded maturity.

My Dad is a badass Chink.

This Week In World War 2 Geek

Flags Of Our Fathers is one of the best books Umlaut has ever read; the movie version was not so good. This week, the last survivor of the first Iwo Jima flag raising (Not the iconic one that was filmed and photographed later that same day... Read the book!) passed away.

Charles Lindberg; Raised First U.S. Flag at Iwo Jima

By Chris Williams
Associated Press
Tuesday, June 26, 2007

Charles W. Lindberg, 86, one of the U.S. Marines who raised the first American flag over Iwo Jima during World War II, died June 24 at Fairview Southdale Hospital in the Minneapolis suburb of Edina. No cause of death was reported.

Mr. Lindberg spent decades explaining that it was his patrol, not the one captured in the famous Associated Press photograph by Joe Rosenthal, that raised the first flag as U.S. forces fought to take the Japanese island.

In the late morning of Feb. 23, 1945, Mr. Lindberg fired his flamethrower into enemy pillboxes at the base of Mount Suribachi and then joined five other Marines fighting their way to the top. He was awarded the Silver Star for bravery.

"Two of our men found this big, long pipe there," he said in an interview with the Associated Press in 2003. "We tied the flag to it, took it to the highest spot we could find and we raised it.

"Down below, the troops started to cheer, the ship's whistles went off; it was just something that you would never forget," he said. "It didn't last too long, because the enemy started coming out of the caves."

The moment was captured by Sgt. Lou Lowery, a photographer from the Marine Corps' Leatherneck magazine.

Three of the men in the first raising never saw their photos. They were among the more than 6,800 U.S. servicemen killed in the five-week battle for the island.

By Mr. Lindberg's account, his commander ordered the first flag replaced and safeguarded because he worried someone would take it as a souvenir. Mr. Lindberg was back in combat when six men raised the second, larger flag about four hours later.

Rosenthal's photo of the second flag-raising became one of the most enduring images of the war and the model for the U.S. Marine Corps memorial in Washington.

Rosenthal, who died last year, always denied accusations that he staged the photo, and he never claimed it depicted the first raising of a flag over the island.

Mr. Lindberg was shot through the arm March 1 and evacuated. After his discharge in 1946, Mr. Lindberg went home to Grand Forks, N.D. He moved to Richfield, Minn., in 1951 and became an electrician.

No one, he said, believed him when he said he raised the first flag at Iwo Jima. "I was called a liar," he said. In 1954, Mr. Lindberg was invited to Washington for the dedication of the Marine memorial. It carried the names of the second group of flag-raisers, but not the first.

He spent his final years trying to raise awareness of the first flag-raising, speaking to veterans groups and at schools. He sold autographed copies of Lowery's photos through catalogues.

Those who fail to learn from History are doomed to listen to crap music.

Overlord

Sixty-three years ago today.

If you don't know what I'm talking about I'll do what I always do when I encounter indifference about History: Exclaim "What the fuck...", shake my head in dismay, and walk away to rant about it in this space.

Those who fail to learn from History are doomed to listen to crap music.

• 06/06/06
• The Longest Day
• Umlaut @ The National World War II Museum
  

On a Music Geek note, Umlaut's Favorite WW2 Songs are:

• Aces High - Iron Maiden
• Angel Of Death - Slayer
• Bomber - Motörhead
• Chattanooga Choo Choo - Glenn Miller & His Orchestra
  
• I Was A Kamikazi Pilot - Hoodoo Gurus
• I'll Be Seeing You - Tommy Dorsey & His Orchestra
  
• The Longest Day - Iron Maiden
• ME 262 - Blue Öyster Cult
  
• Sentimental Journey - Les Brown & His Orchestra
• The Messerschmitt Pilot's Severed Hand - Thee Headcoats
• We'll Meet Again - Benny Goodman & His Orchestra

FLASH.... THUNDER.

Phucked

A tanker truck fire destroyed part of the MacArthur Maze in Oakland this morning. East Bay A-Go-Go!

I'm On Fire. Fight Fire With Fire. Fire Down Under. Flaming Guitar Fire. Quest For Fire. Fire In The Sky. Shot Down In Flames. Firewind. Flaming Telepaths. Fire, Fire. White Heat, Red Hot.

===
Sunday, 04/29 - 11:26AM

A disturbing update from the East Bay via Umlaut's Old Metal friend Chris S.:

"Ya, we're way PHUCKED!!! They should have it all fixed by Monday morning, right?

But anyways, you WWII history geek! I got a B-17 Super Fortress that keeps flying over my house. Yesterday we saw a B-25. Laura saw a ZERO, ZEKE, MEATBALL, KAMAKAZI the other day. Oh shit, here it comes again...Gotta get to my bomb shelter now!!!"

HOLY SHIT!

I think we're missing the big picture here, people! The destruction of the freeway seems to be the result of a disruption in the space-time continuum (!!) and is probably the first strike of an invasion by forces from the 1940's!!!

We better get our 21st Century forces mobilized ASAP or we'll all be singing Glenn Miller songs by Memorial Day!!

Is that the Chattanooga Choo Choo!?

===
Sunday, 04/29 - 1:03PM

Another disturbing update about the East Bay from Umlaut's Old Metal friend Hiro:

"I've seen all of the above airplanes over the last few days. I work right next to the Hayward Airport and it seems I've seen a P-51 Mustang, B-17 or B-25 quad prop war plane, no Zeros but I've also seen WW1 biplanes like the Red Baron's..

When I visited my grandma years ago in rural Japan, she had a wall size poster issued by the Imperial government of Japan (prewar) of the silhouettes of the American planes to forewarn the Japanese citizens of the bomb raids.

I wish I'd kept that."

A WW1 biplane!? Holy crap!! It's obvious that the World Wars (1 AND 2) are using a wormhole to travel to their future and teach us all a lesson about what a "real" war is all about.

I wish Hiro had kept his grandma's WW2 air raid poster too... Who knows what we could have done with some advance warning of this invasion!! We've gotten lazy in our 21st Century ways and I think we're about to pay the price.

Game over, man.. Game over.

3 Days of The Geek

Last week I attended 3 events that represented the Holy Trinity of what Umlaut is about: Rock Geek > History Geek > Geek. Coincidentally, the 3rd event fell on the 3rd day of the month, which was also the day that the first full lunar eclipse in 3 years was occurring.... 3-3-3... and if you multiply that by 2.... Oh Lord, yeah!

Fu Manchu / Valient Thorr
Slim's, S.F.
February 28, 2007

I realized halfway into their set that I've been seeing Fu Manchu live for over a decade. The mongoose flies on by, man... The Fu still delivers onstage and I dare anyone not to boogie when they slam into 'King Of The Road'.

Backing up for a sec: Valient Thorr's brand of Rock N' Roll was fine for awhile; I kept thinking about Raging Slab during their set. However, their sorta homeless guy singer got all hippie and jumped into the crowd and told everyone to sit on the floor around him as a display of solidarity.... I understood it to be a display of solidarity against The War and for Rock N' Roll... Uhh, ookaay. I kept standing.. Fuck that Hippie Shit.

Now back to Fu: The band went through a rough patch since their last tour, so it's very cool they're back in the saddle again with a new record label, a great new album, and a world tour. The Rock Godz smile.

Something I've noticed at the last couple of Fu shows is there have been a few dudes (2-3 at a time) who sing along to every song.. However, most of the time they're not singing at the stage, but at each other. Must be some male bonding thing that I haven't been privy too... sorta like playing grab ass in the locker room shower or something; it's not gay, only latently homoerotic. "So put the keys in my hand.. IN MY HAND.."

A Rock band will not save the world, but it can effectively take your mind off the world for 75 minutes or so. For the record, the new songs stood up to the live test and my fave Fu song was played ('Squash That Fly'). For the geeks: The final song of the night was the Fu classic 'Superbird'... which was, like, SOLID.

I forgot to do a merch tally... my bad. On the way back to the car, some pimply-faced teenagers called us fags. By my count, this was my 42nd visit to Slim's since 1988 (the year it opened).

Useless Trivia in My Head: For several years, Fu Manchu's tour manager was the infamous Richard Cole.

48 hours later it was:

Ken Burns’ THE WAR, Part One
Letterman Digital Arts Center, S.F.
March 2, 2007

Miatomic and Umlaut have a long history of shared geek moments, but this one might have been the most profound: (1) Ken Burns was screening the first 2 hours of his new documentary on World War 2 and (2) The event was held in the theater at the new Lucasfilm facility, which for both of us was like visiting the new house of an ex-luvah, although that was a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away.

The idea of Ken Burns doing for WW2 what he did for Jazz and Beisbol sent my geek meter into the red. Now, before you accuse me of being a War Monger or some other simplistic PC archetype, I will cut you off at the knees and knee you in the face by stating that I am a History Geek. History fascinates me and I was interested in WW2 long before I was a Music Geek. That period in history is a particularly sobering example of how fucked up humans can be to one another... plus some really cool airplanes and tanks were developed to carry out that carnage. Dude, how cool was the Spitfire?! Damn straight.

For the newbies: World War 2 geeks are as self-absorbed and opinionated as the worst Star Wars geeks ("That general shoulda done this".... "That airplane was better than that airplane"... "Their anti-tank weaponry was superior to our's", etc. etc..). Judging from the screening we saw, Burns has brilliantly neutered the geek factor from his WW2 project by not having "experts" pontificating onscreen about the war's strategy, politics, economics, etc.. Brilliant!

His film focuses on the stories of regular people (soldiers and civilians) and their personal experiences in combat and on the homefront. Listening to an old man in the twilight of his life tell his experiences during the horrors of the Bataan Death March as a 17-year old prisoner of war is fucking mind numbing. He's lived with the memories of those horrors for more than 60 years. What were you doing at 17-years old?? Listening to Fugazi with a straight edge "x" on your hand thinking you were changing the world? Fuck that Hippie Shit.

The Q&A session with Burns will rank as one of the intellectual highlights of my year. I've been watching the man's documentaries for years and he came across as articulate, passionate, and humble as I imagined he would be. I also enjoyed how he cut off the questions of the WW2 fanboys when they started to get too self-absorbed.. It was almost like they were testing Burns on his knowledge of "their" subject... "Mr. Burns.. I consider myself a student of World War 2... How would you rank the importance of the ENIGMA Machine to the Allied cause..." blah blah blah.. I'd pay to see an Indian knife fight featuring WW2 Geeks vs. Star Wars Geeks.

I'm counting the days until PBS airs the complete 7-part series in September (the DVD release will follow in December). No matter what your politics, watching these stories of sacrifice and horror during the most violent time of modern history will affect you.

Useless Trivia in My Head: GI's said the muzzle report of the German MG42 machine gun sounded like a sheet being ripped in half.

24 hours later it was:

Wondercon
Moscone Convention Center, S.F.
March 3, 2007

My brain hurt after only 25 minutes... There was way too much nerd energy and not enough shielding on my hull to prevent me from getting contaminated; I had blood draining deja vu of Comicon. In my youth, seeing overweight guys dressed as Boba Fett might have made me laugh in fanboy camaraderie; now it gives me the urge to practice random violence against costumed fanboys.

The obligatory Star Wars "celebrities" were present to reap the cash rewards from nerd wallets. This Con featured Ray Park, Peter Mayhew, and Daniel Logan... and if you can name their SW characters I think I might have to slap you about the neck and face. WAKE UP!

Also, why the fuck can't someone do some cool Cthulhu merchandise??! All of the Cthulhu stuff at these conventions are cutesy and cartoonish; it's so fucking annoying! Cthulhu is TERRIFYING, not CUDDLY! If I see one more Cthulhu plush doll I'm gonna go Yog-Sothoth on someone. Really.

There wasn't nearly enough Battlestar Galactica content at this Con. However, if you're a Lost fan, Umlaut friend David came up with the idea of forming B.A.L.L.S. (Bay Area Lost Lovers Society). I would start watching that lame show again just to join the club.

Geek Moment: While walking down Aisle 700 I noticed a man standing at a booth looking at vintage comics... He was wearing rumpled black jeans, a rumpled black button down shirt, scuffed up shoes, and a rumpled black hat... "16 shells from a thirty-ought six will whittle you into kindling..."

It was fucking Tom Waits!

I made a u-turn to make sure it was him. It was... but I couldn't pull the trigger and go up to him. I had a geek freeze and didn't know what to do for a second so I did the next best thing to bothering one of my musical heroes: I called Ted and told him that Waits was in Dah House.

A vintage Star Trek Hair Salon Playset (Sulu optional)

Some other favorite moments:

• Seeing the guy who played the "crippled" Captain Pike in the STOS (Star Trek: Original Series) episode "The Menagerie". A sign at his booth proudly introduced him as "Sean Kinney - Crippled Captain Pike".
  

• Checking out some cool World War 2 tank models and overhearing the dealer say how he gets shit from some people for doing "historically inaccurate" dioramas featuring Nazi soldiers as zombies.

• I also came across this author at one of the booths:
  

WTF!?? Skychick NEVER told me she was a "New York Times Bestselling" author! It's like I don't even know her.... WTF..

It was a fun afternoon but, man, I am so not into alot of this nerd stuff anymore. I can be around it for awhile, but then all of the inert fanboy energy starts to drain my soul. I've always said "Hope I die before I get old.." but maybe I am when it comes to pop culture detritus.

Useless Trivia in My Head: The next day I was at the pet store and a guy was wearing a Star Wars logo ringer tee and had the Mandalorian insignia tattooed on his forearm. It frightens me that I can still easily recognize that kind of minutiae, even while buying dog food.

Help.