Thursday, June 22, 2006

Redrum Card

The exciting sequel to Scorpions vs. Poland and World Cup 2006!

June 21st: Earlier this week, Umlaut was in NYC on business. While waiting for my homebound flight at JFK, I watched the Argentina vs. Netherlands match in the airport's sports bar. At least they had 19 plasma screens and Stella on tap.

An older couple were sitting at the end of the bar when a young guy sat next to them. The lad started talking to the couple about his recent travels in Europe, where he watched some of the World Cup games amidst the mania that's engulfed the rest of the world.

The kid was obviously a soccer fan and he did his best to explain the game to his elders... Even after the man said "I can barely tolerate hockey because there's no scoring..." Which, to me, only demonstrated America's general obsession with WINNING and not understanding the concept of something not involving a clear-cut, black & white WINNER and LOSER. Apply this to current events and discuss amongst yourselves.

Anyway, as the young guy continued in his attempt to educate the couple about the game, the man finally snapped and said "Soccer is the most popular sport in the world next to NASCAR."

It was the equivalent of the man bitch slapping this young wippersnapper and his Commie-like worldview. The soccer fan tried to be polite after that comment, but their conversation faded to silence at that point.

We're an American band... we come into your town.. we help you party down.

On another note: I was able to watch three World Cup games at 35,000 feet via DirectTV on my Jet Blue flights. Pretty fawkin' cool. Truth be told, the best part of my NYC trip was hanging out with non-work friends at a great pub in Tribeca (Souths on 273 Church St., NYC - Hi Micki & Simone - BRASIL!!). I was wearing a Black Rebel Motorcycle Club shirt and not long after we were seated the bartender put BRMC on the stereo. Nice. Good friends, good food, cold beer.

June 22nd: Miatomic and I spent the morning in the Kezar Pub to support the U.S. side as they went up against Ghana... The place was packed, and I couldn't help but hear a voice in my head say "Soccer is the most popular sport in the world next to NASCAR."

Kudos to the harried waitress who had to strong-arm her way through the crowd to take and deliver drink and food orders. Sitting next to us was a hardcore U.S. Fan, who I could imagine wearing a Darth Vader costume to Raider games. He was loud and outspoken but, to his credit, obviously a student of soccer.

Best Quote - U.S. Fan after being told that the ref, who had just charged the U.S. with a questionable yellow card, was German: "Maybe we should think about invading them!"

IMO Landon Donovon is to soccer what Winger was to Metal. He should be stripped of his U.S. Soccer uniform in disgrace and sentenced to 4 years of hard labor at a Walmart.

As the defeated home side filed out of the bar, U.S. Fan stood on his bar stool and sang 'God Bless America' while holding aloft his team scarf. No one else joined in his patriotism.. Dude, America needs a better fight song. Personally, I was already trying to decide whether to wear my Iron Maiden or my Motorhead shirt this weekend for the England v. Ecuador game.

Anyway, if you missed it the first time 'round, click HERE for the riveting prequel to all of this Beautiful Game madness.