Procreation Of The Wicked

Triptykon / 1349 / Yakuza
Slim's, San Francisco
Rocktober 23, 2010

Art/design: Kevin Gan Yuen // www.viraloptic.com

As rain fell on San Francisco I was nailed to the couch at Casa de Umlaut watching Game 6 of the NLCS swearing at the t.v. as the game's drama went ballistic; it was baseball at its very best! When the Giants finally nailed the coffin on Philadelphia, I was out the door and into the wet night as neighbors set off fireworks (I assume they keep a stockpile of them for such occasions..) and celebrated in the rain-soaked streets. Pretty cool... I'm not necessarily a fan of Jocks, but I am a fan of the GAME of baseball and it's cool how a winning team can inspire a sense of community. What a GREAT way to start the night and what a GREAT night to be in San Francisco and The Bay Area!

I stepped into Slim's as Yakuza were onstage performing their Metal / Jazz / Prog Rock hybrid. The last time I'd seen a "Metal" band have a saxophone onstage was during a horrible Queensryche performance several years back. Can a clarinet and saxophone ever be Metal?? I'm still not sure, but Yakuza make interesting use of the instruments to create an ambient tone in their sound that other bands would create more traditionally with guitar.

Yakuza saxing up Slim's
(Photos courtesy of Sensory Abuse)

It was an interesting and dynamic performance that reminded me of watching bands like Isis and OM. However, my opinion about the wind instruments went back and forth between (1) this is cool to (2) this is a gimmick. Overall, Yakuza earned my respect and at least I didn't pay more attention to the beer in my hand while watching them. However, I can be fairly dogmatic about my Metal... and a dude coming at me with a clarinet will never be as effective as a dude coming at me with a guitar. One time at band camp.....

Those corpse-painted Norwegians 1349 came onstage with dark confidence and I have to say it was the strongest performance I've seen them play to date. Given his work with Satyricon, Frost on drums is the focus of interest for many... but 1349 are a solid presentation across their lineup. As I said after the last time I saw them back in May, 1349 exudes that real deal Norwegian vibe but, let's be honest, if they were from Sacramento and came onstage dressed like that they'd be hilarious. Also, the band's evil aura was somewhat diminished by the young girls shouting "I LOVE YOU!" at vocalist Ravn in between songs. CUTE.

1349 seducing Slim's
(Photo courtesy of Sensory Abuse)

This was a co-headlining tour (with Triptykon and 1349 switching off headlining slots each night) so the Norwegians played a full 70-75 minute set. To be honest, they came out of the gate very strong for me as I watched them from down front... but by the end of their set I could be found at the back of the room with members of the Umlaut Nation and also 3/4 of Saviours.

It had been just over 4 years since the last time I had witnessed Tom Gabriel Warrior (TGW) take the stage. I've lamented in this space before how most bands today have no concept of TONE when it comes to their all-important guitars. Guitarists simply cop someone else's sound and pawn it off as their own to an audience who is either too young to know better or too lazy to care that what they're hearing isn't original. As with my other favorite Masters of guitar TONE Tony Iommi and Dave Chandler, TGW's TONE is completely his own. When you hear the unholy wail of his signature Ibanez Iceman it can only be one beast. TGW's TONE makes me subconsciously raise my hands in the air to form a claw in defiance against all that is normal and mainstream and safe. His TONE can be like a time machine that echos back and forth between my Inner Teenage Metalhead and my 21st Century self right here, right now. His TONE is holy and unholy at the same time.

TGW and his weapon of tone: The H.R. Giger Iceman
(Photo courtesy of Sensory Abuse)

Going into the show I think everyone expected the setlist to lean heavily on Triptykon material, but TGW surprised us by weaving a set that was a profound balance of Celtic Frost material and his new songs... and the result was one of the most compelling sets I've seen all year. For those who care, the setlist went like this:

• Procreation Of The Wicked (Celtic Frost)
• Goetia (Triptykon)
• Circle Of The Tyrants (Celtic Frost)
• Abyss Within My Soul (Triptykon)
• The Usurper (Celtic Frost)
• Synagoga Satanae (Celtic Frost)
• The Prolonging (Triptykon)
  

Yes, "only" 7 songs... but with 3 of the songs clocking in at 15-20 minutes each on album (probably a bit longer live) it wasn't about the quantity of songs but the quality of the performances. The band walked onstage and immediately engaged the audience with the old school blast of 'Procreation Of The Wicked' and it didn't take long to realize that Triptykon isn't simply TGW using anonymous backing musicians to "recreate" Celtic Frost. For the educated follower and listener of the man's work, Triptykon is TGW taking his Celtic Frost vision to another level and place. It's denser... even darker... and as a live act Triptykon has a different feel than his old band as well... Onstage the new band are tight but also agile... They played as any great band should play: They looked hungry onstage... Hungry to create... Hungry to express themselves... Hungry to connect both with the audience and themselves.... Hungry for the blood of success.

Triptykon Onstage
(Photo courtesy of Sensory Abuse)

Despite the focused attack and blanket of darkness that the band weaved onstage, I was surprised to see TGW smile a couple of times... and the vibe between him and Vanja Slajh (bass), V. Santura (guitar), and Norman Lonhard (drums) was palpable. They performed grounded in the present instead of chasing something from the past.

It's not often that a musician with a legacy like TGW can successfully join the shadow of his past with something new.... but that's exactly what Triptykon represents and at Slim's it was an almost incomprehensible beast of volume. The new songs were never a distraction and they were even elevated when presented alongside the older Celtic Frost material. The show closed with the new song 'The Prolonging', a 20 minute journey that was beyond epic... and when it ended I was literally stunned. It was a damp and chilly night in San Francisco and I felt like I had just been tucked into bed under the song's crushing promise for retribution... and it was inspiring.

For the newbies, Umlaut has been following TGW's career since the very earliest days of Hellhammer. Also, in his magnificent book Only Death Is Real, TGW actually namechecked my old Metal 'zine Whiplash...

From page 109 of Only Death Is Real

Whiplash #1 - 1983

Having something that I created (along with my friend Sam Kress... R.I.P..) being recognized like that by one of my Music / Metal heroes made my head spin. How did Hellhammer even get a copy of my 'zine in Switzerland back then!? Anyway, at one point in the evening I had the opportunity to finally meet TGW after all these years... and my life came full circle in an instant:


Me: "Do you remember the 'zine Whiplash?"
Tom G. Warrior: "Of course I do..."
Me: "That was my 'zine.."
Tom G. Warrior: "Are you Brian?"

Did you hear that? That was the sound of my jaw hitting the floor. To say that I was left speechless by that conversation would be a complete understatement... The Rock Godz work in mysterious ways, man.

It was an amazing night to be in San Francisco... First, the Giants moved on to the World Series for the first time in 8 years (SPORTS!) and the city had played host to one of THE best Metal shows of the year! The entire night was very life affirming for me and a huge THANKS to Steve at CM for making sure I was taken care of at the show.

I didn't do a proper merch audit, but if you bought one of every Triptykon merch item you would have paid around $150 (I think). On the way back to the car, some pimply-faced teenagers called me a fag. The next day I attempted to visit the nearby Giants Dugout store. There were almost as many people waiting in line to get into the store as there had been at this show. Crazy... Winning Sports Team = Procreation of the Wicked!

Click HERE to see Photo Ray's shots from the night... and click HERE for Tom G. Warrior's blog post about tonight! Amazing..

Cinco de Metal

Cannibal Corpse / 1349 / Skeletonwitch
Slim's, San Francisco
May 5, 2010


I know... The title of this post is way too obvious but what else do you expect on THE Hispanic day of the year? Plus, there's something ironic about seeing a group of drunk white guys wearing sombreros and fake moustaches waiting to get into a Metal show. Anyway, this was a rock solid bill on paper and it would have been hard for it to fail in real life. As I arrived at Slim's there was a parking spot on the street, but I noticed some shattered car window glass in the gutter. A voice in the back of my head told me not to park there, so I opted for the pay lot instead... and the lesson here is to listen to those voices in your head... but more on this later.

Slim's was jam packed sold out and you knew it was going to be a "good" night in that room because the floor was wet from condensation and spilled drinks. However, a bullet belt made out of small caliber bullets isn't really a bullet belt even when it's worn by a skinny girl.. I'm just saying.

Skeletonwitch: Skeletonwitch and Umlaut haven't been in the same room since they played a "secret" show at The Knockout on Mission Street back in, like, November 2008... so it's been awhile. I have to say 'Beyond The Permafrost' was the song highlight of the night for me; the song's intro plays to a Metal hungry crowd perfectly... and the guys from Ohio are a good example of a band of Road Dogs who have sharpened their craft through months of touring and drinking beer on and offstage. Chance was equally impressive working the crowd as he was chugging Budweisers onstage. Although Skeletonwitch were my favorite band of the night, I hate to say it, but watching Chance chug Budweisers was like watching a dude chug bottled water... but that's because Umlaut is a Beer Snob. In between bands I discovered that Ted of Death Angel knows me by name... Kill as one!

1349: 1349 and Umlaut haven't been in the same room since they opened for the mighty Celtic Frost at The Fillmore back in, like, October 2006... so it's been awhile. 1349 exudes that real deal Norwegian vibe but, let's be honest, if they were from Sacramento and came onstage dressed like that they'd be hilarious. However, since everyone knows all men in Norway wear corpse paint (and every woman in Norway is tall and blond) their vibe is legit. It was funny watching Frost set up his drums wearing his corpse paint and then Seidemann arrived onstage wearing a robe with the hood pulled over his corpse painted face and Ravn came onstage wearing the same vintage Celtic Frost shirt that he wore onstage in 2006 at The Fillmore. Like I said, if 1349 were from Sacramento the costumes would not be as effective.


Unfortunately, as I've said in this space before, Slim's has probably the worst sound of any venue in town because of the restriction they have on their volume levels; it's ridiculous. A show like this should have a volume level that you can feel in your clothes, but generally it's so low you can literally have a normal conversation with someone, especially at the back of the room. Archaon's guitar tone was lost in the ether most of the time, but the band's Norwegian Star Power carried the set. Yes, I couldn't put a title to any 1349 song if I heard it (Sorry.. just being honest..) but it's not often you get to see real life Norwegians up close on this side of the planet. The only real bummer during the set was Robb Flynn of Machine Head invading my personal space... but it was all good. Have you ever had Norwegian black licorice?? It's NASTY. In between bands, Machine Head bought me a beer.

Cannibal Corpse: Cannibal Corpse and Umlaut haven't been in the same room since the 48 Hours Of Mayhem last Summer since I missed their set at Scion Fest in March... so it's been awhile. As Cannibal Corpse took the stage I pulled out my camera and I had 666 shots left on the memory card... METAL! The last time that happened was at Tidal Wave 11. CC always bring it live but Pat was especially on fire with his lead work... and as he lit up the hot and sweaty crowd with his fretboard brutality I couldn't help thinking back on how cool he'd been to Photo Ray and I at Scion Fest. Also, the audience participation at Cannibal Corpse shows are always heartwarming reminders of how Metal can bring sweaty people together.


(Yes, I know... Umlaut needs a new camera.. one that does low light situations better, etc. etc.)

FYI: Umlaut is NOT going to be like everyone else and make a comment on the size of Corpsegrinder's neck or how much he headbangs onstage. Old news, kidz. Every Metalhead knows that Cannibal Corpse loves and respects the ladies... and it was fucking romantic when Corpsegrinder did the unexpected and dedicated 'Priests Of Sodom' to all the ladies in the room instead of 'Fucked With A Knife'. Do you hear that? That's the sound of the 6 or 7 females in the room swooning...

There was a Jello sighting (the first in awhile) and I also witnessed an awkward Machine Head sandwich; I felt kind of sorry for "the meat" in that sandwich, but it was special I guess. As I was leaving I stopped to say "Hey / Hi" to my old Metal brutha Gary Holt... who happens to be on the cover of the current issue of Decibel. You gotta support the locals, man... Always.

If you bought one of every Cannibal Corpse merch item you would have paid around $400. On the way back to the car, some pimply-faced teenagers called me a fag. As I said at the start of this rant, when I arrived at Slim's there was a parking spot on the street, but I noticed some shattered car window glass in the gutter. A voice in the back of my head told me not to park there, so I opted for the pay lot. After the show I noticed that the car that had taken that parking spot had its passenger side window smashed. Thank you Inner Voice! Wait... what are you saying now? Kill!? Kill who?? Oh..... Okay!!

Morbid Tales

Celtic Frost / Sun O))) / Goatwhore / 1349
The Fillmore, San Francisco
October 3, 2006


This was the first time Celtic Frost has toured the U.S. in 17 years. Tickets for The Fillmore went on sale 6 months ago, which was kinda brilliant since a genuine, slow burning hype built up around the show amongst the Old Metal crowd. That hype was ratcheted up a notch when the new Celtic Frost album was released in May and it was fookin' gleat!

The hype came to fruition as I ran into many Old Metal people as soon as I entered the lobby. I sort of recognized one guy wearing a Witchfinder General shirt and he greeted me by name like an old friend... Unfortunately, I had no idea who he was, but we had a good conversation anyway. I felt bad, but it would have been lame to ask his name after I had pretended to know him. Also, for the first time in probably 20 years I was in the same concert venue as John Silence!

We arrived in time to see Goatwhore, who were just as awful as when I saw them 2 months ago with Venom. They committed the cardinal sin of any support act: They mentioned the headliner to win the crowd over ("Are you ready to see Celtic Frost?!!!").

To be honest, I wasn't in the mood for the endless bottom end of Sunn 0))), but it was cool that former Melvins' bassist Mark Deutrom was in the lineup. That being said, Sunn 0))) definitely brought drama to the night with their smoke machine overkill, hooded robes, and effective lighting... although it also says something that 1/2 the crowd cheered and the other 1/2 booed when they left the stage.

Celtic Frost were everything an "old band" should be: seasoned performers with the musical chops and songs to back it up. On top of that, their new material sounds just as relevant as any new band out there. Long story short: Venom and Trivium can't carry Celtic Frost's jock.

At one point Celtic Frost brought the singer from the opening band 1349 out to sing 'The Usurper' (it was 1349's final night on the tour)... 1349 are from Norway and the singer had a genuine Scandinavian Death Metal thing about him (in a good way); he was not a poser.

Best Quote:
Lori Acid King - "Where's he from?"
Me - "He's not from around here."

Trivia: 1349 is the year The Plague was brought to Norway. No matter what you might think about Metal Geeks, most of us tend to be History Geeks as well!

The highlight for me was 'Into The Crypts Of Rays', although Ref would say it was the old Hellhammer song, and John would say it was 'Necromantical Screams' > 'Dawn of Meggido' back-to-back. Discuss amongst yourselves.

This was the 24th gig I've attended this year and I gotta say it was my favorite show of the year (so far). Every year there seems to be one show that reminds me of my roots, a show that reminds me of my true Music Geek nature (for better or worse)... and Celtic Frost were that for me in 2006. By the way, have you heard the new Paul Westerberg soundtrack CD?

Witchfinder General shirts = 2. If you bought one of every Celtic Frost merch item you would have paid around $300. On the way back to the car, some pimply-faced teenagers called us fags. The next day, the Old Metal buzz in the e-mails from friends about the show was Old Metal F-U-N! Long story short: We all had a GREAT time and some of us actually bought merch. I wore my new Celtic Frost shirt to work and met with Japanese business partners while wearing it. METAL.


'Into The Crypts Of Rays' - 1985
Umlaut's Metal brutha Dave provided this insight into the show:

Something you may not have known: The fellow singing for Sunn o))) that night was one of the original frontmen for Mayhem, "Attila". He fronted the band in their heyday of murder, drugs, & suicide. He came in, I believe, after "Dead" blew his brians out. How METAL!!!

How could Umlaut be so clueless about this!? I'm a poser... For the newbies: Mayhem are one of THE legendary Scandinavian Black Metal bands.

Even if you're not into Metal you should read the amazing book Lords Of Chaos by Michael Moynihan and Didrik Soderlind. It's a fascinating look at the Norwegian Black Metal underground, with a focus on the mayhem and murder resulting from the scene's anti-Christian stance. Church burnings A-Go-Go!

All Punks are complete pussies compared to these Norwegian Metalheads.

===
A report from San Diego by Drunk Ted:

Saw Celtic Frost last night. I was shocked how many people I knew there that were/are closet metal fans! At least half a dozen that I personally know, a couple of bartenders from Live Wire and the Tower Bar too.

Another shock was how nice everyone was there! That includes the band. Friends were to be made everywhere. Drinks were being bought for strangers on more than one occasion.

Waited in line around 8pm to get access to the signing the band was doing. When we got in, the band was nowhere to be seen. I brought my UK copy of Tom's book, "Are You Morbid?" for him to sign. A few other people did the same.

Weird thing about this show was that it was all ages. Last time Celtic Frost came around was almost 20 years ago! So anyone who was underage was most likely not even born last time they came around! Because it was all ages, the bar was upstairs where the kids couldn't go. Not too many kids at the show either.

So before the show, we're at the top bar wondering "Where's the signing? How come they're not here yet?" Was kind of pissed I had to carry the book around all night, so me & my friend went up to this other guy who had the book and made some comment about the signing. He said "It's going on right now, downstairs"! We had just checked not even 5 minutes before.

We ran back down. Sure enough, there they were. Tom & Martin were very, very nice to the fans. As I handed Tom my book, I told him how I interviewed him last time he came here. He said "For real?" I said "Yeah, and you chewed me out for making a face when you mentioned the Cure as an influence". Told him that what I was trying to express was surprise, not disgust. Tom smiled at me and said "I was very young then". I said "I was too." Then he said "Now I'm old." I said "I'm older, but not going to admit being old."

What was really funny was that Ain & Warrior were completely friendly and down to earth talking to fans. But when they were asked to pose for a picture, they did the devil horns and tried to look very mystical and morbid. Sharp contrast to what they were really like.

Goatwhore was great, but completely ruined by the cookie monster vocals. Reminded me of Kreator and Possessed. I had flashbacks to '85. Too bad their singer completely ruined the band.. If I could buy an instrumental CD of theirs, I would've.

The 2nd band played one song. (Sunn?) For about 45 minutes. The same note. Very loud. Like the Melvins, but they only played one note. It actually was pretty cool, but only for the first 20 minutes. I cracked the whole upstairs bar up by yelling "ENCORE" when they finally finished. It was only after 30 minutes that I realized that this whooping sound wasn't a part of their music! Turns out they had set off every single smoke alarm in the place with their fog machine. (Noticed it when I went to the bathroom and the strobe alarm there was going off).

Celtic Frost proved that they were really ahead of their time. All those stoner metal bands owe a great big debt to them! They were great, but I sure would've liked to have heard more of the new songs live. At least they didn't cut the set short this time because of a "riot" (which consisted of 3-4 guys running behind the stage when they last played in San Diego). And Martin Ain looked completely bad ass! I was freaking out on him the whole show.

The show was probably half full. 3-400 out of 700, I'm guessing.

Ted

===
Umlaut's old friend John Silence has posted an excellent review of the San Francisco show:

"A good night out, indeed. It’s hard to compare the 1985 show with the 2006 one. The eighties show had more of an impact on me (and Voivod was better than all of the bands opening for them this time around) but I think this one was probably better. I’ve mellowed out a bit and seen a lot of very different live shows in the intervening years, but this was a very welcome return to the childlike excitement of the old days. Heavy metal is a very potent form of music if it’s done right. Celtic Frost does it right."

Click HERE to read John's complete reaction to the night.

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The Feel Good Show of 2006:

Okay, who would have thought Celtic Frost would be the feel good show of the year??! I can't remember the last time there was such a universal post-gig buzz in the Umlaut Coven about a show!

Here's another excellent Frost addendum, this one by Umlaut friend Volume Merchant Ted:

We are taking litigation against an old guard SF merchant who is infringing on our bands rights etc. and I had to be at a mediation in Palo Alto super early..knowing I'd be in suit and tie and have to be alert, coherent, and well spoken, I made the difficult decision to skip the show...this was even more painful cause this four band card was MY hard music dream bill for the year! Unlike Umlaut, I like Goatwhore and LOVE fucking Sunn 0)))))))... have all their releases, a bunch of live stuff, side projects and have seen them with Xasthur as a guest...

Anyway, Uncle Larry, my roommate, works at The Fillmore. I came home the next day and saw a Celtic Frost hoodie hanging on one of the dining room chairs...Larry is not a headbanger but he likes to procure swag at gigs (Stuff We All Get... is a lame acronym, if this is what it in fact stands for, but that's another post)...for some reason I noticed the hoodie was not new, it had no drawstring.... As it also fucking reeked of perfume..I thought Uncle Larry had scored a headbanger chick and brought her back to the nest for some rock and roll RnR....anyway the next night the true story of the hoodie came out as I inquired to hear details of how my roomie bagged a backstage betty at the Celtic Frost gig!

Turns out he was wearing a Slayer workshirt I had given him a bit back (he is sz medium so he is the recipient of more samples than he could ever wear in three lifetimes!) and one of the band members had seen it on him, told him they had never seen it before, and that they attend every Slayer show they can and that they collect Slayer merch!

Larry, being a cool guy (and to be honest, not the biggest Slayer fan) immediately removed the shirt and gave it to the dude. The dude could not fucking believe it and would not take for granted whatsoever that Larry would accept no payment or any other reciprocation...after much earnest and friendly convincing the Celtic Frost dude removed the hoodie and insisted Uncle Larry have it....not the sordid story I was hoping for but seems in keeping with the interview I saw with the band on Headbanger's Ball this week....cool guys...they love Slayer, but dude, that fucking cologne has got to go. Some kind of Brut 70's style shit. Damn.

===
Warrior Mail:

Okay, this post easily rivals the legendary Kaiser R.I.P. for audience participation!

Brad, Umlaut's Old Metal brutha and now an ex-patriot Yank, chimed in all the way from Prague, Czech Republic with his Celtic Frost memories:

I wrote Tom Warrior after the "Triumph of Death" EP by Hellhammer, probably to suggest retirement, I don't remember actually. In early 1985, I was sent a demo/preview cassette of "Morbid Tales" with a hand-written letter from Tom W. thanking me for the support. The preview tracks were good, I bought the album. I was shocked that I liked it so much given how awful Hellhammer was just 2 years prior. Still have the letter and cassette of course.

It all makes sense now. Tom W. was a design arts graduate turned recording artist a-la Chuck D of Public Enemy. Being Swiss he's a natural diplomat. Having higher education he's got a grasp of the deeper meaning in addition to the visceral beauty of well-crafted aggressive music. Somewhere in there he's got a talent for marketing too. He viewed every contact as an opportunity and built up a worldwide audience by doing it the right way. He earned his success and deserves whatever he's got.

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Click HERE for some GREAT pics from the San Francisco show (THANKS RAY)!